I Know You

It was the flash of bright red fabric that initially caught my eye. I turned my head subconsciously to follow the flutter of movement and focused on a boy in a bright red tunic. He was standing in front of a shop on the other side of the road with his back to me. I cannot say what kept my attention fastened to him, for there was nothing unusual about his appearance nor what he was doing. His clothing was simple and of decent quality with a tasseled sash of vivid red silk tied around his waist. He had a wild mess of dark curls and olive toned skin that was hardly unusual here, but the instant I caught a glimpse of his face the world around me abruptly melted away.

I know you... I thought, but didn't understand why I would feel that. I'd never actually seen this boy before. Have I?

My feet abruptly locked themselves to the cobbled road, and I remained frozen there like a stone parting the flow of bustling strangers, unable to tear my eyes away. The general clamor of the town had fallen to a muffled roar as if from far away, and I felt nothing even when the passerby jostled and pushed me. As far as I was aware, time had slowed everything into near stillness. Only the boy, who'd suddenly appeared like a fresh breeze and a splash of color against the backdrop of the town's duller tones, remained real and moving in stark contrast.

He seemed completely unaware of my attention in turn, shifting his weight occasionally while quietly nodding to someone speaking to him.

I told myself that did not know him. Something inside screamed in argument that I did. The conflict in my head made it throb. It was impossible, this was my first time seeing this random stranger and yet... I felt as if I'd seen him a thousand times before.

Everything, from the relaxed way he clasped his arms around himself and leaned back on his heel to the way he pinched his bottom lip seemed familiar. Somehow I knew he scrunched his eyebrows together when he was deep in thought. I knew he had a kind, soothing presence and would help anyone who asked. I also knew it took a lot to push him into a bad temper, but that his fury could be intense. I recalled these things like a memory, but I couldn't remember how or why.

As all of this ran through my head in that frozen moment, a mixture of emotions full of longing and sadness slammed into me like a huge wave that could've knocked me over with its power. My chest ached so painfully that my breathing halted. My feet began to scoot forward at their own accord, leading me towards the mysterious boy like moth drawn to a flame. I started to reach out, wanting to make him turn around, to ask if he knew me too...

He shifted then as if sensing my approach, his dark eyes searching the crowded road. Heart thudding with anxiety and hope over the thought that he would see, me I raised my hand-

-And choked harshly, fingers scrabbling at the fabric yanked tight around my throat as I was abruptly yanked backwards out of the thundering path of a chariot drawn by a pair of monstrous horses with sparking hooves. Unable to catch myself as I stumbled backwards, I fell onto my backside and scraped one of my hands against the rough cobblestones.

"Foolish girl!" someone shouted at me from above.

I blinked like a befuddled owl in daylight, coughing and sneezing in the trail of dust stirred up by the chariot. I rubbed my abused throat, deafened by the town's traffic and bartering cries now that I'd been jarred back into reality.

I only had a moment to sit there, trying to relocate the boy in red again from behind multitudes of moving legs and wheels before I was hauled upright again by an iron-like grip.

"What had you so distracted to stand here in the middle of a busy road like an imbecile?!" the same voice from earlier shouted.

I was roughly turned around to face Jordan, my escort who'd grabbed me and had been yelling until now. The large guard was one of my Lady Demeter's regular entourage, but he'd been assigned to escort me to the market today. I knew my way around, and didn't need help restocking the Lady's toiletry, but the guard was a necessary precaution. Plenty of thieves and other rough sorts could be found in the market, and few had any qualms against robbing a young maid running errands for her wealthy mistress.

"Sorry, I..." I trailed absently, leaning to look around the guard's beefy arm at the other side of the street. My heart sank to see that the boy in the red tunic was no longer there.

Attempting to shake off the confusing sadness, I shook my head, unable to explain my experience to Jordan, nor the odd certainty that the boy was important to me. The grizzled guard would just call me a dimwitted girl fantasizing about a pretty face, so I shrugged at Jordan instead. "I just wasn't paying attention, thank you for helping me."

The older man grumbled, but dropped the matter and allowed me to lead again. I hurried through the rest of my errands as quickly as possible, embarrassed by my behavior and hoping to avoid later questions. I continued keep an eye out for the boy in spite of myself however, and tried to ignore my underlying disappointment when he never reappeared.

Jordan returned to his regular duties without a word once we'd returned to our Lady's estate, and I continued to the inner chambers. Like many of her maids, my own little room was adjoined to Lady Demeter's in case she needed attending at any time. However, she had guests and would be with her visitors at this hour, so nobody actually expected my presence yet.

