The Gnawing Hunger Thirteen

When Bo finally got back to the cabin, everything was quiet. There were absolutely no sounds or signs of life, either. Bo still held his breath as he walked into the room. Doing his best to possibly tip toe through the kitchen. Fearing that someone was up but that he couldn't hear them. And he didn't want to do anything to get them to notice he was there. Partially resisting the urge to hold his breath as he did so. Yet, there was no one awake or any real signs that someone was awake.

It was something that immediately relieved him. As he had no idea of how to explain where he was. Or why in the Hell he was sneaking around like this. As well as why his hands were so bloody, too.

Another thing he really couldn't think of how to explain.

There was really nothing that came to mind as he silently walked down. At least not in a way that wouldn't freak others out. Especially, his already frazzled Mother who probably checked in on him while he was sleeping. Maybe more than once. His Grandpa probably had to distract her from doing it at least thirteen times. Which was good. If Eleanore noticed she was outside with Thorn then she'd flip the fuck out. And it was something he really didn't want. Bo took a deep breath as he heard her snoring in her room. The sounds somewhat eased him as he finally got into the bathroom. Quickly, he turned on the sink and washed his hands. There was way more blood on them then he thought there was.

A little bit was even on his hoodie for fucks sake.

This was going to be shoved into the bottom of the hamper for a bit. He was going to be washing everything in that as soon as humanly possible. Before his Mom could take one step into the laundry room. Which would be after he hid his little treasure properly. There was this strange feeling about that. Thinking of the horrible thing he pulled out of a tortured woman as a 'treasure'. But he had really no idea what else he could call it. Or why in the world he wasn't just getting rid of it. Just what in the Hell was even the organ in his hoodie pocket anyway?

He didn't know.

It wasn't like he could just ask everyone else for an opinion. They'd have so many damn questions for him. Stuff that he just couldn't explain to anyone all that easily. Not without him thinking that he officially lost it. Like he had killed an animal or something like that. As he didn't want any of them to think he murdered some poor creature with his bare hands. That's if they were being generous. And he couldn't explain why he did that. There was no lie that he could immediately come up with. Though he could go with the lie that he killed an animal for some reason.

There was just no way he could think of a plausible or sane reason to it.

Like why in the Hell did he do this for? What was going wrong in his head? Just what was wrong with him that he had done that? What animal did he hurt during this? Had it been someone's pet? Where was the thing's body?

Did he even bury it?

That would be just way more difficult to lie about! So much more harder than telling the truth would be. Not more then the why he had done it though. But a definite near second to it.

What was he going to do about any of this? About Hawthorne in general?

Then the idea slowly dawned on him as he turned off the sink. Drying his hands on the nearby towel that his Mom had brought. Grateful he got the blood off of his hands as he wouldn't forgive himself if the towel got messy. First thing first, he would put the organ in a ziplock bag from the kitchen. And then he'll hide it in his dufflebag in the room. That way no one would ever be able to find it. As no one in the cabin went through his things. Which would only be found out if he went missing or something. At least that's what he was thinking about as he stood there. Tomorrow, his birthday, he was going to lead Thorn to Lake Hattie. Sure, it was sort of frozen over. From what he remembered, no one ever went into the middle because it never thoroughly froze over. But, hopefully Hawthorne wouldn't know about that. And it would literally be to his advantage if Thorn didn't know. Soon as they walked to the middle of the lake, he would break it. Making sure that Hawthorne couldn't get free as they went down.

Even if he drowned, he'd be sure that the monster that turned him would die along with him. That way his Mom, Grandpa, and his only remaining best friend would be safe from this.

After all, there was no way in knowing that if Hawthorne died...that if he died, Bo would cured of whatever the Hell this was.

Though he highly doubted that Hawthorne would tell him. Even in he pressed him for more details about it. Figuratively and literally. Though the idea of slamming down that little creep and trying to force him to tell the truth...it felt sort of good. And there was an urge to just go get him. Throttle him until he went freaking blue or until his neck snapped. Whichever came first in his mind. It had to be him dying by his hand for him to feel better and safer about the whole thing.

But that strange sensation clawed itself over his mind. And reminded him of the so-called control that Thorn said he had over him. Of which he sort of vaguely understood the extent of it. Yet, he feared what the creature could do to him. Bo set the towel back in place. Sort of not sure if that damned creature was telling the entire truth or not. That maybe it was really just himself holding himself back from harming the damned monster.

It seemed a lot more possible than the transformation was doing it. Even young vampires have more control over themselves than that.

