Don't Wish Me a Happy Memorial Day

Every year around the last monday of May, the same thing happens. I get grumpy and crotchety and I want to fight everyone and everything. Maybe it’s just because the Navy gave me anger issues with its stupid laws or incompetent officers, or maybe it’s a bigger issue and an issue that there’s really no help for: The car dealerships and every company with an advertisement standing upon the graves of my brothers and making the day of memorial about them and their greed. This article is one of my many attempts to shine a light on this holiday and force people to remember just why it exists.

Corporate America has done everything it can to erase any meaning from any sacred day or day of remembrance. They take a day and pump it full of frivolous bullshit to make a buck and take clear advantage of the country’s population.

I take severe issue with the fact that they do this because I see my brothers in my dreams and they visit me sometimes in the wee hours of the morning just before I open my eyes. I’ve heard many other veterans talk about this, such as the comedian Patrick Loller. I’ve actually snapped at someone for telling me to “have a good Memorial Day”. For many and myself, this is not a day of celebration, but a day of somber memory.

I served in the Submarine Force for eight years and during that time fifteen of my friends have committed suicide, all fifteen of them were sailors or veterans. Of note, twenty-two veterans commit suicide every day and have for as long as I can remember. For many veterans, this is what we refer to when we say we’ve lost friends to the Service. For many others, they watched or held their brothers while they breathed their last over in Iraq, Afghanistan, or Vietnam.

We understand that you don’t know why we’re so upset or angry, and you’ll probably never know, so please understand that we are upset and angry. We would love to celebrate with you and love life, but it’s difficult when the people we want to celebrate and have a drink with are no longer here with us and never will be again. We are bitter because our friends that we consider closer than family died in something that was likely due to the greed of American politicians or something equally pointless.

I’ve been told I’m sick in the head for trying to explain to someone as to why I don’t like Memorial Day or the Capitalistic joke it’s become because they said, and I quote, “If you don’t love this holiday you ain’t American!” Honestly I think anyone who would say that about a holiday that for the remembrance of the dead is the one that’s sick in the head. But what do I know, I’m just a salty old bastard.

It’s sad that this country seems to have forgotten what this holiday is for and what it’s about. Instead of remembrance, it’s cookouts and people getting taken advantage of by salesmen. Instead of honor and dignity, it’s half off during happy hour and people taking a giant steaming shit on the day that many veterans hold extremely sacred.

It’s disgusting and despicable that we go over and sacrifice everything up to and including our own lives to have this happen and if I had to guess, I’d say the treatment of this holiday in particular is one of the driving causes for veteran suicide and depression. So, please, don’t wish me a happy Memorial Day. I only ask that you remember the fallen, do not disrespect them, and leave me alone.

If you are a veteran and are in crisis, have thoughts of harming yourself, or want to kill yourself, the veteran crisis line number is 1-800-273-8255. 22 until none.