satire

Music industry and celebrity satire presented by Beat.

Parchment. Honorable Mention in Harmonic Verses Challenge.
Chimes Call to me Chimes Sing to me Chimes Tell me to go To search To learn - All that’s left Of what once was Is rubble and metal and bones
By Emily McGuff2 years ago in Beat
Letters to Mom
Im still singing at the top of my lungs Still making up songs and how they aught to be sung Still trying to live in the past trying desperately to make times last Im still cooking for a varied taste Still disappointed when it pretty much goes to waste Still living each day by the beach tho AZ deserts where I seek Wishing you were here with me I'm Still blaming myself for the things that I cant change Still trying to ignore the feeling of feeling just shortchanged Wishing you were here with me I'm Still wishing I could meet your ghost Still wanting to Let our hair down with a Marinellis toast Still trying to listen more than I talk Still trying to make it out on our walks Im Still wanting to travel the world Still to afraid to give it a whirl Wishing you were here with me I'll be the one refusing goodbye
By simplicity2 years ago in Beat
Block Party!
Probably the worst thing I have ever made... ▶️ PLAY THE TRACK HERE ▶️ INTRO: Oh oh oh oh oh. Oh oh oh oh oh. Oh oh oh oh oh. Ah! Oh! Oh!
By Addison Alder2 years ago in Beat
notes on anora: poetry + prose.. Content Warning.
notes on anora: some prose. this piece will explore themes and bounds of the film anora (2024). consider this your spoiler alert.
By KRR2 years ago in Beat
The Unseen Fight
In the heart of the city, two rival musicians are about to face off in a competition of their lives. The city of Eastwood had always been a place where talent collided with opportunity, but nothing ever captured the public’s attention quite like the annual "Beat Battle." It was a competition that drew aspiring musicians from all corners of the city, where the winner earned a contract with one of the most prestigious record labels in the country. This year, the battle had two competitors who were destined to change the game forever: Jayden and Mia. Jayden was a beatmaker from the underground scene, known for his raw and gritty sound that reflected his life growing up in a rough neighborhood. Mia, on the other hand, was a classically trained musician with a background in orchestration, who had recently transitioned into the hip-hop world. She brought a refined elegance to her beats, combining classical elements with modern rhythms. It was clear that both had mastered their craft, but their styles were worlds apart. As the battle drew nearer, anticipation buzzed through the air. The city was split, with fans of Jayden and Mia passionately debating who would come out on top. One musician thrives in the spotlight, while the other struggles with their inner demons. Jayden thrived in the chaos of the competition. The spotlight felt like home to him, and every drop of his beat was met with an explosion of energy from the crowd. His music was born from pain, and he wore it like a badge of honor. The rhythm of his beats reflected the streets he had grown up on—rough, unforgiving, and powerful. Mia, however, found herself struggling to keep up. Her classical training had given her a unique approach to music, but it often left her questioning her place in a world dominated by raw emotion and instinct. Each night before the competition, Mia would practice for hours, constantly doubting whether her music was good enough. Despite her technical mastery, she couldn’t shake the feeling that something was missing, that her beats lacked the raw soul that Jayden brought to the table. Her inner demons were her greatest adversary. Self-doubt, fear of failure, and the pressure to prove herself weighed heavily on her shoulders. As tensions rise, the battle for the top spot becomes more than just a performance. The night of the competition arrived, and the air in the venue was thick with anticipation. Fans packed the room, eager to witness the showdown between the two musical geniuses. Jayden stepped onto the stage first, his confidence radiating as he stood in front of the crowd. His beats pounded through the speakers, and the crowd erupted into cheers. His performance was flawless, a testament to his years of experience and his natural connection to the music. When it was Mia’s turn, she stood backstage, her hands trembling. Her heart raced as she looked out into the sea of faces, her mind clouded with doubt. Could she really compete with Jayden’s raw energy? Was her music even good enough? But as she stepped onto the stage and heard the first notes of her track begin, something clicked inside her. The blend of classical strings with modern beats came to life in ways she had never anticipated. The crowd was silent at first, mesmerized by the intricate layers of sound that filled the room. Slowly, the tension began to lift, and Mia felt her nerves melt away. She poured her heart into the music, letting go of her fear and trusting in her own unique approach. Her performance was a reflection of who she was—elegant, complex, and bold. The crowd could feel the passion in her beats, and it wasn’t long before they erupted into applause. A beat, once a source of joy, becomes the weapon that could break or build their future. As the final moments of the competition approached, the judges took their time deliberating. The decision wasn’t going to be easy, and both Jayden and Mia had proven that they were worthy of the title. However, it wasn’t just about the beats; it was about the journey each musician had taken to get there. Jayden had poured his soul into his music, and the crowd had felt that energy. But Mia had shown something different—her ability to evolve, to blend styles, and to confront her own fears through her art. In that moment, she realized that the true battle wasn’t about competing with Jayden, but about embracing who she was as an artist and trusting her instincts. When the judges finally announced the winner, it wasn’t Jayden who stood victorious—it was Mia. The crowd’s reaction was mixed, but the judges explained that while Jayden’s performance was powerful, it was Mia’s authenticity and courage to push boundaries that had truly stood out. For Mia, the victory wasn’t just about winning the title—it was about overcoming her self-doubt and proving to herself that she could create something that mattered. She had discovered that the true power of music lay not in the perfection of the notes, but in the honesty of the emotion behind them. Jayden, though disappointed, couldn’t help but respect Mia’s growth. The battle had pushed him to rethink his approach to music, and he realized that there was more to success than simply dominating the stage. The beat had become their weapon—the key to unlocking their futures. For Mia, it had built her confidence and set her on a path to greatness. For Jayden, it was a lesson that the journey to the top wasn’t always about being the loudest, but about finding your true voice.
