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I'm Not the Pretty Girl

by Madison Rheam 5 years ago in body
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But I Am

Do you ever feel like you're not going to find your soulmate? I definitely know that feeling. I also know the feeling of thinking that you're not enough for someone. I know the feeling when your mom or dad says, "You would be one hell of a catch," but I know that I wouldn't be. I know the feeling of being crazy excited when you're finally talking to a hot guy and then you feel like you're worth something because someone like him wants you. I used to know these feelings. Not anymore.

I realized my worth. I know that I am always enough. I am always going to be enough. I am definitely not a size 00 or even a size 10, but I know that regardless of my weight or my shape, I can rock a crop top. If I want to wear a bikini, I can do it because I am a confident thick girl. You all should be too. Now I know a lot of people tend to focus on the thick girl being called fat. I don't like the word fat. I personally feel that it's degrading. Someone may be larger built for different reasons. I know me, personally, I'm fighting genetics and medication side effects. I work out six days a week and eat rather healthy and simply cannot lose weight. That's okay. On the other hand, if you're the skinny girl, there is no need for others to shame you for that either. Maybe you wish you could gain weight, but you simply cannot. That is okay. I will not shame any girl regarding their appearance. If you don't think you're beautiful the way you are and you think what I'm saying is complete nonsense, please don't stop reading. My goal of this article is to get girls to love the way they are. I know the everyday saying is, "love yourself before you expect others to love you." I used to hear this and just let it go over my head because I figured it was complete BS. It's not though.

You are all beautiful. From size 00-24 or higher, you are all beautiful. Some of you may have scars for different reasons. Do not be ashamed of your scars. Show them off to prove that you have overcome the stress of being human. If you have stretch marks, they aren't an embarrassment. They are your battle scars. They show every stressor in life that you have overcome. Never be ashamed of yourself. Everything that makes you different makes And who doesn't love that?

You do not need a guy to love you to make you feel good about yourself. Yeah I know that always makes you feel better, but that's because we're human and we all crave that feeling of love and acceptance. Basically all I'm saying is that you are lovable. Anyone WOULD be lucky to have you. You ARE a catch. If anyone tells you different, you don't need them in your life.

I know as some of you are reading this you're still thinking, What does this girl know? She probably doesn't even actually feel insecure about anything. Well you're definitely wrong. I've felt many, many insecurities throughout my life. I was always the one who looked different. I was always the fat friend. I was the one who in pictures of myself I tried to suck air through my lungs into my shoulders to make it seem as though I was five pounds lighter. I was the one who would never take a side view picture in fear that you'd be able to see my stomach shape all too well. I was the one who never got to buy those cute bralettes because they don't make cute bralettes for DD breasts. I was the one who was always in the double digits. I always wore a one piece swimsuit in hopes that you couldn't see my muffin top. I was the one who wore longer shorts in hopes that you couldn't see the many stretch marks on my thighs. I was the one who was insecure as I looked at myself in front of a mirror. I thought to myself that my breasts were too big, or they weren't perky enough. I thought to myself that no guy wants a heavier girl when they can get a skinny girl. I remember one time especially that I asked myself, "What do you think it'd be like to be the pretty girl with no worries?" I always thought that girls who were skinny had it all. That's not true, because everyone fights their own battles with their own insecurities.

Some people will always shame you, regardless of your appearance. Certain people would find something to complain about on a barbie. What matters most, though, is that you do not shame yourself. Never shame yourself because you are beautiful. You are beautiful. You are. And you. And you. And you.


About the author

Madison Rheam

HACC graduate with Associates Degree in Social Sciences, LGBTQ+, raging liberal, feminist.

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