With Love & Compassion

If a human knew what they were doing wrong while doing it, I forgive them.

By forgiving them, I free myself and offer them what they struggle with,

Which is unconditional love and forgiveness, and a chance,

Because my death would be an example they would never forget,

And in remembering me, correctly or not, the shock of sacrifice,

Of unconquerable tranquility,

Would never make sense to a human who did wrong,

Whether they knew it at the time or not.

If they did, and they wished for forgiveness, they would have it

If they didn’t, and they didn’t wish for forgiveness,

They would be worthy of it, but never allow themselves to have it.

They harm themselves by fearing the door I left open,

Even though peace is on the other side.

But I remain a question in their mind, and therefor, immortal

Because my spirit conquered them in death,

And in taking my life, their opportunity to break me also dies,

If they are unaware, or ignorant, or forgetful,

I remain an uncomfortable anonymous pain in their subconscious.

If they did not know, I would hope they could forgive themselves,

Because if they can’t they will suffer mentally into eternity,

And to them, I will also remain,

But to me, they will be just another seed I hope the best for,

But know, the growth of it, is not mine to tend to.

Perfection is not what the word has come to mean,

Nothing is perfect, and so everything in its current state, even unstable

Is actually perfect, if it is on it’s own path.

Perfection could be just knowing that you are where you are supposed to be,

No one’s path but your own, and to feel perfect is tranquil,

But it has nothing to do with outside events, or humans outside your mind.

My mind is perfect, because my thoughts are my own.

My path is my own, and I feel confident that I am where I am supposed to be.

Do you?

I heal my myself, by offering unconditional love to my parents.

It took me a long time to see that I did not need to get that love from them to heal,

I needed to give it to them.

I became better because I treated them better than they treated me,

I think better of them, regardless of how they think of me,

But humor does help as well, allowing me to bicker about the truth,

Allowing me to be heard, and them to save face, and us to move forward.

No matter which direction you choose, there are good and bad days ahead,

Today becomes too much, so quickly when you carrying the weight of yesterday.

None of this is really for the world, it’s for me, which is why it’s so easy to say,

If my goal was to present something perfect,

In a way that was accepted and glorified by the mass,

If it left me feeling rejected and worthless if fame doesn’t follow…

Then I would never be able to write my own words.

The fear of failure would be the cause of my writer’s block.

I would be stumped by what I thought people wanted to read,

Or wanted to hear, or wanted to feel.

Because I have no control over anyones thoughts but my own,

I do have a gift for metaphors, but no desire to shape an individuals interpretation.

If I succeed as myself, my fear is that success would take me from myself,

And I do not want to become anyone else, because I like who I am, all of the time.

I like what I have become, but my path relentlessly pushes me to write,

For myself first, and possibly for the benefit of more,

I am not sure if recognition is a blessing or a curse,

I wish to remain content with what I have, and so I reflect in order to see clearly.

Knowing every pleasure and pain has numbered days.

But if life sees that I conquer all suffering, I think it would be likely that life,

Test my character with luxury,

It’s much more difficult to build strength when you are comfortable.

Like trees with no wind, they have no need for deep roots,

And so they fall by their own height,

Unprepared for the stress that they were capable of as seeds,

So tall, they fall from 100’ when someone sneezed.

So, I will do what I feel called to do, I will offer my own words, as true as I can,

As if I was sitting on stage sharing my heart the same way,

Whether the auditorium was empty, or full,

And I will sit and watch the curtain fall and smile,

Knowing I benefited one persons life at least; my own.

Knowing I am myself, knowing I’m nobody

Knowing I am invisible,

Standing naked with unconditional love and compassion for myself, and others.