A Teenager's Way

I was 15 years old and I was just so into myself and the little friends that I did have and didn't care what my parents thought. I had so much on my hands, so much homework, chores, family outings, and had to watch my annoying little cousins every other weekend. I had a lot on my plate as a teenager and it seemed as if I never had time for myself. I could only see my friends at school but I hated school so much in junior high that they thought it would be better for me to be homeschooled. I was all for it when it first started but then I found myself disliking it more and more. At least at school, I would be able to get out of the house and not be home all day every day of the week. Yes, I had little social life with the few friends I used to hang out with when I was in school and it was the beginning of becoming anti-social. I'm the type of girl who is shy as it is, I always did what was asked of me and was always a person to always be on point with everything. I was getting so tired of it but always went along with it. When Junior High School was over and it was time to move on to High School I was so happy that I only had 3 years left, and then I can finally make my own decisions in life. It was summertime and I finally could do whatever I wanted unless we had family plans.

There was one thing and it was music, I just loved listening to music. It was my outlet. I could lay on my bed and listen to music for hours. Before I knew It, it was dinner time. Sometimes I would just skip dinner to continue to music. I would just space out and go into my own little world. Being a teenager was very hard with all the stress that my parents put on me, chores, school, homework or just being annoyed either by my parents. I had so much anxiety as a teenager. I would be rebellious at times. Sometimes even get mad enough and start throwing my shoes at the door. I would blast my music as loud as I could. I am a millennial so I listened to cassette tapes and CDs, record music from the radio onto a cassette tape. I also had a karaoke machine that had two places for cassettes and one place to put CDs. Sometimes I would make my own mixed tapes, sometimes I would play the song and sing along with it and record it. When it came to music and I was alone, I was such a happy person and it would give me a way to let all my anxiety disappear at that present moment in time. Still to this day music is the way out of reality when I don't feel like being bothered or I want to listen to songs that I use to listen to with my grandmother. She was my everything and it helps me cope with her passing. I lay there and think of all the great times we had together.

Still, to this day music always makes things better for me even though sometimes I get a little emotional from some songs. It's a good way to get out all my emotions. Certain music or songs makes me think of different people that were in my life that have either have passed or of certain people I don't speak to anymore. Music will always be a part of my life.

The Top 10 songs that got me through my teen years:

• Hero by Mariah Carey
• Poison by Bel Biv Devo
• Twisted by Keith Sweat
• Nobody by Keith Sweat
• Please Don't Go Girl by New Kids On The Block
• You Are Not Alone by Michal Jackson
• I'm Still In Love With You by New Edition
• Weak by SWV
• Forever Your Girl by Paula Abdul
• Step By Step by New Kids On The Block