“The feminine in women (and men alike) enjoys the flow of life and love, revels in the ability to enjoy beauty, nature, textures, colors, and experiences. Fullness is the feminine principle. If you have a feminine essence, you love the chaotic swirl of life, nature, bliss, color, texture, flavor, and communion. You love to relate, exchange, dance, celebrate, adorn and deepen into the fullness of existence.”
— Michaela Boehm (Tantra teacher)
Our world is one of dualities. It always has been. Black or white. Man or woman. Up or down. Good or evil. Light or dark. When speaking about the feminine divine, it's important that a man (also) carries aspect of this divinity. It's not so much as the woman, but it's a necessary principle for all creatures of compassion.
With that said, there is a duality about life whereas separation of each principle is the causality. As humans, we’re no different. A woman's dual nature, or twin nature, is incredibly powerful when she's balanced. But, as many people know (men too), let her nature go unchecked and one of the "twins" is bound to take control. It leaves them feeling all sorts of things. Among them is the overwhelming sense that she is completely lost.
For some people, this feeling of being “lost” hits when they’re quite young. It propels them on a journey (either spiritual, heroic, or both) in order to find that “missing” piece. For others, it takes much longer to be awakened to this emptiness. And, for some, they never realize it at all during this lifetime.
The twins being discussed can go by lots of different names, but one of the easiest ways to think about them is the masculine and the feminine. Depending on where you live, how you live, and your natural inclination, one of these twins tends to be more dominant. This means that, unless you are consciously working to achieve balance, you will naturally be guided off-kilter, erring more towards the masculine or feminine nature of your being. This goes for men and women. And while every human has both the masculine and the feminine, and both are equally important to our well-being, there is something magical about the feminine nature that is so often overlooked or neglected in most modern societies. Because of the “get-more-done” mindset (constantly on a mission to achieve more, do more, get more), the masculine energy is fed more than the feminine. This leaves many women feeling empty, depleted, unappreciated and exhausted.
Your Spiritual Journey Needs Divine Feminine Energy
The energy of the feminine embodies the nurturer, the healer, and the peacemaker. While the masculine energy is focused on doing, the feminine energy revels in being. This distinction is why it’s so important to leverage the power of the feminine while moving through your spiritual journey.
Far and wide schools focus on teaching you how to do, wiring us from the get-go to craft our lives around a career or professional journey, not a spiritual one. We’re given tools to help us do anything we want, except follow our spiritual journey. This is exactly why so many people, when they hit that moment in life where they feel lost and empty because of the misbalance between the twin energies, are left not knowing what to do next. They can create a resume, sure. But can they navigate the windy, mystical roads of spirituality and being?
Regardless of whether we are male or female, we all have a measure of the divine feminine and the divine masculine energy within us. And it is beneficial to draw on these energies within ourselves whenever they serve us. But it is time that those of us who who were born female, release our resistance to our own gender and begin to embrace and express our feminine essence. Women have been in resistance to the divine feminine within themselves for far too long just like human society has been in resistance to the divine feminine for far too long.
It's becoming understood that the dimension we are living in are dimensions designed for the purpose of expansion. In this dimension, expansion is the by-product of contrast. By contrast, we mean polar energies. This is a dimension of duality. And this is why as we digress away from the unity of source energy. We can see two polar energies arise. For centuries these polar energies have been referred to as yin and yang or the god and goddess. The goddess represents the divine feminine; the god represents the divine masculine. On a manifested level, this translates to a physical woman and a physical man.
Divine feminine energy (generally) represents the aspects within the universe such as: Restoration, life, renewal, creation, birth, healing, receptivity, openness, motherhood, nurturing, love, understanding, compassion, insight, intuition, wisdom, forgiveness, the moon, connection, harmony and sensuality. To allow the divine feminine within oneself to surface, women need to search for these aspects within themselves. You will find that you are more in touch with some aspects of your divine feminine nature and less in touch with others. For example, you may be fully in touch with your own sensuality, but not in touch with motherhood. If this is the case, expressing the divine feminine within you, means connecting with and expressing the latent motherhood within you; in your own unique way.
It is understandable how in today’s world, many women could be suppressing these energies in order to cope with modern day life. For example, it is difficult to allow the softness of receptive compassion into her life when she is expected to maintain a competitive career in the work place. But a woman's health depends on making the space in their lives to allow these inherent qualities to surface. Womanhood is uniquely divine. Every woman is a unique expression of the divine feminine. Coming into alignment with the divine feminine within them is not about conforming to an archetypal idea of what divine feminine is or isn’t. It's about releasing the things that disallow her own unique feminine essence from radiating through her. It is about re claiming who she really is.
