Love is . Part ||

Remember Who You Are.

"We build our own garden. We sow the seeds and nourish the leaves. Plant yourself within the soil, rooted in your authenticity. Shower yourself with praise, love and adoration. See your worth. Know your value. And know that any who try to take your voice are not doing it for your own good but for theirs. Never make it easy for them, rage against their tyranny. They fear us, you see. They fear the power of the feminine."

- An excerpt from the Girl God Anthology, Original Resistance: Reclaiming Lilith, Reclaiming Ourselves. C. Ara Campbell

The womb is the very first home we all have ever known. From the womb to the tomb. It’s been that way.

I used to find myself searching for home constantly. In different people , places and things. It’s as if I couldn’t find a sense of true peace and serenity anywhere or with anyone. That feeling of being totally grounded and in tune with where I am, who I’m with and even how I feel is often times non-existent. Being still freaks me out. Commitment frightens me. Intimacy makes me want to run and hide. Perhaps I’m fearful of my life passing me by if I give myself permission to be still. Do I steer clear from any form of commitment out of a preconceived notion that my freedom will be extracted from me or that I will eventually be abandoned? Where is the wound located in my body that deems me unworthy of passion and intimacy ? Self-reflection time.

It honestly has taken me 24 years to truly grasp and innerstand that my heart and my beautiful vessel/body is my home. Innerstanding this has allowed me to ease into my reality more while tapping into my own strength. Relying on myself for comfort, love and security while giving myself permission to allow others and the world itself to pour back into me. That’s peace.

Reclaim Your Power

THE MOTHER🥀

This Chapter of my life would be titled “Transitioning”

Being a wom(b)an is being authentically you. Embracing every part of yourself and taking back everything used against you to transform it into something beautiful. Loving others without loving yourself any less, and showing the gift and the power we hold as women. Being a great example of life itself. We create life in our womb and that alone is powerful.

I didn’t grow up with a consistent Mother figure but I’ve seen many different ways of parenting and Motherly figures. I feel like I had to fill that Mother role for myself, and since I missed out on having a mother in my life, all I think of is my future with children. Everything I’m doing and healing from now on is for them and myself. I think about it daily, and I’m very Motherly around all children. I just feel like I naturally know how to handle kids even though I don’t have any. Children seem to love me. I am a nurturer.

Womanhood has taught me many things. The biggest one is standing up for myself. I used to never really stand up for myself or stand my ground especially with men. Having boundaries, saying what I like and don’t like. I struggled with that forever. I learned the importance of protecting myself and how boundaries come with that . It’s okay to have boundaries and to get rid of people who don’t respect them.

The experiences in my life have shaped me into the woman I am today because of the hardships I’ve faced. I’ve had to care for myself all of my life, so any obstacle I’ve been put in, I had no choice but to make it out. I don’t really like “losing” or giving up and I feel that I’ve truly gained the power of resilience.

The trauma I’ve endured has affected the way I navigate through life now in many ways. It’s taught me a lot about others but most importantly it’s taught me a lot about myself. It wasn’t until I started doing shadow work that I really learned a lot about myself and how I allow a lot of that trauma get to me and define me. I now look at my trauma and give thanks because it has shaped me into who I am.

I’ve learned to heal myself through shadow work and also being close and in tune with my emotions. I know what to do when I listen to myself and pay attention to when my emotions arise and why/how they came about. I’ve learned to heal myself through creativity as well. I express myself the best through creativity; writing, drawing, singing, dancing, making jewelry, and being one with nature. I love admiring nature and being around trees. I definitely feel the safest around trees, water and solitude.

Some advice I’d give to the version of myself I just grew out of is that everything is working out in your favor, and everything is aligning perfectly for you. Trust the process and stop worrying. To not over work myself . It’s okay to rest and take a mental breather whenever I need it.

I absolutely adore and admire this version of myself. I didn’t get here over night and that’s what makes me love it even more. I’ve been persistent in uplifting myself and getting through shit . I’m happy to be here to continue bettering myself .