By SHAKIB2 years ago in Beat
KENDRICK LAMAR AND THE LAST BASTION OF AMERICAN ARTISTRY . Content Warning.
It was never going to be a fair fight. The moment Kendrick Lamar was announced as the Super Bowl halftime act, the battlefield was already soaked in gasoline, waiting for a single spark. And oh, what a glorious, roaring blaze it was. Even the most curmudgeonly grandmothers—those shriveled old warhorses who spit venom at anything made after 1979—had to concede: this was pure, uncut artistry. No gimmicks. No bloated, commercialized nostalgia bait. Just a man standing before the behemoth of American excess and shoving art directly down its gullet. I was three shots deep into the game, half-invested in a bet with my boyfriend, who—ever the foolhardy optimist—had put his faith in the Eagles. He was winning that bet (for now), but I had my money on something much larger. Would Kendrick deliver? Would he transcend? Would he, in the eyes of history, be granted entry into that elusive pantheon where music, performance, and raw human energy fuse into something resembling a religious experience? By the time he hit Not Like Us, it wasn’t even a question. I watched my boyfriend pour another shot without a word, knowing he had lost. Kendrick doesn’t just win. He eradicates.
By L.K. Rolan2 years ago in Beat
I Tried to Make Money by Virtual Assisting for 20 Days
I wasn’t an expert in small business, but I had skills like answering customer service emails, doing simple graphic design in Canva, and general admin work. I knew I could learn what I didn’t know. So, I took action fast. The very next day, I ordered business cards, set up a website, and attended a local networking event.
By Owais Shahid2 years ago in Beat
Descent
I am naught but a passenger on this train. The trains arrive, and then they depart. The sun rises, and it sets. Que sera sera or whatever. .
By Matthew J. Fromm2 years ago in Beat
Goldie Lookin' Chain - A Playlist. Content Warning.
Introduction Last week I listened to two of my Goldie Lookin' Chain albums and found them still extremely silly, funny and well worth a listen.
By Mike Singleton 💜 Mikeydred 2 years ago in Beat
“Make Happy” - My Thoughts 💭 . Content Warning.
This is a previously unpublished review from 2018. “Make Happy” (2016) is Bo Burnham's comedy special streaming on Netflix. After recently seeing the humorous doco-style drama "Eighth Grade" (2018) which he both wrote and directed, I found out that Bo Burnham is also a stand-up comic/musician. "Make Happy" is by turns darkly jovial and intellectual & existential, yet certainly not for all tastes.
By Grz Colm2 years ago in Beat
Only Fans Are Finally Dead
OnlyFans: The Meteoric Rise and Inevitable Decline When OnlyFans exploded into mainstream attention in 2020, the world viewed it as the solution to two pressing issues: rampant unemployment and a safe avenue for women working in adult entertainment. At the height of the pandemic, when much of the global population was confined to their homes, the platform offered a means of earning money without stepping outside or risking the dangers associated with the adult industry.
By Muhammad Nadeem2 years ago in Beat
The Surprising Truth About Pop Music: Beyond the Beats and Lyrics. AI-Generated.
Pop music, with its catchy melodies and relatable lyrics, has dominated the music industry for decades. But beneath the surface of the catchy beats and infectious choruses lies a rich tapestry of stories, influences, and cultural significance. Let's delve into some surprising truths about pop music that you may never have known.
By Kelly Munala Brookes2 years ago in Beat