I Took My First Self-Road Trip In The Pandemic

On September 8th, I started packing in advance for my first road trip. I gathered my makeup, movies, and my road trip playlist was comprised of 14 hours worth of songs. I was excited to begin a trip all by myself. To get the experience that I can have the control of my transportation, to stop at any time I wanted to. There were moments when I was a passenger that I wanted to stop and see something that caught my eye, but I couldn't do that. Now I could indulge into a little sight seeing without having to disrupt anything since I was the driver, I could have my own rules.

I would be looking forward to the sights I would see, but I also had to remind myself that this was also my first road trip in the pandemic where I couldn't leisurely get out of my car without a mask on. This sparked a problem to figure out how I could safely relieve myself.

Thinking on how I could help that problem, I made a bathroom bag that was filled with certain items : female sanitary wipes, a urinal device to help me urinate without sitting down, extra underwear, and an empty bottle in-case I had to relieve myself without leaving my car due to any crowds at rest area. I had it planned out for that precaution in the case of stopping at a rest area.

After thinking of that vital plan to help me be safe on my travels, I got to packing my leisure items.

• A Polaroid camera for any stops that had a beautiful scene to capture
• Some fancy outfits and comfy clothes
• writing books so I could stop and scribble the idea down for a future plot point to expand on

I assumed that my road trip was going to allow moments that I could stop and take in a surrounding. And ironically I didn’t get the leisure experience I thought. I was in for a rough learning experience on the road.

The Day I Left For My Road Trip

At 12:30, I finished up my manuscript pages for my second book to kill some time and I got my car packed.

I picked my song order out, I opted for songs that were relaxed to keep me calm on the road instead of hyper and loud songs that would have me revved and distracted. This is a trip that needed to be concentrated on and the songs had to be softly sounded to soothe me while I could comprehend clearly and calmly to understand what my GPS was instructing me to do.

I got my camera ready in my cup holder to turn on with my free hand without looking off the road. I knew there would be moments I wanted to talk about in that instance of how I was feeling and what the experience would be like driving on different roads.

Cell Block Tango played on the radio as I waited for my GPS to give me directions. I was heading out of my hometown to make my venture to another state all by myself.

I'll admit I wasn't worried traveling alone, I had my pepper spray, I had my pocket knife, I had toll money in-case I had a toll to pay, I had my basics covered.

I was in for a very rough experience to learn that I am going to be experiencing the expectations, but it’s different when you actually experience those expectations behind the wheel. I knew that the roads were going to be rough and different than my experiences in my own town. Where I am going to another place, where the navigation is different in pace, and you have to learn immediately what the action is going to be on the road is very critical. I already struggle with driving anxiety so having to do a immediate response on roads where you only get the decision within a blink of an eye was a lot to comprehend.

To specify where exactly I was going was a town that was above Baltimore (I will not be revealing the actual town of my destination to give privacy to the friend I was going to visit). I chose the directions on my GPS to go around Baltimore, but also meant getting one tiny little portion of Washington DC traffic. There’s no way to get to this town without some sort of passage through a very rocky part of the road. DC traffic is never going to be easy and I accept that, but it was also really rough to experience it on a Friday. Even in the pandemic it was sort of shocking to see how many people were on the road.

But I also have to point out that I find it shocking considering that I have never experienced as a driver having to navigate through busy roads on the highway like that. It’s definitely different being the passenger where there’s no anxiety of having to figure out the roads and I’m just simply the passenger but as the driver it’s an entirely different feeling on the spectrum of travel.

Before I began my travels I discussed with my grandpa if my car is suitable for the road, or if I have to rent a car that would be durable for rough roads. I was told that my car isn't the proper vehicle to be taking on long trips but it can be done as long as there is caution for my car on certain turns and potholes. It's a Nissan Cube, it's low to the ground, and it drains gas faster going 70 MPH. I had to remember this on the road, luckily the directions were mainly instructing me to make constant ventures into exits on the right lane; I could go right at the speed limits of 55 MPH or 70 MPH and wouldn't worry about having to be in the left lane to go faster, so I maintained my travels on the right lane.

However, I got a hard lesson that I can't be presumptive that the right lane would be the same all the way through, so I don't have to merge often. I had to constantly merge into the middle right lane because the right lane I was traveling on would end sooner then I thought. As mentioned a couple paragraphs earlier, decisions had to be made in the span of a second to get where I needed to be.

I was told to be weary of the commercial trucks on the road. I was behind one truck on the road and I opted to move away from so the rocks would quit hitting my windsheild. I successfully gotten over, then a few seconds after I was in my lane, the truck in-front of me also decided to get in my lane I transitioned to. Now, as I say this, this is not to antagonize or paint myself for sympathy for the reader to be on my side, but this was absolutely terrifying. The driver of the truck should have already seen with his many mirrors that I was in the lane. Despite having a small car, I should have been in vicinity to be seen in the peripheral vision. This driver started coming over, a portion of the tail end of their truck was about to knock the front hood of my car. I instinctively tried to get into the next middle lane only for there to be a car. My only option was to slow down in hopes that the person behind me would. I slowed down just enough for the truck to get into their lane and prevent the driver from obliterating the front part of my car. I quickly got back into the far right lane again, I held my hand over my mouth and just sobbed at what almost happened. I've been through two car accidents in my life, one where I was a passenger and one where I was the driver (I was rear ended, not at fault for the accident). Both of these accidents has molded my mind to be an extremely cautious driver, but it's still hard to shake the stress and be relaxed to driver. That moment haunted me for the rest of the ride.

