Wet Dreamz

"I wrote back and said "of course I had sex before

Knowin' I was frontin'

I said I was like a pro baby

Knowing I was stuntin'

But if I told the truth I knew I'd get played out son..."

Every teenage boy during the time this came out could relate to these lyrics like they wrote it themselves.

J Cole is one of the G.O.A.T.'s (Greatest Of All Time) and I know what you're thinking. How can he actually be "one of" if that term is a singular phrase? We've realized he's not the only one on this particular throne that has achieved this label from making a societal impact. I can name a few others that I'd put in the same sentence but this won't be necessary to get into...you all got the point 👍🏽.

When I was in high school, I was a 3-sport athlete (football, basketball, track). From just learning this, I'm sure you've gathered the idea that I was a "super jock", and you're not entirely wrong about this observation. As a former jock, we all knew that we had to keep up a certain reputation and that being how we could get the ladies.

Never in a million years would I have thought my definition of what a true man is could change drastically. This just goes to show you that evolution is a real concept because I swear my definition was as shallow as a kiddie pool.

Anyone that knew me back then knew that I had a lot of girls around me and, yes, part of it was my status. But, I believe I've always had a certain magnetic vibe that the ladies couldn't ignore. I was scoring their love for me especially when I joined the choir during the second half of my high school career. This was when they officially found out the other side to me, the side of being a musician.

Behind closed doors, though, I was most times too shy to make that next move even though I basically had my work cut out for me. I didn't possess the confidence that many people assumed I had.

Now, this doesn't mean that I didn't eventually end up losing my virginity while I was in high school. Like many of us young bucks in those days, we didn't let ANYBODY know many of us were really virgins.

What was I afraid of? Till this day, I couldn't give you a straight-to-the-point type of answer. I had so many options but no game. I was just that down-to-earth dude with a magnetic vibe but didn't know what to do with it. So I just let people ride with their assumptions of who I've been in bed with but would neither confirm nor deny it.

Let this be an example of the unnecessary pressures we put on our boys as they're growing up that what defines them is the amount of bodies they can achieve.

When a guy hasn't had sex by a certain age/time period, they're considered to be gay. The shallowness we've allowed ourselves to succumb to still blows my mind but this is again speaking from the IMMENSELY mature version of myself.

I'm thankful for tracks like these that resonate with you over time, so you begin to appreciate the subliminal messaging conveyed in them.

When I have a son, I'm going to tell him that it's cool to wait until you're TRULY ready to go that next step with a young woman. He'll understand that sex is a beautiful human expression, but it comes with great responsibility at the same time.

If there's a young boy reading this, your security in your manhood doesn't come from telling the homies that you've had a million bodies. Instead, challenge yourself and your people to achieve short/long term individual goals, then keep each other accountable at all times.

That's all folks 👊🏽!