Cut The Cord
Steal From Yourself- challenge entry
Steal from myself, huh? Ok. You got it, Vocal.
When I saw the new challenges drop, two of them grabbed me by the throat. This was one of them. I love taking old things and giving them new life, so this one seems right up my alley. I started digging through my notebooks and sorting out the old bones of things I never finished or shared trying to decide what exactly was worth stealing.
Then it hit me... I've already been stealing from myself for months. I'm actually prepared! That was a nice surprise.
For about six months, I've been re-working a line from a poem I wrote. The line in particular I kept was, "There is no law that says you must keep poison in your ear."
That line has been like a daily prayer for me while navigating through a lifetime of heavy family stuff... the kind that guts your fucking soul out and leaves it writhing on the floor in agony. I've been having to redraw my boundaries in fucking blood and salt to keep some demons away. The poem has served its purpose... it was a message to myself. I do not have to be disrespected and abused just to "keep the peace". But that one line... she has teeth and still had some more to say. She deserved a new spotlight.
So, I gave her one.
I put her into a song. Now she's a brand new creature with a whole new voice and an even stronger way of fighting back.
She's a little shaky walking on her little baby legs right now... but she's mine and I'm proud of her.
Cut The Cord:
Gather up the hollow words
the 'blood is thicker' lies
Pack them in a taped up box
and don't look back this time
Go find the girl called 'sister'
the one who always gave
Tell her she has worked enough
there's nothing left to save
You don't have to play their role
or be the family tool
turn it off and shut them out
you are nobody's fool
Cut the cord. Cut the noise
Cut the ties that kept you small
You don't owe them one more heartbeat
not one answer when they call
Let the silence be your armor
Let the distance set you free
Choosing peace is not betrayal
You're just choosing you finally
They used your heart as garden soil
they taught you how to bleed
You were the bank, the ear, the heart
for every selfish need
So, turn that 'give a fuck' to gray
let go of every dream
that they will ever see your worth
or hear your silent scream
Take that guilt they planted deep
and pull it by the root
You're not cruel for walking out
you're now forbidden fruit
Cut the cord. Cut the noise
Cut the ties that kept you small
You don't owe them one more heartbeat
not one answer when they call
Let the silence be your armor
Let the distance set you free
Choosing peace is not betrayal
You're just choosing you finally
Become the winter in their breath
the frost they cannot melt
indifference is the quiet throne
that rewrites how you're felt
Block the name and clear the logs
there's nothing left to fear
There is no law that says
you must keep poison in your ear
Here is the finished version freshly uploaded if you'd like to listen.
That line from the past is no longer hiding away in my notebook. She's been ripped out of her old paper grave and built into something that is fighting back. She's not a reminder of pain anymore, she's a weapon. Writing this song has helped me learn how to keep my head above water and reminded me that old things deserve a second look from wiser eyes.
About the Creator
Sara Wilson
I love Ugly Things.
I try and be active AND interactive.
I write... whatever I feel.
Sometimes it's happy.. sometimes it isn't. But it's real. And it's me.
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