When You Are Insecure About Your Religious and Political Beliefs

One common thing I notice in life is the correlation between people discussing politics and religion. There seem to be two types of people for each of those two topics. Ones who can discuss their beliefs with those who oppose them in a calm, rational way. Then there are people who are unable to discuss differences in political and religious ideologies without anger and raising their volume.

It’s ridiculous to not be able to discuss either of the two topics without letting anger and emotion dictate the circumstances of what should be a friendly, rational discussion or debate. Yet here were are in 2022, and few people seem to be able to discuss as well as LISTEN to an opposing view that differs from their own. Why is this?

Let’s talk about each of the two topics, separately. Though there are some common characteristics between politics and religion, they really are two separate things that should be discussed and handled differently. I’ll share a couple of things about each, I definitely have some experience dealing with the best and worst people when it comes to both topics.

Let’s chat about religion first. For starters, I was raised three times a week in church from birth until the age of 21. My father was the pastor for many of those years I attended church. I was raised in a very strict, rigid, somewhat hypocritical environment that was not at all accepting of other religions or lifestyles.

I could tell early on that the religion I was involved with and being taught had some contradictions. Quite a few, if I’m being honest. Yet we were taught not to question the Bible, God, or my father’s teachings.

I was a smart kid. I was given an IQ test in 3rd grade at the recommendation of my teacher and was found to have a 144 IQ. Supposedly, a 150 IQ score is considered genius level. Suffice it to say that the things I was hearing in church that my own father was preaching seemed to contradict many things in the actual Bible. This was confusing.

As I aged, I realized that the Bible was not something that most Christians followed to the letter. The ones that quoted it often seemed to pick and choose the parts that suited their own personal and political agenda the best. I cannot tell you the number of times I heard people that were supposed to be God-fearing, Bible-believing Christians use racist, bigoted, sexist, or homophobic language. My own father included.

This was disgusting to me and contributed to my exit from organized religion. I’ve had a number of run-ins over the years with people who were not too accepting of my own or my Bride’s ideas about religion. A couple of situations stand out when I think of such things.

Both involve my father. This is a person who thinks he knows everything there is to know about Christianity and religion in general. This is due to the fact that he attended a Bible college, and was a preacher for about 20 years, off and on.

Plus he holds a mail-order correspondence course doctorate in theology. So evidently, these facts justify in his mind that his ONE religion is the only true one around, even though many many others predate his preferred one. Imagine being that confident/cocky that out of thousands of religions, yours is the only possible one that is right. Everyone else on the planet is doomed to burn in hell.

The first story, I won’t go into a ton of detail about. Let’s just say that he used a bigoted slur that is unkind about gay people. I called him out about it in front of company in his own home. You can read the details about it in my blog, “Why I Told My Dad To Go Fuck Himself During Sunday Dinner”. That will save me the time of explaining it in detail once again. It wasn’t the feel-good story of the year, but it is something I’m still quite proud of after all these years.

The 2nd instance of intolerant, ignorant behavior on his part was the Christmas of 2012. My Buddhist Bride was sweet and kind enough to have a Christmas card made up for friends and family. One side had a kind, traditional Christian greeting. The back side had some sort of Buddhist holiday greeting on it, to reflect her own Buddhist-themed well-wishes to everyone she sent one to.

Well, my dad threw a fit like an insecure, spoiled dick. I got some nasty email or text from him that basically said something to the effect of “How dare your wife send me a Christmas card with a Buddhist quote on it.” Yeah. I saw red.

Never mind that the front half had a Christmas message. Never mind the fact that she cared enough to send him and my mother a Christmas greeting in general. Just some toddleresque fit he felt the need to throw about someone caring enough to send him a greeting card and take the time to think of him during the holidays.

WHO DOES THAT? I’ll tell you who. Someone who is VERY insecure about their beliefs. And that brings me to my point about religion and the people who freak out about people having differing beliefs than their own.

A normal, well-adjusted person would actually listen if someone else practiced a different religion than themselves. They wouldn’t feel the need to throw a giant fit upon hearing a relative, friend, co-worker, or any other human being in their orbit worshipped differently than they do. Or choose not to worship at all.

What do I care what your religious differences are from my own? As long as they make you a better and not worse human being, you do you. I cannot believe how many judgmental, angry, bitter people use religious differences to justify not loving and accepting another human being. This is very much against what the Bible and Jesus actually taught.