I went to freshen up in my room as soon as I'd passed the parcel of toiletries and purse into another maid's care. I was scroungy from my earlier fall and Jordan's manhandling, and I could not offend the lady and her court by appearing in front of them with dust and grime all over my backside.

I removed my soiled clothes and took my time washing my hands and face until the water in my bowl became murky. With a small drop of precious oil, I did my best to smooth back my unruly mane of blonde curls. I would wash the chiton I'd been wearing when I have the chance. For now, I just slipped into my spare. After clasping the fabric over my shoulders with fastening brooches, I girdled my waist with a simple cord and loosely wrapped a sheer himation around myself. The delicate rectangle of fabric edged in blue and gold was for decoration rather than warmth or coverage, but my Lady liked her maids to have an ethereal look as if she were a goddess attended by nymphs.

Careful not to let the edges of my himation to drag on the floor, I hurried out to the court's kitchens. The other maids were gathering there in preparation to serve refreshments to Lady Demeter and her guests, and I would be expected to be there as well. I found them already lining up with large platters or pitchers in their arms, but the Matron waved me over to her as soon as she saw me enter the room.

"Here you are, Mara," the Matron gestured towards a bowl of soft bread rolls and a pair of tongs. "Jordan said you nearly had an accident in the market. Is there anything I should be concerned about?" she asked, her piercing blue eyes scanning me for injuries.

I'd been personally chosen and trained by the Matron to serve Lady Demeter, just like every other maid in the house. While stern, Matron was a second mother to us all--or the only mother for some. As the maid's Matron, she dressed similarly to us, but her age and richly colored himation set her apart in status.

"No, Matron," I assured her. "I was just... distracted." I blushed, thinking only briefly about telling her of the boy and my strange reaction. The more time passed, the sillier I felt for what was beginning to feel like a moment of pure madness, and I wasn't sure if I felt comfortable confiding in anyone about it now.

"Hmm." She frowned at me until I began to wonder whether she could read my thoughts like a sign on my forehead, but then she shrugged. "Well, so long as you're not hurt. Lady Demeter and her guests will be traveling to the springs tomorrow and will want your attendance," she reminded me before shooing me into the line.

"Lady Demeter has really outdone herself this spring, hasn't she?" a maid ahead of me commented over her shoulder.

I nodded in agreement, although Lady Demeter didn't actually have much to do with the courtyard's appearance beyond funding its caretakers. She was very fond of hosting gatherings underneath the open sky, and spring was always the best time for outdoor parties. The flowers happened to be exceptionally lush this year, filling every crevice of the courtyard with colors and heady fragrances. They nearly overran the decorative marble benches and tables positioned strategically to compliment the gardens. The center of the courtyard was a clear, open space for entertainers such as musicians, dancers, or actors to fill. At night, lanterns scattered throughout the gardens would be lit, increasing the courtyard's enchantment like multiple sparkling fireflies.

I tried to peek over the other maids' shoulders, but a heavy curtain obscured the entrance. No doubt, we were just waiting for it to be dramatically drawn back on Lady Demeter's cue. We were all performers really, and I was familiar with the choreography of the maids.

I shifted the wide bread bowl to try to balance it both more securely and elegantly over my shoulder. I tucked the edge of my himation over my elbow to prevent it from dragging, and waited.

I could hear the muffled sounds of Lady Demeter addressing her guests from outside, followed eventually by a short chorus of cheers. Then the curtains were drawn back, and the music started. The line of maids theatrically stepped out into the waning daylight to serve the glittering nobles who murmured in appreciation over the food and presentation.

Decorative dancers were spinning and swirling around musicians in the courtyard's center while we moved about in orderly formations from table to table. I moved automatically, my task of depositing bread simple enough to make avoiding the occasional groping hand with grace easier. Sometimes I felt like a dancer myself, dipping and side-stepping between the conversing nobles and their own servants until I lost myself in the music and the movements.

I saw Lady Demeter observing the gathering with satisfaction, looking resplendent herself in a deep red peplos strewn with golden threads and surrounded by rich jewel-like camillias. She really resembled a goddess, like her namesake, presiding over her court of mystical creatures at that moment. I couldn't help the prick of pride at being a part of the evening's magic, even if it were a small part.

Once my bowl was empty, I all but skipped into the courtyard's surrounding peristyle. The covered walkway was partially blocked by various trees and bushes, making it easy for maids to slip out of sight as needed to return to the kitchens. The shadowy peristyle wasn't exclusive to our use of course, and many nobles and servants took advantage of its shadowed niches for private chats and flirtations.

