Everything They Don’t Tell You About Abortion

I never thought I would be in that position. From the time I was 19, I was told I could not have a child and had a low likelihood of even getting pregnant. So I never thought much about it. My period was never really consistent so I also didn’t think about that when I “missed” my period. But then my boobs started to hurt and grow, my chest always hurt and I felt nauseous. I took a pregnancy test and I couldn’t breathe when it said “pregnant” (gotta love those digital tests). I was freaking out. I was newly employed, living on the road and not to mention, my body was already a wreck. I called my best friend and she calmed me down then I told my boyfriend. We discussed it but settled quickly on an abortion. My boyfriend had never considered abortion and was even heavily against it. But with my health issues and current problems, attempting to carry a child just wasn’t a good idea.

A few days after I found out, I got an appointment to confirm the pregnancy and talk about my options. The doctor was so rude, told me when I would have had the child, didn’t even do an ultrasound .. it was just not a great experience. So then I called a Planned Parenthood and made an appointment. It still had not set in. We ended up moving to another state and I was miserable. My body hurt, I was anxious and I just did not feel great at all. Nobody tells you how hard it is on you mentally and physically.

The day of the appointment came in and I was nervous but felt like this was the best choice for me/us. Because of COVID-19, my boyfriend couldn’t go in with me and that definitely made my anxiety rise. The appointment was a total of about 6 hours and afterwards, I really did appreciate how through they were. I first had an ultrasound and that was when it all really hit. I had asked not to see it but the confused look on the nurses face made me ask to see my ultrasound. The sac was empty. I had never seen anything like it.

Over the next few hours, I filled out paperwork, got my blood pressure and all that checked. I was a mess but it was nice being able to sit outside and wait with my boyfriend. He was the biggest support during this time. Then the time came for the surgery. I was not able to get the pill because they said it could have been very bad for me if I was bleeding too much from it. They gave me light sedation, which for me, knocked me out. The doctor came in and we chatted about dogs. I truly appreciate how wonderful all the staff was. Then the doctor explained to me that the empty sac emeant it wasn’t technically a pregnancy and very well could have killed me if I had waited. That really did make the guilt lessen. Afterwards, I did research on my own and found out that what I had was A blighted ovum. It is when an early embryo never develops r stops developing but the sac remains. So they still had to remove the space and they put and IUD in at the same time.

I was then walked to the “recovery” room, where they give you snacks and drinks and a heating pad. A nurse is also in there with you. I waited about 30 minutes then the nurse walked me out. We drove home and I was in quite a bit of pain. I was in pain for about a week, with cramps and just not feeling great. A heating pad, 800mg ibuprofen and lots of water and sleep is what helped me get through.

The guilt women are made to feel for making choices for OUR bodies is ridiculous, that’s why I wanted to share this story with you. Having an abortion actually “saved” my life in a way and it was the best choice for me at the time. Planned Parenthood made sure I knew all my options, I knew how the process worked and how it would affect me. The staff was amazing and I am glad I had that support and care for such a tricky time in my life.

I will always be pro-choice, it isn’t my place to tell you what to do with your body. And now I want to be the woman that can support any and all people in their life and choices. The mental turmoil is honestly the hardest part. Make sure you have some support in your life, follow the doctors directions and work on not being ashamed of your choice. We all have to make hard choices in our life. Just know that you are not alone and you never will be alone.

My goal now is to educate others on abortion, choice and women’s health. I talked with my boyfriend and helped him understand why I was doing this. But please remember that it is not your job to educate others on your choice. If you can, educate but if you can’t, just keep your head above water and focus on feeling okay with your decision. You will get through this.