A smart woman can lock a man's heart by "asking"

I have seen such a question on the Internet: "What is the basis for a person to fall in love with another person?"

Is it the appearance? Is it character? Is it low? Is it wealth?

It's neither.

There is a story in The Little Prince by French writer Exupery:

The little prince lived on a small planet. One day, a beautiful rose suddenly appeared on the planet. The little prince had never seen such a beautiful flower, so he took good care of it every day.

He thought it was the most beautiful flower in the whole universe, no one could compare with it.

Then one day when he came to the Earth, he found a garden with 5000 almost identical roses. At that moment, he knew that the rose he had carefully cared for was just an ordinary flower. He was very sad, but in spite of this, he could not put down his own rose, and he could not understand why.

Then one day the little fox said to him, "Your rose is beautiful because you spent time and effort on it."

The little prince suddenly realized that although there were countless roses in the world, the rose on his planet was still unique. Because he has watered it, protected it, spoken with it, silent with it... So it was his unique rose.

So you know what it means to love someone?

Yes! It's the effort. It's the investment.

Many smart girls know this, so no matter what their own value, they know that the secret of making men love themselves is to guide men to pay for themselves and invest in themselves.

They understand the unavailability of giving, but also understand the importance of asking boys. From a human point of view, the root of love is in line with the Franklin effect.

What is the Franklin effect?

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It comes from this story:

"

One day in 1736 Franklin addressed the Pennsylvania House of Representatives.

Another senator totally disagreed with Franklin. He made a speech in which he criticized Franklin very strongly. Franklin was caught off guard, but he wanted to win the senator's approval. What to do?

He accidentally learned that the Congressman had a very rare collection of books in his house. So he wrote a very respectful letter and shamelessly asked the senator for a book. Unexpectedly, the senator agreed, and Franklin solemnly thanked him when he returned the book.

When they met again in the chamber a few days later, Franklin wrote: "He actually made himself available to greet me (as he had never done before), and when we talked afterwards, he offered to serve me at any time."

From then on, the two became friends and remained friends for the rest of their lives.

This story was first recorded in Carnegie's book The Frailty of Man.

Later, in 1993, the famous American psychologist Eliot Aronson wrote this story into his book Social Psychology. So later psychologists came to a conclusion:

The best way to get people to like you is not to help them, but to let them help you.

This is where the famous "Franklin" effect comes from.

Then the same is true in love, want to make a boy like you or let a boy love you more, the best way is not to double his good, but to ask him for, that is, to guide him to invest for you.

One father understood this very well and applied the Frank effect to his daughter's emotional problems.

The daughter asked her father, "How do I get the guy I like to like me?"

Father said, "Ask him to buy you an ice cream."

The daughter asked, "Then what?"

The father said, "Let him buy another one."

This seemingly simple troublesome boy's behavior of buying ice cream, in fact, subtly planted the seed of "careful care" in the boy's heart, he will think: "What flavor does she like to eat?" What color do you like? Do you like the big one or the small one? Which one do you like best?"

Invisible for this girl to pay time, energy, feelings and money, the little girl has become a unique rose in the hearts of boys.

When the boy asks himself why he is willing to buy ice cream for the girl, even if the girl is nothing, the subconscious will tell him that: because the girl is cute, sensible, laughter is sweet and so on.

Love is sometimes so simple, in the process of paying, in the process of investment slowly fell in love.

Therefore, the best way to make a boy like you and fall in love with you is to trouble him, that is, to "take" from him appropriately while giving.

So how do we "take" cleverly?

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Specific operation

① Use trouble to infiltrate the subconscious like

At a college party, I had to take a taxi to leave first, and the taxi driver asked me, "Why don't you ask your male classmate to drive you?" I said, "I don't want to bother him."

The driver said in an intriguing tone: "Be sure to learn to trouble boys...". And then bala Bala told me all about it.

At that time, I felt nothing, and then I knew that the girls who would trouble the boys were really too smart, and their trouble boys from time to time was instilling the idea of "I like her" from the subconscious.

So, don't feel shy about asking a guy to pay for a first date, especially if you have a crush on a guy, many times this is the key to getting him to like you.

On the first date, you can try to get a guy to pick you up, which is what a gentleman guy would do. If he doesn't ask to pick you up, you can say, "I'm a little far from where we agreed to go, so could you come and pick me up?"

In the follow-up contact and understanding, you should also trouble the boys.

For example, the light bulb at home is broken, the computer reaction speed is slow, you can ask him to help: "I tried to fix it, please come and help me look at it, OK?" You know everything, so you can teach me."

You can repeat the "trouble" this remedy, but not too often, everything has a limit, too much will cause the other party's aversion.

Bother your partner once or twice a month.

② Set rules for asking

In the relationship, many girls belong to the paying personality, always keen to be good to boys, and pay for each other to obtain a sense of existence and pleasure.

As everyone knows, in the feelings or occasionally do a girl can get the love of boys more.

As Zhang Ailing said: "Love a person to the extent of asking him for pocket money, that is a strict test." The greatest trust a woman can have in a man is to be able to ask for something without any scruples."

If you are used to giving for others, and really don't know where to start to ask each other, then you can make a "ask" rule for yourself.

For example, you can write down a small task every week in a notebook or notepad on your phone: you want to ask the other person to do something for you.

It can be to buy you a portion of your favorite fruit, it can also be to trouble the other party to pick you up from work, it can also let the other party to help you send an umbrella on a rainy day and so on.

In short, it is to guide the other party to spend time, energy, money for you to invest, careful care, and eventually you will become the unique rose in his mind.

We love a person because of giving, without giving, there can be no love.

So trouble boys, know how to timely ask boys, guide each other to invest for you, he will fall in love with you little by little until you can't leave.

Sometimes the mentality of a man to a woman is like investing in a stock, the more invested in the relationship, the less easy it is to withdraw.

The smart women that men want know that.

She knows how to give for love, but also knows how to take in time.

~end~

If you have any ideas, feel free to leave them in the comments section.

~This is Antoine, and I hope you find pleasure in each of my articles~