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How To Roll a Joint Like a Boss

Don't bother using a cigarette rolling friend, cone joint paper, or even the dreaded pre-rolling machine, when you've got your own hand and fingers to learn how to roll a joint.

By Alfred TaerzPublished 6 years ago 6 min read
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It's easier than you might think, but that doesn't mean you'll be rolling pearls within seconds (that is, unless you're somehow born with exceptional skill). Plus, there's a variety of ways one can craft a joint: oversized, flag, tipped, basic, cone, backrolled, the list goes on and on. My personal all-time favorite, right behind the unbeatable quality of blunts, is the cross joint, but save that delicatessen for 4/20 to appease the weed Gods.

There isn't all that much to it, other than the right tools, a positive attitude, and maybe even a little early puff, puff to test out the nerves. To get a J that's not only Potent certified, but actually has a quality hit that burns as slow as possible, follow these steps on how to roll a joint before becoming too lost in the sauce to even roll your own head from side to side.

Step 1: Rolling into Preparation

Whoever said, "By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail," definitely knew how to roll a joint; why else would they make such an articulate observation?

All jokes aside, when preparing to rock your socks off with a J-bird like none before, being properly prepared is paramount. The effects you'll need are: grinder (preferably already jam packed with grainy greens), rolling papers, crutch (also known as a filter) if necessary, and why not throw in a rolling tray, every stoner needs one!

Step 2: Grinding It Out

Grind up the damn weed if you haven't already! What are you waiting for, me to say something? Pulverize as much of that shit as you think will fit inside the joint—it's literally that simple.

Don't forget (because I almost always do) to check the bottom-most compartment on you grinder, if you have one of course. It's always an added bonus for us stoners to sprinkle a little kief into the mix, and is no different if you're leaning how to roll a joint, too.

Step 3: All About the Paper

Easy to use rolling papers are neither difficult to find nor expensive in any way. I recommend using a simpler canvas, only because it thwarts continual failure and also boosts your skills in half the time.

For instance, EZ Wider's are one of my instant go-to's, but most of my friends shy away from them, literally because of their easier to roll simplicity! Another obvious one is RAW hemp rolling papers, but it really comes down to preference and is extremely dependent on the roller— which would be you, if you were unsure.

Step 4: Filter the Bullshit

Here's another example of when the roller is in full control of the process. You don't need a filter. It doesn't really benefit the final result, other than making the J a smoother hit that isn't full of dreaded "Scooby snacks," or loose grains of weed. If you want my opinion, I tend to skip this step, because:

  1. Non-filtered joints last longer, trust me dog, it's airflow,
  2. Why waste time on an unnecessary step that only adds less time to your smoking? The math just don't add up, and
  3. Filters either fall out anyway or just get in the way.

When learning how to roll a joint, I advise ignoring the filter altogether, but that's just me.

Step 5: Sprinkling the Marijuana

Once you get enough courage, sparse the marijuana down the center of you preferred rolling paper and then make sure it's not too much, nor too little.

Okay, this may seem like some mundane task, but when learning how to roll a joint, it's imperative you add the weed with some care. You could end up destroying your joint midway while rolling if you accidentally add a stem or seed, which has happened to me on countless occasions. The point being: pay attention when adding weed, or you may find yourself starting all over.

Step 6: It's All in the Tuck

Almost like rubbing two pennies together, tuck the side that's without adhesive over the mountain of weed in the joint, effectively curling the paper up in slow, successive motions.

I'm telling you not to rush this process—even though I know you will. It's the most important, yet complicated point in the steps to learning how to roll a joint.

Step 7: Roll It All Up

This one's a killer. Getting the paper to stick and remain firmly in place, while also making sure as little weed as possible falls out of the paper, is by far the most annoying process. Keep in mind, your first jimmy jawn is not gonna be a golden diamond. Accept the learning process, and just take it slow. If you have to practice first, use tobacco so you don't waste your valuable product.

Sure to frustrate you, possibly even deter you from learning how to roll a joint entirely, roll the damn paper up so that you're left with a perfectly round stick, almost like a cigarette. Make sure weed and kief both remain securely packed within, before finally sealing the paper ends. You should be left with a mouthpiece and an open-end filled of budding green magic.

Step 8: Stocking Stuffer

Pack the remaining bits and grains deeper into the joint. Try to fit in as much as you can before tying the knot, and get your trusty kief out for an added dose of green sprinkles on top.

Best way to do this is by using a pen, iPhone headphone jack, or a dull pair of scissors. Don't use something sharp, like a knife, or you'll most likely damage the finished material, which would be unfortunate, especially since we're so close to the end in how to roll a joint.

Step 9: It's Lit!

Now, I really don't know what the hell it is you think you're doing if that shit ain't lit right about now. Are you hoping it spontaneously combusts?

Grab a lighter and spark that shit up, my dude. You deserve it after going through the whirlwind process of how to roll a joint, stressful as it is with that half empty bag of Doritos in your face and your friend's half-audible snoring-conversation filling your mind. Ahhh that's it, sit back, bump some tunes, and roast that personally hand-crafted joint to your heart's content. You're welcome.

Wiz definitely knows best when it comes to supplying you with the perfect high tunes anyone can find, so would it be that much different when learning how to roll a joint? Doubtful.

That's why I've added his "How to Roll a Perfect Joint" YouTube video, in which the rapper himself, slightly high in his hot tub, explores the steps he personally takes when rolling a joint. It shouldn't be rocket science, so if you want some more tips and tricks, or even a good pointer after undergoing this valuable step-by-step process, try Wiz Khalifa's unbeatable formula.

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About the Creator

Alfred Taerz

English psycho therapist. I like to help people and oftentimes do, when people take my advice seriously. It's all in the mind, you'll see...

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