Because this is a trip during the pandemic, I had seriously debated stopping to get something to eat, but it also meant that if I stopped somewhere I would have to be cautious if I went through a drive-thru, I might not be able to wash my hands. If I stopped at a rest stop, I had to be leery of the bathroom stalls as well as the crowds. I did pack a bag in-case I had to relieve myself in the safety of my own car, but that also meant losing time as well as the struggle to get back and have to play musical chairs with the other cars around me. I did the hardest endurance to myself, beyond limitations to my patience and resilience. I never stopped at all, no rest stops, and no food or beverages. It sounds like I'm a glutton for punishment that I deprived myself of nourishment and necessities. But I didn't want to have any factors that could contribute to stopping at a rest stop so there would be contact with a crowd so I could be able to protect myself from possible passing of the virus to my dear friend.

Now remember I said that I left at one o'clock? I left at one thinking I could get there by five o'clock, giving myself an hour for any possible stops. On the trip I ended up not making any stops for myself. My time for ETA was delayed for two reasons, a car accident and usual frustrating Friday traffic. Those two factors made my new ETA right at 6:00. So I had been driving for five hours. I was very fatigued and winded from intense focus on the road.

By the time I got to my friend's home, I was so excited despite my tiredness. I saw she was coming out of her home and walking up to greet me with a big smile and a welcoming embrace. I couldn't function properly and forgot all the usual steps like : Turn your car off, find your car keys, shut your door. By the time she got to my car, I finally cut my car off and just fell into her hug. I'm pretty sure she was keeping me standing since that was the first time my legs were standing in five hours.

After three glorious days of having some safe, social distancing shenanigans with my close friend, it was time to go. I had dreaded the tread back on the road since the day I arrived.

The night before I left trailing into the morning I had to leave, my mind and all the functions in my body was in a state of stress and restlessness from the mix of emotions from sadness to stress. I kept waking up almost every hour which made the morning of my departure very rough.

I woke up earlier then my friend at 5:45, I opted to be smart and drink a glass of water to at least calm my stomach. I was already dehydrated due to the crying from the night before. I figured I'd do my stomach a favor and try to drink something plain and refreshing to help my system.

I left at 7:00 in the morning, I felt sick to my stomach and I felt like I was going to throw up a couple times, I had worried if I was going to be able to be calm and take on the rough road again. To go all the way without stopping again. Heading out onto the road, I felt as if I was in a haze from the lack of sleep and the sadness from having to leave.

I could only describe my morning state as: too tired from emotions that had me weary, but too wired to be awake. That deprived energy feeling was not how I wanted to start my four hour drive back to my hometown in Virginia.

I started getting some pep back in my psyche after the first hour and half of navigating back home. It was hard, but because of having the familiarity of the fast decisions, I was able to access my decisions faster to remember what to do: Stick to the middle right lane, push through the traffic, and you'll be fine.

When I had an hour and fifteen minutes left on my time span for the GPS, I knew I was back in Virginia, I didn't have to see the "Welcome to Virginia" sign to know I was almost home. I could recognize the roads and woods to know I was on Virginia interstate.

As soon as I got home, I did a good shrill scream of triumph in my car. When I got out of my car and got my feet acclimated with land again, my grandpa opened the door and came to welcome me back, I felt like I was walking like a newborn horse because I was willing my legs to work to go hug my grandpa.

So overall, my first road trip was very hard, but it was a learning experience of this variety with the critical nature that I had to endure and remember. My next road trip might be a bit easier on my stomach so I won't feel that I have to deprive myself of food to prevent myself to get sick off of my own stress. The next trip might be when the pandemic has calmed down, making the rest stops possible to stop at for resting and relieving. I may end up having a road trip buddy that can take over in case something happens or helps me navigate so I don't have to constantly yell at my GPS.

As much as I wanted to have the leisure part of the road trip to make it feel more like a road trip, I'm glad it was this way. Before I have any moments I can be able to stop and look at something, I should be aware of how hectic the roads might be, and if it's a familiar trail that I know to navigate then I can be able to indulge in a sight or two.

If you are planning a road trip; either by yourself or with some pals. Here are some things to check on or ask.

• Ask questions to your host about any alternative routes, that's what my friend did for me, she gave me numerous options. Whenever she drove me around she pointed out certain exits to take and to be aware of certain roads.
• If you have some problems with getting your stomach to settle with driving anxiety, be sure to have some antacids to chew or some swigs of some Pepto Bismal. Chewing on an antacid isn't exactly something of sustenance, but it was something that helped me when I needed something to help quell my queasy stomach.
• If you are planning on going all the way through without stopping, purchasing a backrest for your driver's seat would be a good investment. I wish I had done that and now I feel like Quasimodo from The Hunchback of Notre Dame
• Have an item that can help calm you down like a fidget spinner or a stressball, the first times I drove through a city I didn't know, I had a stuffed animal that I could have in my lap to clench in the moments my stress almost tore me into two pieces.

Just be prepared for rough roads, and that you might be yelling at your GPS for hours.