Putting the towel back down, he hurried out of the bathroom. Shutting the door as quietly as humanly possible. Looking down the hall both ways before quietly walking down it. There still was no one awake in that moment. But that didn't mean no one would be waking up soon. So that meant he absolutely had to hurry the Hell up. And he quickly sped walked down the hall to the kitchen. Going over to the cabinet that had the ziplock bags inside. Taking one out as quick as humanly possible. All of this was going pretty nicely for once. Though he wasn't going to say this out loud as he feared he'd jinx himself.

As his luck wasn't the greatest as of late. It wasn't like he had to explain to anyone why, though.

Bo hurriedly got the thing he pulled out of the woman out of the hoodie pocket. Then swiftly dumped it into the bag that he pulled out. Wiping his hand off on the side of the hoodie and feeling stupid for doing that. At least he was going to be washing it in a little while. Which made him feel a little better about his fuck up. Then as quick as he could, he closed the bag. Carefully closing the cabinet a little bit afterward. Quick as a flash, he then shoved this bag into the hoodie pocket. Feeling a little better about it being in there. As it wouldn't be making cleaning it harder than it already was. At least the damn thing was a red color. That way the stains that were already there didn't stand out too much. Or that's what he kept telling himself as he started walking to his room. Feeling like he was going to be caught at any damn second now.

And fearing that he was going to be institutionalized at best. Possibly having the cops called on him at worst. Though he wasn't sure if he would be imprisoned if they called the cops. Then it hit him that they would have the organ tested. Probably find out that it came from a human. Maybe that it had come from that woman he watched get murdered.

Something that made him shudder as he stood there.

It just further cinched his decision to keep them all in the dark. There was no way in Hell they needed to know about this. As none of them would be able to stop something like Thorn like that. Or even stand a snowball's chance in Hell against him. Hell, Bo wasn't entirely sure of his own chances against the horrible bastard. There was a giant chance that he would fail. No matter how much he wanted to believe that he wouldn't. Realistically, Bo knew that he didn't have any real chance against him.

That despite how hard he tried to kill him, he wouldn't. And it wasn't like he wouldn't put up a fight. Bo would fight like Hell to keep himself alive. To keep everyone in the cabin safe from getting harmed, too. Part of him had a plan to just rip Hawthorne's throat out with his teeth. Take back everything he had stolen from the cabin the other day. Then wash everything that the monster stole. Before returning it to Arthur's parents. Excluding the ones that Thorn had worn of course. As there was no way he could easily fix the torn up clothing.

And, unlike his hoodie, there wouldn't be an easy way to wash out the amount of blood he had on it.

That's if he was lucky during the fight and survived. The actual likelihood of him managing any of that? Slim to none if he were being entirely honest with himself. And as much as he disliked that, he knew he was in way over his head.

If this situation was being in water. He would be right at the bottom of Lake Hattie. And there was no way of him getting out, either. No one coming to save him from the fate he was in. To throw him essentially a life preserve. Bo was drowning in this whole thing and he couldn't tell anyone. It wasn't like they would believe him in the slightest bit. And, despite how much he wanted to say something, he wasn't sure if there was any way he could save himself.

This was by far the worst thing that had happened to him.

Bo took a deep breath as he went back down the hall. Looking at the doors to his Mom and Grandpa's room. Neither of them stirring as he silently passed them. He quietly opened the door to the room he shared with his remaining friend. Heading over to his bac as silently as he could. And swiftly shoving his precious bundle deep into the duffle bag. Putting some clothes over it and picking out a new shirt to be wearing. Since it was the only thing that had gotten any blood on it. From what he could tell at the very least. While he pulled it out, he glanced at the bed Xander was sleeping in. Trying to be sure that his best friend was still sleeping soundly.

A wave of relief washed over him as he noticed he was. Laying on his side as he snored softly while laying there.

It felt good that he wasn't going to be inconveniencing his friend. Or scaring his friend either. And he didn't want to make his friend hysterical over it. Okay, okay that was a bit of an exaggeration over the situation. But Xander would probably be more then a bit concerned about what he had been doing. Along with the fact that he had been out out the house for a long time.

Probably ask him over a ton questions, too.

None of which he felt all that confident he could properly answer. As he couldn't properly think of a decent lie right now. At least one that didn't sound really stupid. Or like he was having some sort of mental break down.

Which definitely wouldn't work out well for him.

