Bad Day? Blame Trump!

If this article is not read, I believe I have the perfect reason. Is it a lack of readers? No. More rather, it is because of our current sitting president, Donald Trump! After all, Trump is to blame for everything regarding the Coronavirus. Despite the fact that China is the real culprit behind the virus, let us instead blame Trump because...why not?

Let's face it. Donald Trump is seen in the mainstream media as an evil man. He is said to be far worse than the likes of Hitler, Stalin, Mussolini, Tojo, Pol Pot, Mao, Saddam, Darth Vader, Khal Drogo, Lex Luthor, your boss at work, the school yard bully, a nagging spouse, someone's invasive mother-in-law, the splinter caught in your finger, and the backache you developed from lifting that massive fifty pound box of boiled peanuts! In other words, Donald Trump is deranged, even Satan is afraid of him! Yes, you read that right! Not even the Prince of Darkness wants anything to do with President Donald Trump.

Yet, what could be so wrong about Donald Trump that he would be seen as being this evil? It simply has to do with the fact Trump won the presidency of the United States fairly elected by the people. However for some reason the Leftists refuse to admit their defeat. Instead, Democrats choose to blame the Russians for alleged interference with our elections! Ironically, after time and again failing to convict Trump on anything, the Democrats continue to believe this disproven myth.

Now, the media has taken it one step further in blaming Donald Trump on the Coronavirus! No, it wasn't China's fault, it was Trump's fault! You see, Donald Trump has conducted some magic that caused the Coronavirus to appear out of thin air because Trump is saturated with evil powers and thoughts. But let us all ignore the fact Trump did nothing to cause it. Regardless, lets blame him anyway!

The thing is, why stop at blaming Trump for the Coronavirus? There are plenty of things where Trump is at fault! For example, are you having a bad day? It's Donald Trump's fault! Were you late to work because of bad traffic? It must have been Donald Trump holding up traffic with his New York City demeanor! In the event you missed the school bus and had a crummy day at school in the way of a bad grade, be sure to tell your teachers its because of Donald Trump! Was your Little League game rained out? Trump sweated! The toilet stopped up? You better believe Trump was the one who left those giant logs in the bowl! Received a spoiler from your favorite television show? Oh yes, it was Trump who leaked that information! Are you facing a divorce? You better know that Trump had an affair with your spouse!

Oh, lets keep going!

I am willing to believe that people blame Trump from anything and everything. Why stop at a bad day or something broken when we could blame everything bad in History on Donald Trump! Here are a few examples!

The Extinction of the Dinosaurs

A major reason why these terrible lizards are gone is that Donald Trump hunted them into extinction! Trump wanted to have a giant T-Rex mounted on his wall, but ended up committing overkill! This was because Donald Trump used a meteor because as he put it, "It was a big meteor. A good meteor. No finer meteor."

The Fall of Rome

Trump was responsible for the Fall of Rome! As Rome was sacked by barbarians, Trump continued talking about making Rome great again! How would he do this? Trump proposed building a giant Trump Colosseum! The funding and supplies would have been provided by the barbarians themselves!

The Black Plague

The Black Plague was actually caused when Trump sneezed! He reeled back and let loose some major mucus! As a result, the people began to hack and cough and die! Thus, the Black Plague came about!

The American Revolution

Trump promised to make the Colonies Great Again. Yet, as luck would have it, a tea party took place in Boston!

The Civil War

Trump was a plantation owner who lived in New York City while trying to purchase land on the moon!

The sinking of the Titanic

Whatever you do, do NOT let Trump pilot your boat! Lest you crash into icebergs and sink on your maiden voyage! Trump was given the wheel of the Titanic and wanting to prove it was a good ship, Trump crashed into the iceberg! As a result of Trump's meddling, the Titanic is now underwater and has become the setting of a Leonardo DiCaprio film!

Both World Wars I and II

Trump was in Europe when both wars erupted! First go around, Trump was in Sarajevo partying with Archduke Franz Ferdinand. When Europe was at war again, Trump was making business deals with Churchill, Hitler, Mussolini, and Stalin...but they all fell through!

The Challenger Disaster

In his bid to create a better space shuttle, Trump contributed parts to NASA to be used on the Challenger Space Shuttle. Yet, Trump decided to cut corners for that one. As a result, we lost a shuttle.

Chernobyl Incident

As it was with the Challenger disaster, Trump also contributed to Chernobyl by trying to build Trump Chernobyl. The power course would have been Reactor #4 and considering the energy needed to light up Trump Chernobyl, it would seem that Pripyat would fall to Trump's desires for more power!

No matter how one looks at it, Trump is the fault of EVERYTHING!! No matter how evil and how bad and how deranged, the media should just hold Trump accountable for all the evils in this world. From starving children in third world countries to environmental disasters to the readers of this article losing the lottery, Trump is behind it all!