A weeping daughter

Hey mom,

I hope you’re doing well. I know you love me. So do I. You are the best of all mothers. Being the only child and only daughter of the family, dad and you have poured your tenderness, care, and love upon me. Even if dad is not alive anymore, I’m still grateful for the attention, sacrifices, and devotion you guys have shown me since birth.

Today is mother’s day. It’s your day! But before I wish you a happy mother’s day, I want to tell you something I’ve been hiding for years. I have tried to reveal it to you many times, but I didn’t dare to let it out. Mom, before I go further, I ask for your forgiveness. Yes, forgiveness. The secret I’m about to reveal will hurt you. I don’t know if you will still love me afterward, but I need to tell you. I can’t keep it anymore.

It happened twelve years ago when I was in middle school. I was fourteen-year-old, and I was in eighth grade. Mom, do you remember when you traveled to Boston when your sister, aunty Kimberley, had her first baby? I know you remember because you were excited and joyful. You told me that aunty and her husband have been expecting a child for years after their marriage. So you went to spend a week helping your younger sister take care of the newborn baby. After you left, something strange and shameful happened at home. I was in my bedroom doing my homework. I saw dad’s car parking in the driveway from my bedroom window. I ran downstairs to ask him for money for a field trip to the city aquarium. When dad entered the house, he was with a woman. She was tall, with long brown hair. She was wearing a pink dress and holding a black handbag. Here is how dad introduced her to me, “ Ivy, this Nova, my business partner. ” Dad and Nova sat in the living room. He offered her a drink. Both seemed relaxed and happy. I knew something was wrong. Dad gave me twenty-five dollars for the field trip, and I went upstairs to my bedroom. I couldn’t finish my homework. My head was spinning. “ Who is that lady, and why did dad bring her home?” I asked myself. Then I heard them walk by my room and go to your room. “ Why was Dad doing this to mom?” I asked myself. I was disturbed. I left my room and went to the kitchen, pretending to cook something. An hour or so later, Nova and dad left the house without uttering a word to me. The image is still present in my head. Dad put his right hand on her lip, opened the car door for her, and drove away. For the first time, I hated dad. As if what he did to you wasn’t enough, he threatened me when he returned home. He went into my bedroom and barked, “ Ivy, don’t say a word to your mom. If you do, you will be responsible for the outcome.”

Mom, since that day, I have lived with fear. Every day, dad’s words echo in my mind. I’m twenty-six years old today, but I’m still overwhelmed with anxiety when I think of dad’s words. Three years ago, when dad passed away, I told myself, “ Ivy, now is the time to reveal the secret.” Unfortunately, I didn’t have the courage to tell you. Forgive me, mom. Forgive my cowardness. You may ask yourself why I’m revealing the secret now? I decided to disclose the secret today because I’m afraid the same thing will happen to me. You know my fiancé David. And you also know that we are getting married in six months. If I keep the secret, what dad did to you may repeat in my marriage through David. I don’t want to experience that. I’m sorry, mom. I’m worried. You have loved dad with all your heart, but he took it for granted. He cheated on you with a woman who was less valuable than you. I don’t know how you will react after reading this letter. But, remember, I love you.

Happy mother’s day!

Your weeping daughter, Ivy.