10 Gifts for Soccer Moms

by Sean Reis 6 months ago in product review

Sometimes, the real MVPs are off the pitch. Find the best gifts for soccer moms in your life.

10 Gifts for Soccer Moms

Ahhh youth soccer... those were the days. I'll never forget the first uniform I wore that was my own: A red uniform, far too large for my five-year-old body (the number escapes me at the moment). The "red team" would score zero goals that season—with the lone exception of an own goal. Seriously. That's a true story. Our only goal, for an entire season, was an own goal—and if you don't believe me, then just ask my mom. She'll tell the same old tale; but speaking of whom, she was the real MVP that season.

Behind every youth soccer team—be they great or as terrible as our red team of 2001—there is the real MVP: The soccer mom (sometimes a team of soccer moms). After all, us five year olds had absolutely no idea what we were doing running up and down that pitch. And while our dads did their best to coach us... well, we were five. The highlights of every game featured our moms coming in clutch. Gatorade in every color, a nice and cozy blanket to keep us warm on the bench, and who could forget those orange slices—not all heroes wear capes, some drive minivans.

Years have passed since those days, but a soccer mom can still be found on every sideline. It's time we repay them for their service. These are the best gifts for soccer moms in your life.

Let's start with one of the more basic gift ideas. Like I said, Gatorade in every color was always ready for us on the sidelines. But guess what? Those tiny bottles weren't cheap—not to mention all that plastic destroying our planet... so save your soccer mom some money and save Mother Nature while you're at it with this seven-gallon cooler from Gatorade. If the kids all have reusable bottles, then all she'll need is water and this soccer mom necessity you can't live without to mix in and keep the team full of electrolytes.

Hopefully those little rascals won't have too much energy left in the tank after the game—that's nap time for parents and children alike!

Speaking of nap time, one of the best gifts for soccer moms is versatile in its use on and off the pitch: A blanket! Okay, so maybe an outdoor blanket wouldn't be the best for the post-game nap, but I'd be lying if I said I never fell asleep on one of these bad boys on the bench. Damn, did these keep us kiddos warm or what? (Sorry dad, I was all tuckered out from running up and down the field. Can I be the goalie next game? And tell mom to have a blanket in the net please.)

The real MVP shouldn't have to sit on those cold and uncomfortable metal bleachers. Get your soccer queen a throne to rule the sidelines! This chair is simpler than most—only available in a standard blue or black—but you can't go wrong with that Amazon price: $19.99... how do they even make money? Anyways, if something flashier suits your soccer mom, then I bet you can find another chair out there, just as long as you get her something a little more comfortable than those bleachers though. No one deserves that kind of torture, especially the woman who gave you life.

I cannot confirm this information, but judging by my guestimates, I think this tote bag would fit both the blanket and the chair—although the latter may have to stick out the top a tad. Must I say more? She has her blanket. She has her chair. Now all she needs is a nice, big tote bag that screams, "I'm a soccer mom and I'm proud." Thanks to Cocomo Soul, now she has it—one of the best gifts for soccer moms, indeed.

Did I say loud and proud? I'll be honest, "loud" was not and never will be a word that anyone would use to describe my mother, but I will never forget one of my friend's moms. Her voice must still echo around the pitch to this day. I don't remember if she had a megaphone, but I believe in later years she adopted the megaphone. As if she wasn't loud enough... if my memory serves me right, it was quite the addition to her soccer mom repertoire.

I know I mentioned reusable water bottles as one of the best gifts for soccer players earlier, but that may just be one of the most practical gift ideas for a soccer mom, so how about a tumbler? At 30 ounces and double-walled, this stainless steel tumbler from Zak Designs can hold your soccer mom's drink of choice, whether it be hot or cold—and a lot of it at that.

I don't know, maybe she could even throw in a splash of Bailey's to that coffee. No judgement here. A soccer mom (or a mother in general) ain't an easy job.

Easily the cutest gift for soccer moms that I have ever seen, it reads:

"Some people have to wait their entire lives to meet their favorite player...

Wait for it.

"I raised mine."

I know. Queue the waterworks. If I turned out to be the superstar athlete that my dad had always dreamed I would become, this would 100 percent be on my mother's keychain. However, you guessed it, that's not quite how things panned out for me. But still, is it not the cutest soccer mom gift you have ever seen?

Now that your soccer mom's crying over a wholesome keychain, she may need something to hide those tears. In all seriousness, though, it can get quite sunny on the pitch. It's worth noting that I don't know much about women's fashion, but I think these trendy sunglasses will come in handy on the sidelines. Feel free to disagree with my uneducated use of "trendy," but you can't deny the latter half of that sentiment.

Before I get to the good stuff... (Spoiler alert: It's orange slices.) The soccer moms used to take turns bringing one other thing: Ice pops! Even towards the end of fall, as winter was closing in fast, those popsicles were a sought after treat at the end of our losses. The best participation trophies we ever won. How did they stay cold all morning? Look no further than a portable cooler from Igloo.

Orange slices transportation devices (that rhymes). Every mom lovers her Tupperware. We have mountains of these handy containers at my house. But I digress. This may have fallen in with some of the most hilarious soccer mom memes circulating the internet in recent years, but only because it is true: Orange slices were the best part of youth soccer.

A refreshing, nutritious treat that tended to come at halftime, it was all orange slice smiles with this soccer mom tradition.

I take back what I said earlier about the tumbler. This isn't just one of the best gifts for soccer moms, this is the most practical gift for soccer moms.

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Sean Reis

Writer | Poet | Photographer

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