Songs About Decisive Moments

Life is filled with decisions. In fact, you might say our lives are defined by decisive moments. As the poet Robert Frost once put it, we come across two paths in the forest and have to choose one. Taking the one less chosen can make all the difference.

But choices are not always easy. When we become young adults, our first big decision is asserting our independence. Sometimes it involves conflict, as beautifully dramatised by Cat Stevens in Father and Son. Stevens sings both parts – the father urging the son to be cautious (there's always tomorrow) and the son protesting: "From the moment I could talk, I was ordered to listen/ Now there's a way and I know I have to go away."

Another fateful stop along the journey of life is choosing a mate. And in The Beautiful South's A Little Time, we see a sharp contrast between a timid suitor who says: "I need a little room/ to find myself/ I need a little space" and a decisive woman who tells him to buck up. His dithering leads her to find the "courage to call it off".

But when there is no dithering, a decisive moment for every engaged couple comes on their wedding day, captured beautifully by Shania Twain in From This Moment On.

In Hold Me, K.T. Oslin sings about the choice to end a marriage, as a woman and her husband in a stale marriage each recount how they left that morning "bound and determined" to never come back. But each do return. "Kiss me," she says. "Don't kiss like we're married, kiss me like we're lovers." The marriage is renewed once more.

Arab Strap's New Birds is the soliloquy of a man who runs into an old flame. He sees the breath between their faces as she asks "straight out if [he wants] to come and stay at her flat". He is tempted, but rejects the offer, knowing he's "done the right thing".

Sometimes, a relationship stifles your independence and marriage is the wrong path to choose. Los Angeles band Music Go Music sings of "spreading out my wings" as "the chains that bound me tight have fallen off at last". She never knew how good it felt to be Just Me.

Leaving, an abusive relationship brings up difficult choices. Savage Garden tells the story of a woman who packs up the kids in the car, "another bruise to try and hide", but "there are groceries to buy and she knows she'll have to go home". She leaves again and again staying in a cheap hotel with Two Beds and a Coffee Machine but she always goes back, unable to take that decisive final step. And, as "the years go by so fast", she wonders how she's made it through.

Then there's the question of a career. What will you do with your life? Mike Scott is pretty clear. He wants to be a builder. He's using his brains, trust, belief and dedication keeping the goal in sight, "Building the City of Light".

Ethical choices also abound. For instance, Within Temptation's Sharon den Adel declares she will "Stand My Ground" and face the truth. She doesn't say what that truth is, but her determination to surmount it resonates with conviction and power.

Nils Lofgren tells of a young boxer who takes on an older rival in a title fight. The old man falters and the crowd cries: "No Mercy!/ Put him away!" The young boxer fights back his tears and his conscience while he destroys the nearly blind old man's life.

Tumor Circus offers some dissonant and disturbing sounds that eerily set the mood as the protaganist tells of cancer in the terminal ward, and how his head throbs and his bowels burn. "I love you all," he sings. "I'm so sorry/ But someone's got to pull the plug/ Turn Off the Respirator/ Turn it off/ And let me die in peace."

Not wanting to leave the topic on such a depressing note, I'll wrap it up with an upbeat number reminding us that choices will face us all of our days, much like a game of Rock-Paper-Scissors. Norwegian band Katzenjammer says "It's your decision and no matter what you choose, you gonna live it."

The playlist

1. Father and Son - Cat Stevens

2. A Little Time – The Beautiful South

3. From This Moment On – Shania Twain

4. Hold Me – K.T. Oslin

5. New Birds – Arab Strap

6. Just Me – Music Go Music

7. Two Beds and a Coffee Machine – Savage Garden

8. Building the City of Light – Mike Scott

9. Stand My Ground – Within Temptation

10. No Mercy – Nils Lofgren

11. Turn Off the Respirator – Tumor Circus (This is a 15 minute song)

12. Katzenjammer – Rock-Paper-Scissors

Index to All My Essays at Vocal