With this in mind, Bo quietly left the bedroom. Silently shutting the door behind himself as he went. Then hurriedly went over to the bathroom to change his top. Heart pounding in his chest as he locked the door behind himself. Glancing at it as he slipped off the articles of clothes that had blood on it. Pulling the new shirt back on as he took a deep breath to calm himself down. Remind himself that panic would screw him over and that he couldn't panic in the moment. Despite knowing that logically, he couldn't get himself to entirely relax in the slightest bit. Then again who could relax with something like this in their hands?

Trying to not overthink this, he balled the clothes up. Making absolutely sure that the blood wasn't visible. Soon as Bo was absolutely sure there wasn't, he unlocked the bathroom door. Walking to the laundry room as fast as he could. Doing the utmost to be quiet as he shut the door behind himself. Not wanting anyone in the cabin to know what he was doing. Even if it was something as simple as hiding clothes in the dirty bloodied clothes hamper. Making a mental note to do the laundry later.

That way his Mom wouldn't have to see the blood.

As she was very squeamish at the sight of blood. Not to the point of passing out or anything. Eleanore just didn't really feel comfortable with it. Hell, she barely handled herself when he got his period at twelve. How could she handle seeing that much on his hoodie? She wouldn't, he knew this without a doubt. Didn't need her to see the blood to know that. Bo tried to not imagine her finding the damn thing. How it would make her freak the Hell out. Especially, after everything that had happened not that long ago. But the images of her screaming in fear persisted in his mind. Not letting him have one second of peace as he put the lid on the hamper back down. Leaving the room as soon as he did that.

Just how justifiably terrified she would be that something was wrong with him.

And he hated this. Hated the very idea of scaring her. Or the possibility of scaring her. His heart sank at the idea of doing so. Bo did his best to not think of it. Trying his hardest to not dwell over the ideas.

It was difficult as his mind just didn't want to let it go.

With this, he decided to go to the kitchen and make a light breakfast for himself. One that was very light. To at least give the illusion that things were fine with him. That he was his normal self. And that he wasn't sick in the slightest bit. Well, he believed that they would think he was ill for not eating.

His Mom would be at the very least worried he was ill.

If she found evidence that he wasn't eating breakfast, she would get scared. Fuck, she probably would make him go to the hospital. Definitely would force him into her car and drive him out there. As well as make him tell her why he hadn't eaten breakfast. Even if it was just once. And that was something that he wasn't confident that he could easily lie about. Well, at least come up with a half-way decent one.

So he just had to make himself eat food that he wasn't really hungry for. And just have the lightest option that he could easily get away with. Like maybe a few pieces of toast or yogurt and granola. That way he wouldn't look entirely suspicious to his family. At first he was debating which was the best to eat. Deciding that he should just eat the yogurt and granola. Feeling it wouldn't be better than eating a few slices of bread.

Even if it had butter on it.

As Bo felt that everyone would think he was sick. Sure, he sort of felt that he was overthinking things. But he really couldn't help himself about this. After all he was by himself for the moment in a quiet house. Everyone else was peacefully sleeping and unaware of everything. And he was just alone with his thoughts.

His poisonous, cruel, and liked to kick him hwne he was down thoughts.

And he absolutely despised each of them. Loathing them as they popped up in his head. Nothing was making them stop and he hated that. No matter how hard he tried to shove them away.

They would shove at him back harder then he could.

It was hard for Bo to fully understand. Some part of him didn't want to. Just wanted to keep himself completely in the dark. Like a lot of things in his life. Just bury it under everything and never touch it again.

If at all possible.

And Bo wasn't entirely sure if it would work this time around. His thoughts were a lot stronger then they normally were. Which was becoming really terrifying for him in the moment.

Doing his best to not linger on them, Bo realized he was in the kitchen. That he also wasn't alone in the kitchen. And that his Grandpa was standing in front of the stove. From the smell of things, he was making his famous scrambled eggs. Something that should be making his mouth water. It had sometime last month when he visited his Grandpa in his home.

Bo had even eaten two helpings of them like a ravenous bear.

Right now though? He didn't want any of Wayne's scrambled eggs. Sure, he felt that they smelled really delicious. And that they would be so good to eat. Definitely would be as tasty as the last time that he had them. If he were feeling any hunger, his stomach probably would be growling at the moment. And in that second, he wished that his stomach would.

Wished that he could just be his normal self.

"That smells really good, Grandpa. What'cha making?",Bo asked. Nearly giggling when his Grandpa jumped a little bit. It was almost funny. But he resisted the urge to let himself laugh at him. Knowing full well that he was going to lecture him for it. Wayne turned to him with a small stern smile on his face. Holding up the spatula as he mock scolded,"Bo how many times have I told you to not sneak up on me like that?"