There is always going to be some healing and growing to do but I’m obsessed with myself and my growth. A true Bad Bitch not to be reckoned with.

Why does everyone get so pissy when a woman is unafraid of her sensuality? Unapologetically expressive in whatever way she feels pulled to. Why must we get chastised if we decide to wear revealing clothing or post some risqué images online when we feel a lil’ sexy? Why is it okay for men to ask for sex when they want it but when a woman with an equally charged libido comes out forthright asking for sex, she’s instantly viewed as an easy nympho with no home training. Surely a woman who stands in her sensual power and embraces her feminine essence in such a way should be burned at the stake right? Yeah, sure. It’s only right.

Also when did the fullness of our bodies become simplified to the mere enjoyment of men and the entertainment world? We’re looked at more as objects rather than human beings with actual heartbeats.

We then continue to travel our paths feeling guilty and shame for the creative and sensual force that resides within us waiting to be unleashed, expressed or explored. We suppress that force. We ignore that fire burning inside of us that wants to dance , make love , fuck, paint , scream , sing , fight and play. We neglect the parts of us that are so primal and natural.

Until we somehow lose sight and blurr the lines of what feels good . . . And what does not.

Re-acclimate Into Your Reality

THE OPENER 🌅

I’m in this phase of life I’d like to title “The Opening”

I've been comfortable and safe and have been in position to know I can do what I want and I have support. I appreciate parts of the world that are beautiful, easy going, pure , natural and phenomenal. Rather than being focused on my life direction, or ambitions and responsibilities. I release thinking that it's good or bad having a stable upbringing.

Sometimes I notice myself not behaving authentically. In the sense that my behaviors sometimes feel like they have an underlying anger or self-doubt/confusion/cloudiness at times instead of being as enthusiastic and charismatic as I usually feel.

I’ve gained self- knowledge through retro and introspection, acceptance and forgiveness of self/others, gratitude and amazement in even the smallest of things, trusting in and feeling safe within myself, and indulging in a stimulating and more in-depth sensuality rather than that shallow teenage shit.

I am here to remind you to never bow. Never swallow your sexuality, your expression or your passion. They try so hard to make women digestible, to make even our desires palatable for them. They try to twist our bodies for their pleasure. The time has come for women to reclaim their sacred garden, tangled with passions and dreams. It is ours to plant and cultivate as we see fit, and for none to strip from us.

-An excerpt from the Girl God Anthology, Original Resistance: Reclaiming Lilith, Reclaiming Ourselves. C. Ara Campbell

I stopped feeling guilty about circumstances that have passed. Being alone often was a huge plus. Talking to myself out loud, meditating, and being okay when things are tough. I practice treating it as an opportunity to get a clue of what's really wrong in certain areas of my life and make adjustments, rather than allowing myself to feel down and defeated. Crying (maybe being overly sensitive for once), or masturbating.

I discovered that the source I draw my feelings of being understood, loved, happy, valuable, motivated, and powerful is right within me.

As far as this new version of myself ... I am happy for her. At peace with going through the darkness and emerging into a new comfort and re-acclimation with and of self.

Re-invent Yourself

THE LEADER 🌻

Let’s label this Chapter of my life “Exclusivity”

I’m the Sun. Naturally . I feel like I have had to dim my radiance throughout life. Constantly feeling like I have to hide my spark just to appease the comfort zones of others. Suppressing all of my spazzaz out of fear that someone , some day , will put me in a box after compartmentalizing every aspect of my being.

Feels like everyone is always picking and pulling me apart. Piece by piece. Over and over again . During each phase of my existence I encounter a new version of wom(b)anhood and overall femininity. It’s such a ride . A total thrill . The ever changing and ever shifting ebb and flow of divinity floating through me. I find myself feeling so low sometimes and at war with myself . At war with my body and it’s curves and shapes. At war with my thoughts and the patterns and habits that take up space within my mental . At war with who I’ve been and what I’ve done. I attack myself as if the world doesn’t already shun me enough. Oh but darling, I am human . I was crafted to be tough .