I kept my eyes down as I passed by occupied areas in an effort to maintain privacy and prevent drawing attention to myself. Maids had to be extra careful here, especially while the wine was flowing. A deep called out to me, and I saw the shape of a hand reaching for me from out of the corner of my eyes. I darted away like a startled hare, blindly throwing myself around a wide column wrapped in vines to get away, and ran bodily straight into the unsuspecting arms of a different man.

I yelped, struggling not to drop my bowl and tongs as firm hands caught my elbows, keeping me upright until I found my balance again.

"Steady on!" The tenor sound of young man's voice cautioned into my hairline, stirring the loose strands with a warm breath. "Are you all right?"

Shaking slightly from adrenaline and nerves, I nodded and stepped hurriedly back to get off of his chest. I hugged the bread bowl tightly to myself like a shield, unsure what had happened to my tongs. His hands remained steadying on my arms, however, and I forgot to be frightened as I looked up and met the dark eyes of the boy in red.

He was just a head taller than me and from up close I saw that he appeared to be as young as me, with a smooth chin and a lean build. I wasn't surprised by any of this though, because I knew his face. Somehow I knew that his dark eyes would be flecked with gold, and that his mouth would have a cupid bow shape. Even the straight edge of his nose and thick, sooty eyelashes were unbearably familiar to me. Unbearable, because I still could not recall why. Whatever connected me to this boy remained simultaneously a close and elusive memory like a dream.

Even so, the strange mixture of intense feelings of yearning returned in an overwhelming rush as I gawked dumbfounded at him. His own dark eyes widened in surprise as he stared back, and something like like recognition flickering across his face as he too suddenly became very still.

A circus of butterflies fluttered and bounced within my chest at the quick changes in his expressions.

"You-" he started faintly, sounding as if the air had been knocked out of him. His grip on my arms tightened, making the butterfly circus in me become a bone-shattering storm as he shifted closer.

My own lips parted, anticipating his response and for the things to make sense again. He knew me too and he was about to say something that would trigger my memory. I was certain of it! I just needed a small push to allow to break whatever was holding back the flood of memories that would explain why I kept feeling like this.

He didn't get the chance to say the words. Reality chose that time to interrupt us yet again. This time in the form of a bustling Matron and some unfamiliar men.

"Mara! What are you doing dawdling here, girl?" the old maid hissed sharply, adding her own grip to my arm and tug me sharply away from the boy.

His hands held tight for the briefest moment as if reluctant to let me go, but he relinquished me to Matron. The unfamiliar men were also hissing and nudging him to recall his duties, and he was suddenly swept away, taking my breath with him.

Matron marched me to the kitchen door before she shuffled off back into the peristyle muttering about frisky guests needed to keep their hands to themselves. No doubt she was making rounds like an old guard dog to make sure the other maids weren't being bothered. I was fond of her and very appreciative of her watch normally, but I did wish she'd left me alone this time.

I grabbed the next available bread bowl and hurried back out to the courtyard. It was more difficult to serve the guests without dropping the bread in their laps while my head continually spun around like an owl in search of the boy in red. After distractedly stacking a pile of rolls on the same guest's plate a couple times in a row, I resigned myself to the fact that the boy was gone. If I continued blundering around, either Matron or Lady Demeter herself would notice and throw me out in disgrace.

Huffing, I summoned the effort to get a hold of myself as the rest of the night slid by in a blur of raucous sounds and colors. My frustration had transformed the whimsical magic of the court and into a cage full of animals, and I the shackled feeder.

And yet... the feeling of anticipation and hope never quite left me, even when the night faded into the morrow.

I was up with all of the other servants long before the sun rose to load the wagons in preparation to travel to the springs. This day trip was another event that repeated every year, and the servants' procedures for it had been perfected like a well oiled mechanism. We moved with a near silent rush, so that every horse, cart, and palanquin were in place before the majority of nobles were even awake.

I then returned to Lady Demeter's chambers and quietly drew back the window covers to allow the dawn light in to wake her. The other maids would dress her and arrange her curls, but the theme for the day would be loose and natural. She and her guests would be bathing in the natural springs, so there would be no point in overdoing her overall hair and makeup only to have it ruined in the water.

Despite the work that went into it, everyone looked forward to these trips. Once we'd reached the springs and set up a picnic for the nobles, the servants would be temporarily relieved from our duties. For however long Lady Demeter and her guests chose to enjoy the springs, we were free to spend the time however we pleased so long as we remained within calling distance. This motivated us all to ensure that the Lady and her guests were promptly bundled up and delivered to the springs without any incident, but I was especially eager for this trip to go well. I always helped with the preparations in the past, but this was the first year that I'd been allowed to join.