"You could've given your poor old Grampa a heart-attack. But because it's your birthday, I'm going to allow it.",he added. Laughing a little as he went back to fixing the eggs on the pan. And for the longest second, Bo couldn't breathe. Waid? Did he hear his Grandpa right? Today was his birthday? It wasn't going to be tomorrow? Calmly, or as calmly as he could, Bo asked,"Oh? Today's my birthday?"

"I thought it wasn't until like tomorrow.",Bo continued. How did he lose track of time so freaking easily? It wasn't like his birthday was out of the blue. And that meant he had really no time left to get rid of Hawthorne. That they were going to be leaving after this. And this terrified him as he stood there. Doing his best to not allow it to show on his face. Wayne answered,"Yeah, it is. I thought you would be more excited about this."

"Are you feeling alright, Sweetheart?",his Grandpa asked. Moving the frying pan off the burner it was on as carefully as possible. Setting the spatula onto the side on a nearby napkin. Walking up to Bo, he raised an eyebrow as he stared at him. Looking like he was considering taking the younger man to the hospital. Carefully, he placed the back of his hand against his Grandson's forehead. Holding it there as he checked Bo's temperature. It was silly, overprotective, and kind of weird. But he was going to allow his Grandpa to do it. Bo answered,"Yeah, I'm okay. Guess my days have been blending together more than I thought."

"I haven't really been looking at the calendar as closely as I should have.",he stated. Not wanting to alert his Grandpa that he wasn't right. That things were happening to him that were beyond either of their comprehension. Besides it wasn't a total lie. After all, he wasn't looking at the calendar all that closely. Bo just prayed to anything that was listening that they would give him mercy.

And someone seemed to have been listening as his Grandpa nodded.

"Alright, honey. But if you need anything you just tell me, okay?",Wayne asked. His Grandpa finally moved his hand away when Bo nodded his head. Agreeing to tell him if something was wrong or not. And of course he agreed to his Grandpa's terms. Even if he wasn't going to actually tell the older man or not. He would pretend he was going to to soothe his Grandpa's fears. With that, Wayne pulled his Grandson closer to him. Pressing Bo's face into his shoulder as gently as possible. In a calm voice, he informed,"I love you so much, Bo. And I want you to know that I'm here if you need anything at all."

"Thank you, Grandpa. You're the best.",Bo complimented. Of course he knew that his Grandpa loved him. And that he cared about him as well. For the briefest second, he wondered why the older man was saying this for. Then realized he was probably worried about him. And that this was just how his Grandpa always shown it. Even if he never really thought it over. Softly, he asked,"Can I have some scrambled eggs? I'm so starving."

"Sure, Honey. I'll get right on that.",Wayne answered. Grinning widely as he let go of his Grandson. Backing away to continue to make their breakfast. And put everything right back to where they had been. Quickly putting everything back to the way they had been. While his Grandpa worked on making them the scrambled eggs, he set the table. Putting two plates out for them. Along with forks and napkins that he really liked the look of.

He felt it was fair as his Grandpa seemed to be making enough for three people. And he guessed he was betting that the birthday boy wanted more than one helping. Which, in any other circumstance he probably would have done so. In fact, he would be super excited to be eating it. Like last month. But right now he just felt that this was just food. Nothing really special or even all that appetizing either. Bo wasn't going to refuse to eat a second helping thought. If he did, he knew that his Grandpa was going to talk with his Mother. Tell her what he had witnessed, then make him get into her car to go to the hospital.

"So is there anything special you want for dinner?",Wayne asked. That was something that Bo hadn't thought of. As he hadn't really been feeling anything at all. Like even if he were to eat something it wouldn't be anything his Grandpa wanted. Or would be comfortable with eating, either. Every thought he had was about the woman from earlier. What was going to happen to him once her body was found.

"I was thinking we could just have your burgers.",Bo answered. And Lord that sort of sounded disgusting in his book. His new mindset added a strange subtext to the words. Stuff that he didn't really like either. As he wasn't interested in eating his elderly Grandpa. No matter what the strange thoughts going through his mind said to him. The idea seemed to be fine with his Grandpa. Who nodded his head as he agreed,"Well, we definitely got the right stuff for it."

