Rising Up

Grade school in China was difficult for Aili, as her family were impoverished and not respected by the other families.

Her father worked hard every day, buying and selling at the local fish markets, but barely made enough each day for them to eat. He moved from a small village to the city of Guangzhou as a young man, trying to provide for his family; but his dreams of making it big never materialized, as he slaved each day just to survive.

Aili had to wear, her male cousin’s hand me down clothes as they couldn't afford new clothes, and the neighbourhood kids always made fun of her and called her an "Ugly Boy."

The only new clothes she had were the uniforms provided by the school.

The kids at school, knowing her family was poor, teased her constantly, calling her,

"Dirty little girl boy," and asking, “Did your stinky father wash this month?”

One day, close to the end of her last grade school year, some of the worst kids pushed her around the schoolyard and called her names when something surprising happened.

The boy that all the other kids were afraid of ran up and started pushing the bullies to the ground. He was yelling at them to leave her alone, getting angrier by the second. The bullies knew who this boy was and apologized to him, as they quickly moved away from her.

He helped her from the ground, asking if she was ok, and introduced himself.

That was the day that she met her future husband, Fan Zhang.

Aili and Fan became friends and started to date when they entered high school. She told her mother about the boy after a few weeks of dating, because Fan wanted her to go to his family home and meet his parents. Aili felt that Fan loved her and was excited to tell her mother, expecting her mother to be happy for her.

Her mother, concerned that she had not met the boy, asked Aili,

"Who is this boy, have I met him?"

Aili thinking her mother would be proud, said, "His name is Fan Zhang, and he is the first son of the Zhang family."

Aili's mother looked at her daughter with fear and asked, "Do you mean the Zhang family that owns the machine factory?"

"Yes, and Fan says that one day he will own it all as he is the number one son," Aili replied, not understanding why her mother looked upset.

Aili's mother loved her daughter and wanted happiness for her, but knew her husband would disapprove of Aili seeing a member of the Zhang family.

She explained to Aili that her father would be upset if he knew and told her,

"You cannot tell your father, at least not yet. Promise me, Aili."

Although she didn't like the idea, Aili agreed with her mother and promised not to tell her father.

Aili’s father heard she was dating the Zhang boy a few weeks later, from the shop owner down the street from the school, and was not happy. He respected Aili’s decisions on most things as she was a smart girl and a kind and loving daughter. But this time, he had to put his foot down as he knew the Zhang family was powerful and had seen how they treated their enemies.

When she arrived home from school that day, her father sat her down and forbade her from seeing the Zhang boy anymore. "You have to stop seeing this boy, Aili. I know the family well, and they can be dangerous. Do you understand me?"

Aili could not understand this and complained, "But father, I have met the family, and they treated me kindly, and with respect, I don't understand."

Her father's face turned red, and he raised his voice, "What? You have been to the Zhang house. Listen to me carefully; you are not to see that boy again. Do I make myself clear?"

Seeing how upset he was but knowing she was in love with Fan, she lied to her father and said she would never see him again. Lying to her father was difficult for Aili, as she loved and respected him immensely.

The next day she spoke to Fan about what her father had said.

He seemed a little angry when he told her,

"Don't worry, I’ll fix this; everything will be ok."

Several days later, a man showed up at their house and asked to speak with her father. Her father and the man spoke outside for several minutes, and Aili could see them shake hands before her father came back inside. He was shaking his head and smiling as he sat at the dinner table. Her mom, standing beside Aili, asked him what was happening.

He smiled at them both, looked at Aili and said,

“I think our fortunes are changing. That was the foreman from the Zhang Machine Factory; he offered me a good-paying job at the factory."

Four years later, Aili and Fan were married, and a year after that their daughter, Mai-Ling, was born.

******

Fan never felt any respect from his father. His father's respect was reserved for Fan's older sister, Carolina, which made him feel nothing but resentment for her. His sister, the darling of the family, could do no wrong while he could do no right. He could not understand why he, as the only son, was not the favoured one, and with each passing year, his anger grew stronger.