I’ve learned many lessons. The greatest lesson has been to truly value myself. Appreciating my worth and accepting who I am in all of my fullness. All of my vibrancy . To rely on my own strength , while still moving through life with grace and an open heart. My tender heart. I utilize it to guide me.

Re-directing my energy and focus back to self is always the key. I had to spend time in complete and total solitude to really see myself. To understand who I am and begin a journey of accepting my entire being. I had to set boundaries. As a free spirit, I sometimes don't realize how open I allow myself to be with people. My sensitive nature would often be taken advantage of and I would find myself going in and out of depression and a deep desire to always be alone or simply keep my distance from others in order to protect my peace, my heart and sense of self.

I believe that everyone is special and valuable so there's potential for me to lack discernment when it comes to knowing who is worthy of energy exchange with me. I had to realize that in order for me to truly grow, I had to make myself exclusive . Not easily accessible. Honor myself. Honor my space, my gifts, talents, my time and my money. I had to learn how to determine who gets access to me and in what ways they have that access. For I am not a woman to be conquered or used . I am the sweetest joy. The most beautiful gift. I had to believe it first .

Overall , I’m accustomed to being judged for who I was , who I am , and who I am becoming. Most of my life I have always embodied the energy of the serpent. A portion of my purpose is to help people realize that the only thing consistent in life is change. I am a representation of transformation. Ever changing . Ever evolving . Forever ancient . I have faith in myself now after feeling like my self-worth depended on everything external to me for so long. Surrendering to myself has been the most liberating experience . I released the need to feel validated and loved by people who don't even have the courage or awareness to value and love themselves. I stopped internalizing my experiences with people because everyone is going through something . We are simply sharing ourselves with each other. So why are we taking everything so personally? This concept has allowed me to move forward more confidently as a woman knowing that I am not defined by what I've been through and what people think of me. To have mercy on others by not judging them for finally arriving at places I've already been and encountering parts of themselves I've already met and cultivated .

I am me .

There can never be a copy of this blueprint.

"I am housing both a joy that is inexplicable and a deep sadness that is so beautifully pure. The beauty and love in my life is grand. Spirit is here, moving in every moment. The motion of why things happen in the way that they do is astonishingly clear, and that provides a salve to the raw, not so rare sadness that often takes my breath away. Full of both deep belly laughs and a weeping where it feels as if my ribs have cracked open. Thriving and grieving.

It’s strange to feel both so full and void all at once. But then I examine this void closer, and realize it is not empty at all. But rather, richly illuminated in an enveloping light, that brings forth many exposed feelings, with their principal being of love. And it makes me wonder, is what I’m experiencing a true blessing that life brings? To experience such a wide spectrum of emotions that are rooted in the deepest of love? The pain I experience feels noble, almost gift-like. I am believing that pain is brought forth to us as a massive blessing. Acting as a spring board, a love creator, a garden grower, a gratitude inducer, a hug your loved ones a little tighter reminder, and overall a valid experience, to excel the spirit and to grow deeper in love. If we can find a way to be open through the shifts that life brings, we will find a way to dream, and then creation happens, and thus new life is brought forth, and that is how we heal. We are held, even when it feels like we are falling. It’s like those dreams where we are hurtling towards earth 100mph, we are terrified, but then we realize it is all ok, and we open our arms wide and realize that we are flying. Our falls are leading to our salvation”

𝘈 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘬𝘦𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘯 𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵.

-Jessica Joelle Silvers

Re-write The Narrative

THE LIGHT 🌟

This chapter of my life is called “Restoration”

I've learned that no matter what, we will always be misunderstood . It’ll always seem like we’re too much or too aggressive . . . but that’s okay .

It has been important to learn who I am and love that woman unconditionally flaws and all . It’s important to be gentle with myself first. To love myself so that I’m able to do so for others. We never stop learning or growing . No matter how many times we fall we can get back up.

The trauma I’ve endured has caused me to operate in different ways during different stages of my life . At one point it was consuming lots of drugs and alcohol or having sex to feel good.

