Sweet Freedom

1975 was the year I turned 15, and this song was the one that really brought it home to me--some people made difficult choices. Choices that meant conformity, not happiness. Choices that meant hiding under a bushel instead of letting their true light shine.

Imagine marrying someone simply because it was "expected", because it would make you "respectable". Up until this point, my understanding of marrying for respectability was limited to the saloon girls in the westerns my parents loved to watch. (Okay, I loved to watch them, too.)

You almost had your hooks in me , didn't you dear?

You nearly had me roped and tied

Altar bound, hypnotized,

Sweet freedom whispered in my ear:

You're a butterfly

And butterflies are free to fly

Fly away

High away

Bye bye

My favorite lines in the song:

It's four o'clock in the morning

Damn it

Listen to me good

I'm sleeping with myself tonight

Saved in time

Thank God my music is still alive! --Elton John

***

Also 1975, and this crazy movie came out--The Rocky Horror Picture Show. I may finally get to see this live this summer--the local theater just had auditions. I confess, I really, really wanted to do it--but that ship has sailed. No one wants to see 60 plus me running around in her underwear!

No Pride playlist should omit the fabulous Tim Curry as that Sweet Transvestite from Transexual Transylvania. That would be a travesty.

I see you shiver with antici-.....

-Pation

***

Are you perhaps getting the idea that 1975 was the year of my sexual awakening? Maybe it was. It was certainly a hot summer. But I was terrified of doing anything besides thinking about doing something.

I spent most of my time with a group of male friends--I was the drummer in a rock band and the only female. For them, it started as more of a gimmick--no one else had a girl drummer. But I fooled them--I was good.

The lead guitar player was my boyfriend. Maybe. Probably. To this day, I still don't know--the dynamics were that goofed up. He was immature and a bit of a dick. He didn't have a clue what he wanted, except super stardom. Could a star have a girlfriend? Wouldn't that mess with the fans who wanted to throw themselves at him?

(No, I didn't marry him. But I haven't ever stopped loving him. See? Weird dynamics.)

This video, released much later than 1975, pretty much sums up the band tooling around on Main Street on hot summer nights. Really, we probably looked more like Wayne and Garth in Wayne's World, headbanging and all.

"I think the whole group is gay," Tom remarked.

"Why not? I'd be gay, too, if I was getting that famous." (Gay meant happy to me--I was a naive kid. And my mother said the proper word for it was homosexual, so....)

Ramon sighed. "We have to teach you everything," he complained.

They didn't teach me much that was of any use to me in later life, I'll tell you that. But none of us cared who the guys in Queen loved--they were fantastic, and we all knew it.

"Why do they call themselves gay," I asked, "when no one wants to let them just be happy?"

That was a good question in 1975. It's 2021--I still wonder about it. I believe it was hope: Hope that they could be nothing more or less than just happy.

***

Which brings me to this song, and the ongoing quest for the freedom to be...

Instead, it was always pressure, and more pressure. David Bowie could certainly pen an anthem:

Turned away from it all like a blind man

Sat on a fence, but it don't work

The fabulous Freddy Mercury belts it out--

This is our last dance

This is ourselves

Under pressure

The pressure was real. So was the pure joy, and that was what I looked for.

***

For me, this song was all the joy--pure fun!

It's true, I didn't get it--I told you I was a naive teen. I didn't think about the lyrics; I just wanted to dance to music I wasn't busy playing myself. (Which was garage band rock-n-roll, by the way. We didn't play pop or disco; we were COOL.)

YMCA--it's a classic anthem, it's got a great beat, it is more fun to dance to than the stupid "Chicken Song" played at every wedding reception I attended from 1970 onto infinity, and it deserves Pride on Place on my list.

It's fun to stay at the YMCA

Young man, are you listening to me?

I said, young man, what do you want to be?

I said, young man, you can make real your dreams

But you got to know this one thing

***

This year, June is significant in that the first cases of what came to be known as AIDS were reported 50 years ago. Those 1981 cases were a shock, especially since no one had a clue what to do.

Negative conotations abounded, but that wasn't going to help anyone. What was needed was something positive that would raise awareness--and money--and stop the spread of homophobia based on ignorance and lies.

Naturally, the entertainment industry responded, and Live Aid was born. Who could ever forget David Bowie and Mick Jagger dancing and singing this upbeat song?

It doesn't matter what you wear

Just as long as you are there

It's an invitation across the nation

A chance for folks to meet

Whenever I see people marching in Pride parades, this is the song that comes to mind. No matter the adversity, the hope and joy of dancing together in the streets of the city is the real feeling fueling Pride.

***

But for poignant longing for love and acceptance, none could express it better than Queen.

Each morning I get up I die a little

Can barely stand on my feet

(Take a look at yourself)

Take a look in the mirror and cry (and cry)

Lord, what you're doing to me (yeah yeah)

I have spent all my years in believing you

But I just can't get no relief, Lord

I got no feel, I got no rhythm

I just keep losing my beat (you just keep on losing and losing)

I'm alright, I'm alright (he's alright he's alright)

I ain't gonna face no defeat (yeah yeah)

I just gotta get out of this prison cell

Someday I'm gonna be free, Lord

Freedom. Freedom to be who and what we are. Freedom to live and love as we were born to do. Freedom to be accepted and wanted and loved. It's what every human wants and needs to thrive in this world.

Love is Love is Love.

Can anybody find me somebody to love?

***

More Queen--but how could I possibly resist? It's all great music. And it feels like the best way to end this playlist.

I want to break free from your lies

You're so self satisfied I don't need you

BE FREE!

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