Many women have built their lives and their image either in resistance to the traditional idea of what “female” should be, or in support of the traditional idea of what “female” should be. This is a problem because neither course of action represents their true selves. Neither allows women to be who they really are. Instead of being genuine to their true feelings (relative to their feminine identity), they spend their time either rebelling against expectations or embracing expectations that they don’t actually enjoy. They desperately want acceptance and approval. Women should ask themselves:
"Is there any part of the traditional female gender role that they actually enjoy?"
"Do I actually enjoy wearing high heels or makeup?"
"Am I using these things to highlight my femininity? Or do I do it because I feel we are not adequate without it, or must simply because I am female?"
"Do I enjoy the idea of a man being the 'provider' because it is fun to experience a person loving us enough to support my physical needs and wants? Or am I embracing the idea of a man as the provider because I do not feel capable of providing for myself?"
The answer will vary from woman to woman. I strongly suggest that women ask themselves these questions. Do your answers invoke a positive, emotional space or a negative emotional space?
"I was raised by a devout feminist. My mother was a by-product of the 60s. She was part of the woman’s rights movement and so my mother has been rejecting the traditional view of femininity for years. She dressed like a man. She burned her bras in public demonstrations. And so of course by virtue of her resistance, she managed to manifest a daughter who is all about lipstick, pushup bras and high heels. But what did this mean for me as a child? It meant that my mother went to great lengths to exclude anything pink from my wardrobe and toys. I got the message very young that pink was a color for girly girls and that girly girls were pathetic, powerless, weak, and to blame for the continual tyranny of men. Growing up, I was repulsed by pink because of that idea. I looked down on women who identified with pink as inferior. I saw them as a discredit to our gender. But when I was going through therapy some years ago, I was asked to visualize a color that felt safe to me and pink kept coming to mind. When I questioned my resistance to pink, I found my dislike of the color pink was not integral to who I was. I was rejecting the color pink because of what I was taught pink had to represent. When I was honest with myself, I found out that I absolutely love pink. It’s easily one of my favorite colors. And it does in fact make me feel safe."
— Natasha Belcher (R. L. Laster's Long-time friend and spiritual sister)
The thing about life (in general) is that if we are committed to living the kind of life that makes us happy. We need to commit to only keeping the beliefs and practices that add to our happiness. This means that many women will be embracing things that are traditionally seen as 'feminine'; while others will be discarding things that are traditionally seen as feminine. The goal (as far as embracing their own femininity goes) is taking the time as individuals (not as a female race) to decide what works for them— and what doesn’t. They do not have to (and should not) get rid of beliefs and practices that work for them (based on the fact that other people have decided it doesn’t work for them). They simply need to be very honest with themselves about what does and does not work for them.
Some suggestions, which will help you tap into your own divine feminine:
Allow yourself to create. Women are natural creators. This is part of why they can create life. When they're out of touch with divine feminine, most don't allow themselves to be creative. One of the best ways to awaken your creative energies is to dive into some kind of art. Any kind of art will benefit a woman if she's enjoys it. For anyone who is particularly blocked artistically, I suggest reading a book called the Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron. . . .You're welcome.
Collaborate and come together with other women. Come out of isolation. It is profoundly healing (if you’ve been in resistance to your own womanhood) to gather with other women— specifically to focus on healing yourself and each other relative to womanhood. Several cultures in our ancient world understood this. This is the thought process behind the red tent movement.
You can hold a women’s group that is centered on a feminine subject such as periods or motherhood and open up the floor for discussion. It is incredible the kind of healing that can occur when men are opening up about their own struggles and thoughts relative to manhood with each other. I assume the same can be said about women discussing womanhood. There’s no right or wrong way to do this and you can trust that when you gather together women in a room, the energy will always go in the direction of healing. It is important to note that the “no guys allowed” attitude that women hold towards these gatherings is not healthy in any way. This is because exclusion is the opposite of divine feminine energy. Separation of the sexes is part of what fuels the fire and misunderstanding between us. If men want to participate in these gatherings, consider yourself in good company. This means the men in your life are not threatened by the divine feminine and so it will just be that much easier for you to express your divine feminine essence around them. It may be difficult for some women to express their divine feminine nature with a man in the room. This is not natural. It is simply a byproduct of women being taught to suppress their femininity. It is a byproduct of embarrassment. But having an open minded, curious man present (or several present) for these gatherings, can actually help women to learn that they can unleash the divine feminine around men. Think of it as rehab! Besides, they're always complaining that men do not understand you, so help us out ladies! Open up to us and maybe we will understand you.
