Spread THESE Words: “Children’s Genital Fetishists”

First off, if you leave trans kids alone, and stop trying to take away puberty blockers — that solves your misogynistic issues with “fairness” on girls sports teams.

But they don’t give a rats ass about women’s sports, and if you recently jumped on their bandwagon because of Lia Thomas’s historic win, neither do you. Maybe read this.

“I’m not being transphobic, but…” reads almost exactly like, “I’m not being racist, but…”

BUT you ARE Blanche. You are! (Google it)

There are stunted cis white men who sit in “conservative” (when was the last time they conserved anything but human decency?) “think” tanks and come up with the next way to get y’all to hate someone else. CRT is a particularly brilliant target because it doesn’t even happen in K-12, (or K-16, for the matter) but many now think it might. “Something has to be done!” Nope. Still nope.

I wonder why some of y’all elect folks into government who despise government and do their jobs (ha!) by majoring in minutia that screws with the people you also don’t care for.

If I’m hiring a house painter, I’m prolly not gonna go with the dude who TELLS ME he plans to burn my house down because he hates to paint. Maybe it’s just me.

There were no common words nor was there any space for me to express my authenticity growing up. Male puberty was forced on me against my will. I knew it didn’t make any sense for little girl me to suddenly have to attempt big “man” me, yet I got zero say in the matter. I have spent an entire lifetime making the best of what was, for me, a bad situation.

I must confess, I’m tired of accommodating all of you, when all accommodating Me requires is that you mind your own goddamned business. Simple, but you’d think I was asking for the fucking moon, hand delivered. I’m not.

From where I sit, religionists and republicans are the actual perverts. Their obsession with other people’s private parts is disturbing. They spend an inordinate amount of time fascinated by other people’s bits. And their latest fetish really is a bridge too far — republican politicians are all over the news talking about little kids private parts! It’s shocking to me, truly — and I’m not easily shocked.

I plan to call it what it IS, “Children’s Genital Fetishism.”

They really should seek help. We usually lock people up who spend so much time thinking sexually about small children. It’s not polite in our society, remember? It’s SICK.

If this bullshit all seems perfectly reasonable to you in 2022, I think you should talk to Jesus more. Or Stop that already and use the sense god allegedly gave you.

Here’s a parental Pro tip for y’all: You cannot, and should not “protect” your child from everything you don’t care to accept or understand.

Children are naturally curious, and remarkably understanding. Shucks, if you don’t keep pointing out everyone they’re supposed to hate along with you, they actually get along quite well with diversity. It is, dare I say, healthy.

I suppose it is your right to cling to ignorance as you see fit, but doing it on behalf of everyone else’s children isn’t your job.

Eventually, if your pal Putin doesn’t annihilate us all, your children will need to navigate this world. This changing world. If you refuse to acknowledge the sanctity of ALL human life, your kid is going to be woefully behind the curve. Like you. Is that really what you want for them? You hate being called transphobic, homophobic, racists! You’ll do anything BUT stop being those things. You triple down, actually.

But here’s the thing to ponder; I grew up in a world where there were far more of you. Your child is going to grow up in a world where there are plenty more of me, and folks who support people like Me will outnumber them.

My LGBTQ+ family has grown so very weary of y’all. Their beauty, and their power, and their authenticity, is reaching back to envelop even oldheads like me who tried so hard to conform. And that’s the thing with the truth -it always outs. Siding with truth, with reality, is aligning with the arc of history. Remember where that bends, dear MLK scholar?

I’ve been questioning myself, my experiences, all my premises, since I was old enough to recognize my own thoughts. I am constantly challenging my own assertions. I want to speak with clarity and conviction, but never at the expense of accuracy, if I can help it. My mind still does this incessantly. Like, all the time. I have to assume that’s just not a thing that happens for religionists or republicans.

There are glimmers of hope. A handful of state republicans are seeing that they have no place standing between parents of trans kids and their children. Exactly.

