AITA for calling my Father-in-Law a creepy pervert?

Dear Confessions,

The situation with my FIL is weird. I have a seven-month-old and I have been breast feeding since she was born, well as we have started weaning her, I am trying some of the breast milk recipes. I put a picture in our family group chat of her with a breastmilk ice lolly and my father-in-law immediately commented saying “I want one of those” with the heart-eyes emoji. I replied back saying “WTH they’re breast milk!”. He apologised and said he didn’t read the caption on the photo.

I thought this was a genuine mistake so didn’t think any more of it.

Well, this week he came over to our house and I had just finished making some muffins for my baby. The recipe called for a cup of breastmilk. They were on the side cooling when he came in and asked who had been baking as the muffins looked lovely. I said I had but they were for the baby and contained breast milk.

I then had to leave the room to grab something for a moment and when I came back, I was horrified to see my FIL had just finished eating one of the muffins. I asked him what the hell he was doing and that I had told him they contained my breastmilk!

He said he didn’t mind, and that breastmilk was vegan anyway (this man is not and has never been a vegan). I shouted that he was a “creepy pervert” and that he needed to get out of my house.

Shortly after he left my mother-in-law rang me and shouted at me saying I was out of order for kicking him out. I asked why on earth she wanted her husband drinking my breast milk! She fell silent after that and quickly hung up. I suspect he hadn’t told her the full story.

Did I over-react?

That is creepy and weird. I understand that people have strange kinks and fetishes, and everyone is entitled to those. But keep them outside of the family and solely between consenting adults.

I wonder in this situation what he thought your reaction was going to be? Did he think you simply wouldn’t notice the muffin missing? Or that you would nod along with his excuse that breast milk was vegan. I don’t see any way in which he would have escaped the situation without you feeling uncomfortable and violated and then going on to expose him to his wife.

It is rare that a question is so unusual that it surprises me. I can only imagine the conversations you have since had with your husband and if you have seen them again, your MIL and FIL since the muffin incident. Let us know what your husband thinks of this ordeal because I have no idea how my husband would react in such an unusual situation. I think we would both be as baffled as you are.

The answer to your question though is no. I don’t believe you over reacted. You were surprised and caught of guard by what seems to be a bit of a strange and unexpected fetish. It happened in your kitchen and likely in front of your daughter. I don’t think there is a right way to react to this development.

I think how they behave after this event will indicate how you should behave going forward. I certainly would be very guarded with what I leave on my countertops and wouldn’t be sharing any more pictures of breast milk recipes anywhere that he had access to them as it would make me uncomfortable.

It may be that you take these precautions and try to act like it never happened. I would bet that there have already been some tense conversations taking place in their home.