Explore your sensuality. The divine feminine is known as beauty incarnate. This means it is time to appreciate and celebrate beauty in your life. Does your life reflect sensual pleasure? If not, it is time to re-decorate. Surround yourself in aesthetically pleasing things. Allow yourself to enjoy sensual pleasures whether it is a warm bubble bath or fragrances you like. Surround yourself in color. And, it is time to begin exploring your own sexuality. Your bodies should not ever be off limits to yourself. Get to know yourself intimately. For anyone who would like help opening up to this side of your body and life, maybe “Getting Off” by Jayme Waxman can assist you. Please don't misunderstand my intentions here. I understand how this can be misinterpreted. As a part of my (ongoing) quest to understand the deepest NATURE of WOMEN, I've read many books like this. Getting Off is not all hanky-panky. I assure you, you'll love and appreciate Waxman's 'SENSE of SELF'.
Explore, question and heal your ideas and feelings towards motherhood and towards your own mother. It does not matter whether or not you actually want kids. Actually; most women harness unhealthy ideas and feelings about motherhood. Either they're in an unhealthy state of resistance about motherhood, or they feel that it is their only way to have significance and justify their existence. Neither of these ways of thinking makes women healthy as individuals or as mothers. Your first introduction to the divine feminine is none other than your mother. If you have resistance to your mother, you have resistance to the divine feminine within you. This means that one of the most important parts of the process of coming into your own feminine essence is to examine and heal the relationship between you and your mother. For some women, this is a tall order. This does not mean that they have to take action to re connect with their mothers. It does not mean you have to become best friends. Your mothers do not even have to be alive in order to heal your relationship with them. What women do need to do is separate themselves from their mother so they can shed off all the damaging ideas they might've passed on to you and set yourselves free from them. Women will find that once they distance themselves mentally and emotionally from them, they can learn to be themselves. Only then can you make peace with your mothers. Only then can a women truly embody the divine feminine within herself.
Examine the current perception of woman-hood in your family and in your culture. Examine what you learned while you were growing up in your family about what it meant to be female. Examine the traditional gender roles and associations with femininity on your culture. This will vary even from culture to culture in your own country. In America, the traditional role of being female (basically) entails: makeup, high-heels, birth control pills, concealing menstruation, dresses, wearing bras, shaved legs and armpits, becoming a wife, pregnancy, raising children, cooking, cleaning, kindness, caretaking, not expressing anger, allowing men to manage the household money, having hobbies (that don't empower the women), shopping, decorating the home, allowing the man do the heavy lifting (and manual labor jobs) and allowing men to open doors. Don't get me wrong. America is a large place, so this may not be typical in your city. Of course I'm being sarcastic. I'm a man and I think I've nailed it. Where was I? Oh! Examine what it means in your family and your culture to be feminine and decide which consensus you connect with. Which one do you enjoy? Which ones do you despise? Which ones (do you personally feel) reflect your divine feminine? And which ones (do you personally feel) suppress it?
If you grew up in a culture that identifies woman-hood as 'staying home to raise the children', it may be easy to feel inadequate as a woman. This is especially if you do not enjoy staying home to raise children. It may feel as if there's something wrong with you because you. You watch other women who love motherhood. You may feel obligated to believe their souls are flourishing as they consent to staying at home— raising children. Then you feel guilty about your feelings and try to force yourselves to try to enjoy child rearing in the same way that stay at home moms do it. This is the time to remind yourselves that divine feminine expresses itself in different ways. Just because you’re a different kind of mother, doesn’t mean you’re less of a mother for doing it your way. Don't try to conform to society’s idea of what motherhood should and shouldn’t look like. It could be that for you, staying home to raise a child (while your husband works) is not an expression of the divine feminine within you. For you, allowing yourself to have a career is allowing the divine feminine within yourself to express itself. Another woman might feel as if she is not valid without a career. She may try to force herself to enjoy a career in the same way other women do. This is also the time to remind herself that the divine feminine expresses itself in different ways. Just because she enjoys staying at home (raising the children rather than having a career outside the home) doesn’t mean she has sold herself short. She is no less successful and significant as a person. It could be that the divine feminine within her is screaming that its highest expression is to stay at home to raise children. For this woman, allowing herself to stay at home with the children, is allowing the divine feminine within her to express itself.