I strode alongside the palanquin carrying Lady Demeter, unconcerned by the dust being kicked up by the wheels and animals ahead of us. The springs were hidden deep within the woods, but they were not far from town. Cool breezes continual filled the air soothingly, but I soon became sticky with sweat and humidity as I walked. Strands of my hair and my clothing clung to my skin, but I couldn't allow the discomfort to bother me too much. The environment was becoming increasingly rich with deep green trees and foliage, which filled the air with the fresh scent of earth and leaves. The rough cobblestone had softened into a dirt track that ran parallel to a trickling stream. While this wasn't great for the wagons and carts, it felt nicer underneath my thinly sandaled feet. The running water sang soothingly to the accompaniment of buzzing dragonflies and bird sounds, and sunlight dappled the area wherever it slipped through forest canopy. Something about the wild green seemed almost as familiar to me as the boy in red had. The further we walked into the woods, the more at ease I felt as if I was on my way home.

I looked back over my shoulder at the seemingly endless line of people, carts, and wagons making up the entourage, amazed that we could all fit on this slim trail. It was only then that something felt... off.

The peaceful smile that I had been wearing fell as I looked on, wondering why I felt so at home here, but not with the people I walked with. I knew many of their faces. Some of those walking or riding on the trail were people that I've worked with and learned from for my entire life. I got along with everyone generally, but right then they may as well have been strangers to me. I shook my head slowly and started to face forward once more when my eye caught the telltale flash of red.

I momentarily stopped in my tracks, blocking those behind me before I caught myself and kept walking forward. Somewhere at the fringes of the entourage, I could've sworn that I'd just caught a glimpse of the boy. It too far to fully trust my eyes, but instinct told me that I'd seen correctly even if I couldn't see him now. My heart began fluttering in my throat as if it'd grown a pair of hummingbird wings, and I promised myself to find him once we'd reached the springs. If he'd really joined the entourage, then I would find him and I would talk to him without interruption even if I had to literally throw myself into his path again!

"What are you grinning like a loon about?" one of the maids walking alongside me asked. Her mouth had an amused quirk as if she already had a guess, and perhaps her thoughts weren't far off. The maids often enjoyed talking about who they were attracted to, and I'm sure I bore the signs of the infatuated.

My face flushed, but I couldn't shake the stupid grin off my face. I shrugged and attempted to fake nonchalance. "I'm just really excited to see the springs!"

"Oh me too!" She brightened and a couple other nearby maids chorused their agreement. Thankfully they were only too happy jump on the topic, and fell into chatters about what they wanted to do once we arrived.

"Can you swim?" One of the girls asked me.

When I nodded they proceeded to insist that I join them at their favorite spot. I agreed, knowing they wouldn't notice if I slipped away.

It was clear when we'd arrived, for the forest almost dramatically opened ahead of us to reveal a large pool of crystal clear water that could've been the very spring Artemis had been spied bathing with her Nymphs. The water's smooth surface mirrored the overhanging trees and the surrounding vegetation which was littered with purple irises. Yellow butterflies fluttered among the bushes, and sapphire damsel flies skipped across the water's surface. A large gazebo entwined in wisteria vines had been built at the pool's edge with a stone ramp leading down into the water. Benches had been carved into the rock formations to blend in with the natural surroundings, but it was clear to any discerning eye that they'd been created by humans.

I could hardly breath from admiration and the ever-growing knowledge that I knew this landscape, just like I knew the boy, despite never being here before. Not in this lifetime anyway.

I followed the other maids after Lady Demeter's dismissal to a smaller pool hidden in a copse of trees. We happily peeled off our sweat-soaked tunics and our long himations, hanging everything over branches before hopping into the water. They explained that there were multiple little pools like this one scattered all over the area. The other servants and guards would likely be occupying them or the other man-made structures. Besides the large gazebo the nobles had settled in were plenty of tiny closures and swings built into the landscape for whoever's pleasure.

None of this sounded like new information however... and somehow I believed that I could find any of these pools or structures without being shown first. Wanting to test this feeling, I stayed only long enough to rinse off my travel grime. One of the maids started a water fight by playfully splashing at the rest of us. The pool quickly dissolved into turmoil of white water and giggly shrieks, and I climbed out unnoticed and half chuckling at their antics.