A loving, intelligent, secure person would welcome hearing about another point of view. They’d listen with the same respect that they would want someone of a differing faith to give them when they told them about their god, their beliefs, and their holy book. It cannot just be one-sided, prideful, and stubborn when dealing with people of differing faiths. That is completely ignorant, prideful, and wrong.

Politics is the other completely polarizing topic that ruins so many people’s relationships. When family, friends, co-workers, or acquaintances get bent out of shape about someone else’s political views, it’s a recipe for anger, fighting, and cutting each other out of one another’s lives. And it’s ridiculous.

With the rise of Donald Trump during his campaign and presidency, people lost their fucking minds over politics. I’ve seen a lot in my 47 years on this planet. However, I never had seen so many people get so angry and fired up about politics.

I don’t recall any family members calling each other ignorant names, or getting into such heating arguments as I did during the Trump years. I also had never observed my own extended family and friends being so ugly toward each other as much as I did during the past 7–8 years.

And for what? Donald Trump is an ignorant, racist, bigoted, homophobic piece of shit. It’s not like family members were debating between a wonderful leader like Roosevelt or Kennedy and someone else. This was a CREEP. A sexual predator. A scum bag, draft dodging, grab them by the pussy, creepy fuck. He did nothing for our country other than embarrass our nation almost daily in front of the world. He set us back decades on policy and stacked the Supreme Court with the very worst people.

You can read more about what this garbage human did to our country in my blog, “Donald Trump Is a Piece of Shit, and So Are You For Supporting Him”. All of the racist, bigoted, homophobic pieces of filth in my home state should take notice and read up. Perhaps it’s not too late to learn something about what actual, experienced leadership is truly like, as it relates to politics.

And it’s not like the left is perfect. Far from it. Politicians across the board are corrupt and so out of touch with reality and the average citizen in the United States. That’s why it’s so ignorant to treat each other so badly. So many of us are automatically horrible toward our brothers and sisters in society. It shouldn’t be this way.

When you worship politicians and hold them to some god-like standard as you would a celebrity or a rock star, you are excusing them from properly doing the job they’ve been elected to do. You defend them when they break laws and do wrong. You automatically make an enemy of anyone who isn’t a fan of theirs or speaks badly of them, often justifiably so.

Our country was built on the mantra of “United we stand, divided we fall”. I’ve never been more worried about a civil war than I have been these past couple of years. The insurrection on January 6th, 2021 showed how close we came to mass violence against normal everyday US citizens. And why? Simply because we have two very different sets of political beliefs and ideologies.

One side is all about freedoms and protection for ALL citizens. Sensible gun laws to protect our children. Welcoming immigrants, as we’ve always done in our country. The separation of church from state, and trusting women to do what’s right for themselves, and their bodies. The other is bent on controlling women, pushing religious agendas, holding back marginalized groups, and keeping white old men in power.

It’s disgusting that both sides can’t work together to find some sort of middle ground. We’re too busy fighting online, calling each other names, and being insecure about our own beliefs to the point of hating other US citizens. In some cases, wishing physical injury or death to someone whose political views differ from our own.

I’ve had numerous political debates online and even in person with all sorts of different people. I’ve never raised my voice in anger. I’ve never called someone else a motherfucker for believing what I deem to be complete nonsense, or racist, bigoted, sexist, homophobic drivel. Have I debated them in a respectful, friendly way? You bet.

The reason I don’t lower myself to so many’s angry, chest-thumping, “Fuck Joe Biden” flag-flying ways? Because I’m secure in my beliefs. I know what I’m all about and why those accepting beliefs are a good thing. I don’t need to lower myself to the level of the willfully ignorant to get my point across.

I’ve raised solid citizens in this household. My children know what’s right and wrong in America in 2022. They know how to politely and intelligently debate about the real issues we face without having to scream, yell, curse, or inflict violence toward anyone else. And I’m proud of them for that.

We do not need to lower ourselves to a rude, aggressive, ignorant way of dealing with each other when it comes to religion and politics. It’s far better to discuss, listen, and debate in a friendly, kind-hearted manner than to lose our shit over two topics that in the grand scheme of things, aren’t worth losing friends and family over.

The next time you find yourself in a discussion about religion or politics, do better than you might usually do. LISTEN. Give your reasoning for the things you believe or don’t believe. But make it a priority to listen more than speak.

See what the person you are debating with actually believes. Your approach is so important when it comes to friendly debate and the actual desire to learn something different than just what you already know. When you are able to talk to someone else with opposing views about religion and politics in a calm, kind, rational manner, your audience is far more likely to listen and give you that same respect back.