Get in touch with your intuition. Listen to your emotions. A woman who is run by logic is a woman that is profoundly out of touch with the divine feminine within her. Womanhood is a receptive state of being. Receptivity means taking down walls. Receptivity is a state of profound openness and part of what comes with that openness is receptivity to that which is beyond the physical dimension.
Cultivate openness, love, compassion and gentleness towards the world and towards yourself. I want to reiterate that this does not just apply to others. It also applies to yourself. In our modern society, women push themselves so hard every day. There seems to be no room for these qualities in their lives. But they're developing breast cancer because of it. Women are dying because of it. A woman's delicate biochemistry cannot keep up with what most are doing to it. It's time for a change. Choose three changes you can make in your day-to-day life that would allow these energies to come through. For example, you could commit to calling a friend one time a week just to practice listening to them with compassion and without judgment. Or you could commit to doing one loving thing for yourself each day, such as getting yourself a pedicure, letting yourself go to sleep instead of finish that project or buying that new outfit you can’t stop thinking about. Trust yourself to know what would benefit you the most.
Do meditations that are aimed specifically at connecting to the divine feminine. There is no right or wrong way to do this. You can invent your own if you like, but hundreds of these meditations can be found on line. Guided meditations are effective and a lot of people have great ideas about how to connect with your divine feminine essence. Try any of them that you feel compelled to try. The worst thing that could happen is you discover nothing. The best thing that can happen is finding one that really works.
Examine your resistance relative to being female on the spiritual, mental, physical and societal level. Resistance is a word I use to describe the energy behind negative emotion. Do you have resistance (therefore negative emotion) relative to to your periods? Do you have resistance relative to being a wife? Do you have resistance relative to your breasts? Do you have resistance to wearing or not wearing makeup? Do you have resistance towards being open with others? Do you have resistance to natural birth? If you feel resistance relative to any aspect of life that you identify as “female”, you have something in the way of the divine feminine within you. For example; let's say you feel that you need to wear dresses to embrace the divine feminine. OK, but now you're suppressing the divine feminine because you're associating dresses with being "female" and you continue to harbor resistance to dresses. Try to find your core beliefs relative to the resistance you feel. Once you've done that, release those core beliefs. Nothing facilitates the divine feminine to shine through better than releasing your resistance (relative to the things you associate with femininity).
Embrace your body. Many cultures are at war with the female body. As a result, women are at war with their bodies. Divine feminine expresses itself physically in unique ways. If you are resisting the parts of your body that make you female, you are resisting the divine feminine. There are many great books on the market that are aimed at helping women to embrace their bodies. Woman Code by Alisa Vitti is one of them. It's a 'how to' book, which empowers women to maintain health and vitality— as well as rebalancing their hormones and coming into alignment with what it means to be 'a woman'. It's suggestive, not FACTUAL. No forced beliefs.
Women need to be willing to heal their negative emotions (relative to anything they identify as female), to set the femininity within them free. Divine feminine does not need to be cultivated or created within a women. It is a women. It is the essence of your choice to come into this life as women. Much like a man choses to incarnate as a man, it is an ever-present energy that is always there. Ladies, your divine feminine is merely obscured by your thoughts and actions. If you begin to clear your minds (and lives) of the things that are obscuring that essence, it will immediately shine through on it’s own. It has to be exhausting— suppressing the essence of how anyone's divinity desires to express itself. It's time to quit suppressing it. It is time to embrace it and let it shine. By doing this, you offer yourself to yourself and if you desire companionship, you companion will have a better version of "YOU" to love, cherish and enjoy.
My name is R. L. Laster and I thank you for being exactly 'as you are'.
I've scripted a character-based novel series (for women) called INEFFABLE. It's a fabulous journey of magic, traveling, boy-toying and friendship that focuses on the feminine divine. I'll provide the link to book #1, chapter #1 below.
[At the time of this article submission, all chapters of INEFFABLE book #1 have not been uploaded (submitted) yet.]
If the first book of the series "MIRACULOUS EPOCH" peeks enough curiosity (here on VOCAL.MEDIA), I will begin publishing book #2 "MOMENTOUS ERA" chapter-by-chapter. And so-on for book #3 "MANDATED EON". You are going to love Michelle. I promise.