I decided to leave my smelly tunic on its the branch and just took my slightly drier himation instead. I loosely wrapped the sheer fabric about myself in the vague semblance of modesty. It barely hid anything to begin with, and my damp skin did nothing help. It didn't matter though, almost everyone would be naked right now. Picking up the edge of my himation, I left my flimsy sandals as well, enjoying the feel of the soft forest floor beneath my bare feet as I left the copse.

I didn't follow a path that anyone could see. Instead I allowed something within my subconscious to lead. It was quieter where I headed, without any sign of others bothering to come this way. Perhaps it wasn't safe or wise to go deeper into the wild, away from people, but it felt... right. The foliage grew thicker here, as if it'd grown without human interference for years, unlike other sections close to the springs.

I touched the rough bark on an old tree trunk that drew me, and dejavu hit me so intensely I had to lean against the tree for support. Breathing hard, I stared at the wide rockface ahead of me. It seemed like a dead end, but I knew it wasn't.

I watched the bright yellow wings of a butterfly catch sunlight as it fluttered through a nearly invisible crevice in the rock. My lips curled upwards, and I ducked to follow it through the hidden opening.

On the other side, a pool surrounded by larges stones, tiny patches of daisy fleabanes, and richly colored irises awaited. It was more overgrown than the other springs and a large tree covered in younger plants stood tall at the water's edge. A wide swing hung from one of its branches over the lip of the pool, gentle swaying in a soft breeze.

I moved forward at the same time there was a soft rustle. Looking up, I was amazed but not surprised to see the boy in the red tunic drop lightly into the clearing as if he'd just stepped of the wind. Not surprised, because I finally remembered that this was where we'd originally met.

His hopeful, questioning eyes never left mine as he came slowly around the tree to meet me.

"Zephyrus," I breathed just as he reached me, taking the hands he'd held open, and I sighed in relief as jumbled pieces inside seemed to finally fall into place. I'd been cursed to lose Zephyrus in every life, but finding him again was the only that allowed me to remember what it felt to be whole.

"You do remember me." The gold flecks in his eyes brightened like sparks of light, and he folded his fingers tightly around mine. "And I... wasn't sure if it was you at first either," he admitted. "You always look different when you're reborn."

I nodded ruefully, but I didn't care. It didn't matter right now. "You found me anyway."

Although I didn't actually recall who I was in all of my previous lives, the important bits of memory were swiftly returning now that I'd finally recognized him.

Zephyrus was the west wind, the one who heralded spring, and although I was merely human, I'd loved him before many times. I'd promised that I'd always remember him, and he'd promised to always find me.

His laugh was warm, but his face was tinged with sadness as he drew me over to the swing, helping me to sit on one side with him on the other. "The last time was... too painful," he said, looking down so that his dark hair partially shielded his expression. "Your life was too short."

Though I couldn't see it from my position, I knew that his brow was deeply furrowed and that the burnished gold flecks in his eyes would appear gray. I'd seen that same expression whenever I'd fallen ill, whenever I'd been injured, and especially whenever I had passed away.

Leaning into Zephryus's side and I looped my arms around his neck, not caring that the edges of my himation had fallen in a tangle around my bare feet to trail across the ground below. "I'm here now," I reminded him. "We're both here, and I am glad we still have this time, no matter what happens... as long as you still want it." I confessed, unable to help smiling up at him as he turned his face towards towards mine.

His mouth curled up in response, as if he couldn't help himself either. "I'd never stop looking for you," he said seriously, but his posture had relaxed once more. He curled one leg up and extended the other, pushing against the ground with his foot to swing us gently backwards. "I just don't want to watch you disappear anymore."

I was quiet for a long moment, studying his face as I thought. This wouldn't be the first time my mortality had remained a painful reminder that our time together was not only limited, but could end very abruptly with little warning. It was only too possible that some jealous god or goddess was watching and trying to ensure that I always died young. As frightening and painful my deaths could be, however, I can only imagine the pain Zephyrus went through every time he'd lost me.

"Maybe you don't have to," I said finally. "There are others who found a way, didn't they?"

"Yes," Zephyrus said after a long pause. "But rarely, and not without a lot of risk, cost, and the help of... certain gods."

I refrained from crinkling my nose. I'd also prefer avoiding making deals with Zeus if possible, but Zephysus' response only settled my resolve. "Then we'll find a way," I replied simply.

"No one may help us, Mara-" he started, his dark eyes penetrating and concerned, but then broke off, laughing at the catlike smirk I aimed up at him in response to the sound of my current name.

"We'll find a way anyway."