At a young age, he realized that his family was the most powerful and feared in Guangzhou and often used it to his advantage. He would use his family name as a threat to get whatever he wanted for free, which led to a severe beating from his father when he was a teenager.

His father had called him a stupid little boy and had brought shame to the family name.

He asked Fan why he could not be more like his sister: who was looked up to and respected by the community while he was looked down on and laughed at behind his back.

The final straw came on the day of Fan's marriage to Aili. His sister showed up at the wedding dressed in an elaborate white dress that would outshine his brides, and this utter disrespect incensed Fan to tears. He could not believe that his sister would do this to him, and worse, his mother did nothing to stop it.

He complained to his mother, but she laughed it off and said, "Calm down, Fan. Why must everything be about you?"

"About me? Of course, it's about me. Today is my wedding day."

"This is not about you," she said, "This is about this family, not about you and your poor little bride." "Your father is making an important announcement at the wedding and wants your sister to look her best. So do not make a scene and risk his anger."

Watching Aili walk down the aisle towards him and staring at his sister, as she walked past, he felt disrespected again by his family. He could hear people whisper about his sister's dress and the disrespect she was showing, as Aili approached him. This was supposed to be the happiest moment of his life, but his anger would not leave all through the ceremony. When the ceremony had ended, and he and Aili walked back down the aisle, Fan glared at his sister, with hatred that had been building for years.

The disrespect kept piling up at the receiving line when his mother ignored Aili's parents, and his father was too busy on a phone call to join them.

After suffering the embarrassment of people asking why his father wasn't at the receiving line, for the whole time, Fan had enough and sat at the head table, drinking "Baijiu" and fuming in anger.

After having a few drinks, Aili asked him to stop as it would upset his father, but this made Fan feel even more upset with his family and their antics.

When everybody was seated, and the toasts began, Fan noticed that his sister was not in her reserved seat beside their father. Fan's best friend, the first to speak, told funny stories about Fan and their adventures together and had everybody laughing. Even Fan laughed at some of the memories, feeling a little better until his father stepped up to make his toast.

His father stepped to the microphone, raised his glass and said, "Congratulations to Fan and Aili; hopefully, they can have a happy life together."

Then he took a drink and told the crowd that he had an important announcement to make. "Today is a great day for the Zhang family. I want to let all our friends gathered here today know that significant changes are coming for the Zhang family and our business. We are in negotiations to merge with one of the wealthiest and most influential families in China, and my daughter, Carolina, the pride of my life, is leading the merger."

Fan watched with anger and disbelieve as his father continued, "not only will the businesses merge, but the families will also merge as Carolina will be marrying the first son of the Wang family."

He told everybody how proud he was of his daughter as she walked towards him, dressed like a princess and smiling at her brother.

Fan's father had never asked him to be involved in the family business in any way, and Aili could see the devastation on his face as he stared at his father and sister, accepting congratulations from the guests at their wedding.

For the next year before their daughter was born, Fan had very rarely spoken to his family, as he had resigned himself to the fact that he would never be anything to them. They moved into a small apartment in a newer area of the city, where the people around them knew and feared Fan because of his family. He gladly used his family name whenever he wanted or needed anything. He introduced himself to all the shop owners in the area and let them know who his wife was and made it clear that Aili was to be treated with the respect that his family demanded.

Aili sensed that the shopkeepers feared her husband, as they would never let her pay for anything and asked Fan about the way the people in the neighbourhood treated her. He told her that it was because they wanted to show respect to his father, but Aili knew it was because they feared Fan.

When Mai-Ling was born, Fan’s family held a small party and welcomed her into the family before his father had taken Fan aside and drunkenly chastised him for not marrying better. Fan had too much to drink that day and told his father that he didn’t care what he thought of anything, especially his choice of a wife. It turned into a shouting match between Fan and his father before Fan, in a fit of drunken anger, pushed his father and told him to never come near his granddaughter again. Fan’s mother started screaming at him, telling him that he was a disgrace to the family and would never amount to anything.