You don’t ever need to fully understand my situation. I (kinda) need you to accept that I know my own mind better than you know my mind. I understand what it is to be me better than you understand being me. And keep it pushin’.

If you are inclined to suggest I am mentally ill because I am trans, I can only direct you to all the major psychological associations in this country who will tell you otherwise. If you still care to flex, the problem is yours, friend, not mine. I don’t blame you for your obsession, of course. I am fabulous.

Trans folk of a certain age, especially those who transition later in life, know some shit. We have examined this life closer than you’d ever consider doing, because we have had to. Something about us just didn’t jibe with the rest of y’all, and once we know it, or finally accept it, all that can fall into place, does. If we had found peace by looking literally everywhere else, don’t you think we’d have stopped looking? I could shorten that question to, “Don’t you think?”

I have reached a stage in life where, if you are gonna glance over into my yard, you just might see a big broad in a turban and caftan who didn’t feel like shaving this morning, watering the flowers. And I will say, “Good Morning.” I’m not staying indoors behind the drawn shades on a sunny day, and my presentation has absolutely nothing to do with you. You might wanna note it maybe takes a bit of courage to be me, or not. You might want to avert your eyes altogether. I’m good either way.

I’ve spent my entire life dealing with bullies. Truth be told I even married one once, love her as I did. My mother was a bully who hated other bullies. Her eldest daughter has a similar inclination. My brother was an bully. I used to be so frightened by all of them. Petrified. Stopped in my tracks. Diminished. I never want to be one of them, though I often fear I have. In my quest for clarity I’m afraid etiquette sometimes takes a backseat. In a separate car.

As I was writing this I saw the news that Madeleine Albright died at 84. I only glanced at the comments section, and as usual, I am sorry I did. “Granny?” Really? Ageism is as ugly as every other ism. I’d never suggest we not vigorously challenge ideas, behaviors and consequences. But dismissing folks because of age (in either direction, actually) isn’t a good look. And, she never murdered anyone. Stay out the comments section. I’m sorry every time I don’t follow my own advice.

There’s a difference between civility and collusion. I’m all about respectful discourse. It’s been lacking in this great country of ours, and ugly is still ugly. But that doesn’t mean we stand idly by while folks dress up discrimination, bigotry and fetishes as “protecting children.” We can still “Shame the devil” even if it means that right now we are the ones who have to have these repeated disgusting interrogations they’d never subject themselves to. And our alleged allies should really think about whether fence-sitting is their best move against this evil nonsense. Neutrality isn’t an option when there is an obvious right and wrong. Peeking into kids underpants, metaphorically or otherwise, we’ve all agreed is wrong, right?

And all is not lost in comedy. All bets are still off when dealing with the KKK or avowed Nazis. Call them Granny all you want.

Despite all my best efforts, I raised two cishet children. I know. It’s almost exactly like they tell us who they are, not the other way around. But by creating an expansive environment where they could have come out as literally anything, (except republican) I raised kids who are straight but not narrow. Actual allies. Because their world has always included LGBTQ+ people who simply existed in our world along with the rest of everybody else. There were no religious exemptions in our house.

My definitions of obscenity may not be yours. I have zero issue with most pornography, tics, fetishes, proclivities or kinks. Consent is sexy and required. Past that, have fun you crazy adults! But I will shame a political fetish that sexualizes and marginalizes innocent young beings who are simply and beautifully telling us who they are. I knew who I was by the time I was THREE! My guardians tried to beat it out of me, literally, metaphorically and otherwise. I’ve been gaslit by the best, and it’s no way to raise a Magic Child.

Y’all might wish I had gone ahead and killed myself, as so many of our beautiful youngsters do, but I . And I am tired, and I am MAD, and I am NOT the only one. You don’t like me “putting it up in your face?” The shit you’ve held up in my face all these years is putrid, friend. I’m not happy, either. Maybe stop with your face metaphors already?

So, Dear Reader, I ask you to join me in my verbal resistance as we label this bullshit behavior until it is over and spread these words:

Don’t be a children’s genital fetishist!

Be better.

Peace, Lovelies

- MM