"So burgers with those fat potato wedges that you call fries?",Wayne questioned. Those potato wedges his Grandpa joked about were fries to him. They weren't entirely that thick or too thin either. In his book they were the right thickness for dipping in ketchup or mayo. Or the combination of the two. But he knew that they were an acquired taste. Instead of acting upset about it, he nodded his head in agreement. Then he stated,"Yeah, with the fat potato wedges that I call fries."

"I can make them while you grill?",Bo offered. It only felt fair in his mind that he do that. After all, he was doing most of the work for his birthday dinner. Why not help him out with some of it? Wayne answered,"No, Bo. It's your birthday and you should have to do any work."

"I can make those along with the burgers.",he added. That generally was the rule for every birthday. The birthday boy or girl didn't work during it. And that everyone else did things for them. Like making them their favorite dinner or something. Which was something that he did for his Mom two months ago. Along with what they did for his Grandpa six months before that. The both of them just sat off to the side and relaxed when it was their birthday. But Bo didn't really like doing that on his birthday. Sitting and doing absolutely nothing for a few hours.

"I know, but I don't like doing nothing.",he explained. A second later, Wayne was plating their scrambled eggs with a small smile. He gave Bo his portion first. Bo added,"I just want to help out."

"Alright but if you change your mind about this, tell me.",Wayne instructed. Which Bo agreed to with a tiny nod of his head. Of course, he wasn't actually going to do that. He was going to suck it up and help him out with the whole thing. Wayne made sure his Grandson's portion was the biggest. Which, at any other moment in time, Bo would have been really happy. As these were one of his favorite foods in the world. And he loved it when his Grandpa spoiled him like this.

Right now, he wasn't too sure if his stomach could handle it. As it was just not working like normal.

The food from last night hadn't hurt him. Though it was meat. Sure there were non-meat items with it. But there was meat that he could power through with. This was eggs. Who knew how they would react in his stomach. If they were going to just sit there until he ate...he wasn't going to think about that either. The organ that he hid in his duffle bag. No, he wouldn't allow himself. Nor would he act sick once they started eating the eggs.

Fuck, that wouldn't be good at all.

Instead of lingering on this, he thanked his Grandpa. Waiting for the older man to sit down and eat. Watching him move the pan and spatula to the sink. Setting them in to deal with them later. Then coming back over to the kitchen table and joining Bo. He picked up his fork as his Grandpa did a second later. Carefully waiting for his Grandpa to eat first. Thinking that it would keep him properly distracted. From noticing that he wasn't eating as enthusiastically as he normally had.

That he wasn't hungry in the slightest bit either.

Soon as his Grandpa took a bit, he did too. Keeping a slow pace as he did so. And trying to seem normal about it for once. Trying to not worry his probably worried Grandpa. Both of them ate in relative silence. Aside from the sound of their utensils on their plates. And the sound of them chewing.

It was pretty much silent in the kitchen.

Halfway through eating their breakfast, his Mom came into the kitchen. She blearily walked into the kitchen. Yawning loudly as she rubbed at her sleepy eyes. The second she spotted her son, she walked right over to him. A huge tired grin on her face as she did so. Wrapping her arms gently around his neck as she did so. Kissing his temple before she chirped,"Happy birthday, baby!"

"I can't believe that you're already twenty-five already!",she added. Nuzzling his cheek as she did that. Giving him a tight squeeze along with another temple kiss. Then she let go of him as she stood up straight. Heading over to the coffee maker as Bo stated,"Thanks, Mom."

"Do you want your presents now or later?",his Mom asked. It would be nice having some of his gifts right then. As he wanted to just distract himself from everything going on. Act like something was normal. Even though they normally did gift opening after they ate cake. It was something his Mom started when Dad was around.

That was another thing Bo didn't want to linger on. It was in the past like everything else. So he wasn't going to allow himself those thoughts. Instead, he answered,"I would rather open presents after we eat cake."

"Like we always do.",Bo continued. A normal tradition that could keep him grounded in the moment. Something that he desperately wanted. Keep his mind off of everything that had been happening. Deal with his issues later on...well maybe after his birthday and before they had to leave. As he wasn't entirely sure how to deal with the Hawthorne issue. Though that was something he was going to deal with later. This seemed to please Eleanore as she nodded her head in agreement.

Moving to the coffee pot and getting it started.

Bo wondered what the rest of the day was going to bring. If it was going to be easy or not. Or if Hawthorne was going to crash his party and ruin the...oh God, he didn't want to think of Hawthorne. Things were going to be fine. The party was only going to be the three of them. Having his favorite dinner, eating cake, and opening the presents all of them got him. No matter what he had to do to make that happen. His birthday was going to be normal.