Fan ordered Aili to get the baby ready, and told his mother that he hated her, before they left the party with Fan smashing his drink glass on the floor as they walked out.

For the next five years, Fan never knew that Aili would meet with his parents once or twice a year so they could see their granddaughter. Aili felt that Mai-Ling should know her grandparents as they were her family as much as Aili's parents were. Her parents raised her to believe strongly in the ties of family and to understand that time heals all wounds, even wounds that cut deep.

Fan spoke to his family only once, after the fight, telling them he was moving to Canada and his father said “good for you, have a good life,” and deposited $50,000 into Fan's bank account.

When Fan questioned his father about the money, he said, “It is for my granddaughter; that is all you will be getting, so make it work and grow for you. Maybe you can show me you are worth it,” before hanging up the phone.

Fan left China with his heart broken and full of hatred for his family, and didn't speak to them for many years, after arriving in Canada.

The happiest day of Fan's life wasn't the day he married Aili or the day Mai-Ling was born. It was the day that his father phoned him and asked him to come to China as he needed him there.

Fan told his father that he had no interest in going to China or helping him in any way. He said, "I’ll never work for my sister, she’s a vile person, and I don't care if I ever see her again."

Fan’s father said that he needed him to help with the company, as his sister had screwed up and hurt their business badly.

He said that she was stupid and let another company somehow take control of several of the ports in southern China that the Zhang family had controlled for decades.

Fan felt joyous when he heard the news of her stupidity and that she would no longer be involved with the company. He told his father that he had to talk with his wife and make arrangements to travel to Guangzhou and would get back to him with the travel details in a couple of days.

Fan smiled and hung up the phone as he relished in the fact of his sister's downfall.

*****

Mai-Ling was born in Guangzhou, China, and immigrated to Canada with her parents when she was five years old. Her parents had used all of their savings to move to St' John's and open a small restaurant.

They choose Newfoundland because it was much easier to be accepted for business immigration than in the bigger cities, like Toronto. They stressed on Mai Ling, from a young age, that they had risked everything to come here and provide a better life for her. They told her they would have to work hard every day at the restaurant, to provide everything she would need to succeed in life. It would be her job to work hard every day on her schooling. They expected her to be the best in her class in every subject, anything less than an "A" would be unacceptable.

Nine years later, Mai-Ling entered high school at the top of her class, with awards in several subjects.

She loved reading and devoured several books a month, outside of her schoolwork. By the age of fourteen, she’d read several of the classics, along with countless lesser-known novels. Her teachers loved her and thought that she was the best student they ever had. She was always polite and caring to her teachers and peers.

From the outside, it looked like she was an extremely happy and devoted young girl but on the inside, she was fighting a terrible battle between her heart and her mind. Her parents expected her to become a doctor or lawyer, but her heart wanted to work in literature.

Entering high school, she told her parents that she wanted to pursue a career in writing and teaching literature. To say her father took this badly would be an understatement as he was livid and started stomping around the house yelling in Chinese at both her and her mother. How dare she not do what her father wished after he worked so hard and sacrificed so much for her? He said these things to her mother, blaming her mother for her daughter's poor and stupid decisions.

"This is your fault, encouraging her to read all those stupid books that won't help improve our standing," he screamed at her mother.

He directed his anger at her mother, which he did whenever he was mad at Mai Ling.

Her parents were so happy together when they started their new lives in Canada, but as the years of hard work wore on them, their happiness together faded. Her father seemed to age a lot during these years, and resented her mother for pushing him to leave China.

He wasn't always like this; he’d been a happy man who loved nothing more than spending time with his daughter when she was younger.

Her father, Fan Zhang, and mother, Aili Zhou, met in grade school, in Guangzhou, China.

