Am I Supposed To Change The Story?

To whoever this may concern,

Yes, you are right. I did speak up about those things you did to me; even when the world went against me, and took everything from me because you chose to deny responsibility for your actions, and victimise me by making me out to be a liar.

Even when everyone stood up and agreed they had all of the so-called evidence, I stood tall with my truth because,

Evidence doesn't always tell the truth about hidden scars, bruises, and emotional damage. The silent facts are always hidden beneath what is written on paper, when a victim has been terrorised into silence.

You would be right in saying that there wasn't enough evidence from the authorities to back up my truth, but see this:

A young person trying to protect herself, even when there are children involved does not always feel safe speaking up, when the perpetrator is hitting her behind closed doors, and telling everyone that she is crazy.

Silence speaks for itself, and professionals do not rally around all day and night to see the real blows unfold. Real blows take place once they have left, because perpetrators are often too much of a coward to come forward, and admit what they have done. There is always some excuse to get them out of it.

You see, when you are afraid of what will happen to you and your children, because millions come after you for speaking up, its a mental block that places a permanent gag over our mouths.

Wrong, but it is in some cases, safer than getting another triple blow not just from the perpetrator but from his minions; especially when the very people who are supposed to protect you, don't, and the only thing that stops you and the children from getting hurt is silence, because anything you say, causes more violence from the minions that the perpetrator has built with his manipulation, gas lighting, and sob stories so convincing, that everyone believes he is the victim.

Here is me not hiding just to protect you anymore; the only victims in that story were me and the children I struggled to bring up, because you left us that way.

We almost died in that situation, you know this; but you wouldn't care, because all you wanted was to protect yourself. You knew that if you held yourself accountable, there would be consequences that you could not handle; therefore, it was easier to blame me than yourself, because you knew I was vulnerable and gullible when we first met, and you knew that it would be easy to get people to believe you because,

Some had known you for years, while others had only seen your fake 'soft and caring side.'

It didn't just take therapy for me to recover. It took countless losses, trauma after trauma, and the loss of my children to learn to understand how much of a fool I was for trusting you.

That was until I met someone who took me by the hand, weathered every single storm, and stood with me, even when things became deeply traumatising.

I laugh when you tell everyone that we divorced, just because everyone involved with us told you that.

I admit, we almost considered it until we realized that we were being played.

Shock-horror to you:

It's 2026, and we have remained married since 1999.

We never divorced. We pulled together like real husband and wives do, and we worked through it, supported each other, and for the second time we pulled our relationship out of the mud, regardless of what they told you.

You forget that my husband can remember how we met; a situation you were never involved in, and something you will never understand or know. Never the less, there is documented proof and evidence as to why that hospital approved of us being together, and that is something you can not dispute.

The point in this letter is not to relive the drama from that past. There is no use in destroying this beautiful life I have worked so hard to build up, just to let you pull it down again.

I wouldn't waste yours or my own breath trying.

The point is to ask you,

Am I supposed to change the story, because you choose not to be accountable?

Not one of you, needs to answer this; I can answer it for you.

I will not change the story just because you choose to not be accountable for your wrongdoings. I will still stand, even after all these decades, with the truth, and that truth is you abused me.

I choose to honor the truth that I know is the sole and honest truth, that I was never an abuser, but was someone who was abused; and that it is not happeniing now, and has not happened for decades.

I choose to honor the truth of my life in the present, which is peaceful, beautiful, secure and happy.

I have a wonderful husband of whom I am confident in my new role as carer for, because of disabilities that you would never understand, because they hushed them up and denied them.

However, the point is they have been acknowledged today, and they speak more volume for some of those horrid things that happened after the door closed on my past with you from a medical point of view.

My husband had reasons for his behaviour.

The question is what were yours? Maybe I shouldn't ask, because you will only lie again.

I got my own life once the door closed:

I'm a writer, author, and singer with an upcoming cover song plus one of my own (these are things that you told me I shouldn't do).

I'm also a very loving grandparent to two gorgeaus grandchildren who I helped protect and support my adult child with, and I have been since the day they were born, with no problems.

And;

One more thing.

I'm about to move somewhere I always dreamed of living.

I got better, made my relationships stronger, and I achieved my best life without you.

The life you told me I couldn't achieve, has been achieved, and my only hope is that you can swallow that, whilst living with what you did.

Signed,

The woman I'm supposed to

be.