What started out as a misdiagnosis in my teens slowly turned into a nightmare. I went from an outgoing energetic person to a miserable shut in who never left the house except for work and necessities. I had no desire to be around friends and family, isolating myself from everyone except online interactions. I was on my last string of fighting off my demons before I finally asked for help from my family.
Every day we face choices that can destroy what we have worked so hard to overcome. We don't always notice them, but they are always there, standing right under our nose but just out of sight. It's possible to avoid these triggers if you have completely disassociated your addiction from your life. For some, it is a false reality that they will never face the gut-wrenching pull to pick back up their old habits.
Living with depression can be literal hell. You lose motivation to get out of bed, to eat, and to even shower. For some of us it's a sense of drowning while being able to breathe. Depression comes in waves; some days the water is calm and relaxing but the next it can be a 2 week long hurricane of emotions. Some days we don't shower, brush our teeth, or even get out of our pjs. It can even get as severe as not grocery shopping, paying bills, or calling into work/school.