At some point I was getting tired of feeling less and spent time alone . I spent days, even months, not talking to anyone. I eventually found peace in making music , modeling ,speaking about things I went through , videos , and reading more . I am now more cautious with where and who I give energy to. I know to accept people for who they are and who they show me instead of the potential I see in them . I accept reality for what it is .

I had to stop worrying about niggggas to live life and focus on me in every way shape and form . Fasting from social media , learning when to take time alone , working out , staying busy overall .

I love myself . I’m constantly evolving , finding peace 🥀

“There’s something so special about a woman who dominates in a man’s world. It takes a certain grace, strength, intelligence, fearlessness, and the nerve to never take no for an answer.” – Rihanna

Re-direct Your Focus

THE TEACHER 💙

I’d title this chapter of my life “Healing”

Womanhood has taught me a lot about self love, care & feminine energy.

Being a woman , to me , means being free and being loving . It means being strong no matter what trauma I encounter and it means never giving up on myself .

The trauma I have endured in life has had an affect on my relationships. It’s hard for me to trust because I’ve been let down so many times . It sometimes affects my ability to show emotion because being nonchalant will shield me from getting hurt . It has shaped me into the woman I am today because I am no longer afraid of hurt and pain . I know that it’s apart of life and it only makes me stronger.

I have learned to heal myself by finding my spiritual balance (meditation, reading).

It gets better . . . never give up . No matter how many people give up on you . . . it gets better.

I feel very proud of myself for how far I have grown and changes I have seen in myself . Eager to see what changes I will continue to see down the road . 💙

“I’m learning how to drown out the constant noise that is such an inseparable part of my life. I don’t have to prove anything to anyone. I only have to follow my heart and concentrate on what I want to say to the world. I run my world.” – Beyoncé

Re-align With The Truth

Infinite 🧿

“This chapter of my life is all about brushing off the bullshit”

My soul is restless.

I’m itching for something,constantly..

something I don’t even know what it is.

10 years ago I would of reached for a little orange bottle.

7 years ago I would of settled for beating someone up.

5 years ago I would of settled on their ego.

3 years ago I would of stolen that chapstick.

2 years ago I would of laid in bed for days.

1 year ago I would of screamed about it.

6 months ago I would of settled for some physical love in some unavailable places.

Unearthing the winding road of my broken heart. Shattered but not busted, like a crystal in the sun.

I am the breath stolen from your mouth when I enter the room.

I am the one who makes your soul trimble for a connection countless years of life cannot still explain.

I am the passion.

I am the light. ✨

P.s. Nothing and no one will break my faith in myself. No one can take my peace.

-Lacey Nicole Knight

My experiences have shaped me into the woman I am today because I have had to be all of the different women in me to make it to this version of myself. Each and every experience I have had in joy and in pain have all shaped and molded me. I am able to go more in depth with myself and others the more I experience life.

Through my own life, and the lives of the other women around me, I have lived many different lives. Being a woman has allowed me to feel on a deeper level and to really embrace my own feelings as well as being able to empathize with Mother Earth and my day to day world around me.

I have learned many ways to heal but by far the most through the water. Water has been healing me long before I even knew it to be so. Before it was healing me, it was creating me , and it is the place I feel most at home with myself and my soul. I like to dive to the bottom of a deep pool and just look up and see all of the glory of the sun and the water kind of mixing together. I love the water because she is strong and mighty. Can kill a man with less then 4 table spoons. She can end all life if vanished but also supportive and nurturing. Always taking care of us.

I like to go run and just lay or sit in the heaviest of summer and early autumn showers. The power of the drops on my skin is so cleansing and just fills something in me I can’t quite put into words. I bathe with sage filled salts and jungle scented candles that make me feel home in a past life I don’t fully see yet. I pull my crystals that I charged in the sun everyday and the moon at night. I bring my mojo bag and I pour in the lavender bubbles and just levitate. These are a few ways I like to use water to heal.

Womanhood has taught me true love beyond belief. The power and honor of creating life within me and bringing them to life. Womanhood has allowed me to not only grow my babies strong and healthy but also to nourish them with my own body years after they were born. I have learned what its like to have to trust when there was no trust left to be given and how to love even when I couldn’t love myself but most of all womanhood has given me my wonderful mind with locks and curves to match and I am proud to be a part of the tribe. I am learning to embrace the woman that I am and to love her for ever inch of who she is.

