That's the way the ball bounces

When I was a kid growing up in Oakland, California, the hangout spot was down by Lake Merritt where Grand Avenue met Lakeshore, a place called “Kwikway, 19 cent Hamburger.” It was Kwikway because the service was fast. BAM! Done.

That gave me an insight into America, the first conspicuous clue about what really made America different. We Americans were an unimaginable collection of races, religions, cultures, influences, and persuasions, all sorts tumbled together.

Yep, E Pluribus Unum: one composed of many. That’s our motto, and it is a good one. When it comes to homogenization, this remarkable country takes the cake. And when you compare us to the levels of tribal warfare around the world among those trying to live peacefully and progressively together, we really are not doing too badly. We get along okey. But that isn’t what makes us different.

What separates us out was the incredible speed with which we get things done. BAM! Done!

Right from the beginning we led the world in accomplishing something or making who knows what, but whatever it was, it was going to happen in record time. BAM! Done again! That’s just how we solve problems.You can take that to the bank. We are good at making quick decisions, dealing with change. Sure, we are constantly bumping up against the origin of things being Chinese; people love trotting that one out: “The Chinese invented the pencil sharpener in BC 1263.” Whoop-t-do!

We hardly have any history. We aren’t talking about how long ago something occurred. We are talking how fast we can come up with a solution to a desperate problem right now.

That’s the American Way: our favorite word is instant; our favorite time is now. If it isn’t “let’s do it,” it’s “let’s get ‘er done.” But what if we cannot do it? What if something we desperately want cannot be had? To narrow it down a little: what if the corona virus interferes with basketball? Our beloved game of basketball.What if it stops basketball? Please… Nothing can stop basketball! Nor can anything stop the coronavirus. We have come to the most grievous impasse the world has ever known. Due to the basic nature of the the dread virus, professional sports, the lifeblood of American males, has virtually disappeared. You can’t get together in groups large or small. You cannot go to watch a game. Everybody should stay home. We all need to wash our hands more. It’s that cruelly simple. There will be no more huddling up, much less gathering in stadiums.

But worst of all, watching real sports on television is out. Professional sports has disappeared because of the corona virus. There are no current sports on television. And that is the most important part of the weekend for many American males. It’s the most important part of anything.Thanks to the pandemic sports has been ripped away from us.

Oh, you can watch Drazic vs. Sretenoic in the Eastern European Tennis Championships. But who really cares? You can watch a quiet, crowd-less completion of a golf tournament on a lazy Sunday afternoon. But the thrill of real sports is gone. No matter how you measure it, these weakly meekly golf, tennis, or snooker match-ups will never compare with the immeasurable joy of a last second basket in a Warrior’s game that brings every spectator and every television viewer to his feet.

So we brought our most brilliant minds together to solve the conundrum. In America the most brilliant minds are recognized as those who make the most money. That would be the basketball club owners and professional players. Happy coincidence!

So the brilliant owners of sports teams and television networks have come up with an idea. Professional basketball teams have been meeting to re-organized their thoughts and lives and save their livelihoods.This process is driven and confounded by several different factors.

Most important is money. Everybody has to make money. Prior to the arrival of the corona virus all of the teams, owners, and players made lots of money. Huge amounts. To do this they had to play more; so they had more and more play-offs in every sport. Now, suddenly, teams must play less. Where did the money go?

In basketball, people realized that no matter how few or how many games the teams played, some were not going to win a championship; when the corona virus decided to re-shape the schedule, weaker teams got cut out of playing. So now here’s the deal: the remaining teams all get to go to Disneyland (it’s only fitting) and play an abbreviated season in a CORVID 19 free space. Players with CORVID 19 have to stay home like all the rest of us. The theory is that at Disneyland players will get in shape, practice, and finish out the regular season, and some games will be televised. Then, after the play-offs two teams will compete for the championship. Once again, television will let us know who’s winning and then who is the champion. Yes! Basketball on television.

We go back to normal. Alas! We forgot something that refuses to be forgotten. Built into this appealing, wonderful, heartening plan (or illusion) is COVID 19’s disappearance. But we do not know that it will go away, or even take a time-out. The game is just getting started. If there is sports betting on this I am taking the corona virus.