They were married shortly after graduating High school, and less than a year later, their daughter, Mai-Ling Zhang, was born. When the family moved to Canada and opened the restaurant, her father started using the name Dan, as he thought it would sound more Canadian. He wanted her mother to use a different name also, but her name “Aili” pronounced “Ally,” already sounded Canadian.

Her father’s family name, Zhang, was well known in Guangzhou. Her Grandfather had built a thriving manufacturing business from nothing, and was known to get what he wanted, one way or another.

In Guangzhou, the Zhang family were respected and feared.

Mai Ling, distraught, went to her room as her parents continued to fight in the kitchen.

An hour later, Mai-ling heard the yelling stop and front door slam. Her mother came to her room in tears and told her, "He’s gone and will be sleeping at the restaurant."

Mai Ling, feeling shocked because her father had never left them alone at night, said, "Why?" "Why would he leave us alone?"

Her mother replied, "It wasn't his decision to leave honey; I told him to leave."

This shocked her more than her father leaving, as she had never seen her mother go against his wishes or stand up to him.

They spent the next few hours sitting on Mai Ling's bed and talking until they fell asleep.

Over the next few years, as Mai Ling was working through high school with honours, her parents seemed to be growing farther apart. They never fought like that night again, all through her high school years.

That is, until a few nights before her graduation, when Mai Ling and her mother informed him that she had applied for University as a Contemporary Literature student. He screamed something at her mother in a Chinese dialect that Mai Ling didn't understand, but made her mother cry. He lowered his voice, repeated the same thing close to her mother's face, then stood up and walked out the door.

A few days later Mai Ling was informed that her father would be going to China for a few months to visit with his family.

****

Aili's husband returned to China a few days after the fight, without visiting them before leaving.

He phoned Aili the day he was going, and told her that his father needed him in Guangzhou, and he was leaving in a few hours.

Aili protested, "what about Mai-Ling?"

He said, "what about her; she’s not a child."

Aili was getting angry and said, "She’s your daughter and loves you. Why would you hurt her this way?"

Fan raised his voice and said, "How dare you question me, I’m your husband. My daughter is a Zhang and will understand that my decisions as her father are final. She knows the importance of the Zhang family name and the respect it demands. Your family name means nothing; you’re a family of useless men that can't even provide food and clothing to their dirty children. Your name is the laughing stock of Guangzhou."

Aili, feeling punched in the stomach from his words and angry at the disrespect he showed her family, raised her voice, "Why would you speak to me like that? What have I done that makes you treat to me with such disrespect? I know we’ve had our problems, Fan, but you know I’ve always loved you."

He yelled, "You are my wife, I will speak to you as I feel. It's not me you love; it's my name. Remember what you were when I met you."

Aili felt her heart break when he continued with venom in his voice, "The little ugly girl boy, with the stinky father," and hung up the phone.

After the phone call, Aili collapsed at the table in shock, transported back to her childhood and the bullying she endured, feeling gutted by Fan's words.

She sat there for a long time, thinking about what Fan had said before taking a shower and changing her clothes before Mai-Ling arrived home.

When Mai-Ling came in, Aili was in the kitchen making dinner, and she could see that her mother had been crying.

She went to her and asked, "What's wrong mom, was dad here?"

Lately, her father had been mean whenever speaking to her mother and this upset her.

She was starting to resent him, as her mother was a kind and thoughtful person, and she couldn't understand why he treated her like this.

They sat at the table together, and Aili told her that her father had called earlier today.

She asked her mother why he had called, and she said that he had to fly back to Guangzhou today.

Mai-Ling asked her mother, "Is he coming here first?"

Aili replied, "No, he couldn't; your grandfather is having some trouble and demanded he come right away."

Aili thought this news would upset her, but Mei-Ling looked relieved when told that her father was not coming.

Mai-Ling smiling said, "It’s ok mom, it will be just you and I for now. It's always more comfortable when it is just the two of us, anyway. I’m not upset; I'm happy."

As they stood to make dinner together, Mai-Ling hugged her mother tight and told her how much she loved her.

When Mai Ling entered University that fall, her father had still not returned.

******