The traumas I have endured through my life have affected me deeply in a number of different ways. I have deeply rooted mother issues and a load of father issues I didn’t know existed. I have witnessed and endured things as a child that I wouldn’t dare wish on another. I have had to figure out how to be a parent and love my children while also still having functions of one. Because as a child I wasn’t properly taught how to express what I was feeling. I have had to lose people I loved deeply because I didn’t know how to control myself or the situations happening around me. I have lost opportunities and parts of myself along the way but all in all everything that I have endured has lead me to a road of healing and a life worth living everyday. I have learned to cope with my triggers and stay calm when I am afraid. I have learned to push forward and rise above lost hopes and dreams and to create even bigger ones. My hurts have led me to warm hearts and wholesome relationships that reflect my worth and a life that I very much enjoy. I truly feel I have found a way to find a calm in my storm and the storms that were never mine to endure in the first place. Life is good, trauma sucks but we rockin it baby!

Remind them of who YOU are.

THE EMPRESS 👑

I believe I embody the truest essence of femininity because I honor all that I am. I’ve discovered that there is no right or wrong way to be womanly. That existing is more than enough. My essence is the present to this world and I must carry myself as such.

Throughout countless heartbreak, numerous painful life experiences , and a series of unfortunate events I have come back to my own soul. Humbly. Back to the purity of who I am after dealing with a world that is constantly trying to tell me who to be, how to act , how to feel and how to heal. I dance when I am feeling emotions my words cannot express. I write and smoke weed for hours to distress. To get away from the world , to quietly enter my own. I over-eat when I’m sad. I pray . When I’m driving, when I’m studying , when I’m sleeping and when I’m weeping. I pray to purge whatever it is that I’m holding on to during whatever phase of my life to free myself. Womanhood has shown me how to surrender . To let allah lead the way. To let the divine take me on a ride as I explore these different versions of self. As I encounter all the parts of me that create this beautiful being I was born to be.

The truth is that my story is her story. I’ve learned that the best way to heal is to share what I’ve been through. To prepare a woman who is bound to enter an experience I’ve already went through or to bring clarity to a woman who has not yet fully healed from it. It’s equal give and take. The constant reciprocity of love and divine sisterhood .

We must first heal ourselves and our tribe before we can all rise as a collective . The shift is happening . The forgiveness is taking place. The truth seekers have awakened. We are no longer choosing to be silent . We are choosing to speak with purpose . We are no longer saying yes when we really mean no. Our choices are valid and we deserve respect. We will not tolerate or accept anything that is not beneficial to our highest selves or the greater good. We are no longer settling for mediocre sex. We are no longer letting our daddy issues become our relationship issues. We are no longer falling out of long term friendships. We fight for them when it’s worth it. We are no longer second guessing our intuition because our psychic powers are lit.

We will not be subjected to the rules and viewpoints of society. We choose freedom and adventure. We choose openness and lighthearted glee . We choose to not let our past dictate our future. We choose to let people be who they are without trying to change them because acceptance is key. We choose to embrace who we are , even when all odds are against us. We choose to fight for our souls because women are warriors too. Don’t you ever forget it.

We are the wild women. The ancient ones. The infinite ones. The chosen ones . The lovers and healers , mothers & titty milk dealers . We are reclaiming our power , our strength and our resilience . The world summoned us to cause a shift within the collective for the greater good of New Earth. The divine feminine has risen .

We aren’t going anywhere . . . Anytime soon. We’re apart of something way bigger.

Credits

Author : Trashae Bradley [Facebook: Trashae Bradley] [Instagram: theethereal_empress ]

Photographer : Micah Thompson

Makeup artists: Ashton Farris Mary Zemenye

Models:

Trashae Bradley

Laisia Rachelle

Dasaj Daniel

Karltonae Simpkins

Perrin Alyssa

Lacey Nicole Knight