101 things you learn from living in New Orleans

1. Stop to smell the jasmine

2. An umbrella & extra socks are always a good idea

3. Roaches can fly

4. Don't just exist - learn to LIVE

5. Always look out for new potholes

6. Only eat raw oysters during months that have an "R" in them (September - April)

7. People are people - no matter their race, religion or beliefs

8. Air conditioning can save your life

9. Where you got 'dem shoes

10. It's ok to park in the neutral ground if it's been raining for more than 3 hours

11. How to hold your liquor

12. You don't have to show your boobs to get beads

13. And only tourists wear beads out of season

14. Don't wear open toed shoes in the French Quarter

15. Snowballs & snowcones are NOT the same thing

16. Never eat at a chain restaurant

17. Talk to your neighbors

18. Talk to the folks sitting next to you on the streetcar

19. Talk to the cashier at Rouse's

20. Actually look at people & talk to them for pete's sake

21. Day drinking is ok if you have the day off

22. But maybe cut yourself off after 3 Hand Grenades

23. Pinch the tail & suck the head

24. Don't eat the dead ones

25. Shake out your shoes before you put them on

26. There is always a place to go dancing

27. Life is always worth celebrating

28. Always be open to new experiences

29. Not all transplants are bad

30. The lizards come out in the summertime

31. There is no better duo than a cafe au lait & a beignet

32. And the best coffee in the city is in a cemetery

33. Pools are better next to hot pink grass

34. And house music pairs perfectly with humidity

35. Tree roots > sidewalks

36. Don't ever order crawfish in the French Quarter

37 And no, you can't have crawfish in September

38. Your neighbors will always have your back

39. So watch out for theirs too

40. The world is a big, big place

41. And in relation, we're all really small

42. Just ask the Oak trees

43. Don't get your bike tires stuck in the streetcar tracks

44. You'll be scrubbing the Bourbon Street rubbel from your knees for two weeks afterwards

45. Brass music gets in your blood

46. And once you find a love for it, you'll never let it die

47. Culture is wealth

48. But pretension creates lack

49. Witches are real

50. So are absinthe fairies

51. You can det drunk off of a big, purple slushies by candelight in a 300 year old building

52. You can't beat 25 cent martinis at lunch time

53. People will find any excuse to drink during the day, dress up in costumes & have a good time

54. Like literally...any excuse...

55. Working service industry during Mardi Gras is the most rewarding, exhausting, infuriating & magical experience ever

56. But you best not be late for work

57. Even if you're on the wrong side of the parade

58. It's a whole different kind of morning when you're waking up at Snake 'n' Jakes

59. Bacchanal = for when you want to be trashed and classy

60. A visit to the Chime Tree can fix just about anything

61. Dancing is always allowed & always appropriate

62. Mondays are for red beans & rice

63. WHO DAT!

64. You can always move somewhere else, but your heart stays in New Orleans

65. If you're a misfit - you fit :-)

66. You're always someone's baby

67. The glory of drive through Daquiri shops

68. How to say no - and realize that you can't possibly make it to everything that' going on

69. Patience

70. How to play the "puddle or pothole?" game

71. Expect the unexpected

72. How to make a dazzling costume with two days notice

73. Also you'll need a seperate closet for all your costumes

74. It's a streetcar - not a trolley

75. Never touch the altars

76. It costs nothing to be kind

77. We're really here to take care of each other

78. You'll never be ready for MOM's Ball until you go

79. Hurricane parties are a thing

80. You will never, ever conquer the mosquitos. They were here first and they will be here long after you are gone.

81. Glitter gets in your blood

82. Mardi Gras is a month-long celebration

83. And Fat Tuesday is a daytime event

84. So don't get so drunk on Lundi Gras that you can't make it to the next morning's parade

85. It's completely normal to parade through the French Quarter in your underwear

86. Southern hospitality

87. There is no place with better food

88. How to take it easy and enjoy life

89. Run in a zig-zag form if being chased by an alligator.

90. What it actually means to bounce

91. How to throw beads from balconies

92. Look up or duck

93. What a shotgun house is

94. Go cups

95. Sometimes it's good to find a tiny baby in your mouth

96. It's all about context

97. Porch sitting is an underrated art

98. Your bike might get stolen & your car might get flooded

99. You might work terrible service jobs & sweat your soul out

100. But there's no other city like New Orleans

101. laissez les bon temps rouler