The Dog Ate My Homework

The dog ate my homework, and I wish I could say this is the first time it's happened but it isn't and I'm sure it's far from the last. My dog's name is Duck. Why Duck you ask? Well maybe you should ask my little brother Timmy because the only reason I can think a five-year-old would name a dog Duck is either A. He really likes ducks or B. He thinks the dog IS a duck. Either way when he came up with the name neither of my parents had the heart to correct him so now was Duck the dog, our new family pet. My parents got him just a couple of months ago because they figured it would teach my little brother and I some responsibility, but also just because everyone in our family had been dying to get a dog. That is until the eating of my homework started happening. And I know what you're thinking, the same thing everyone else thinks when I tell them the dog ate my homework, that I'm making it up all because I don't want to do my homework. Well, I am sorry to disappoint you but that could not be farther from the truth in my case. You see I am now a freshman in high school and I have always gotten good grades. ALWAYS. And now that I'm officially in high school it's important now more than ever that I maintain those grades so I can get into a good college and never have to see the mean self-absorbed kids at my school ever again. That's not exactly going to work if I fail half my classes and get held back. So of course when this started happening the first week I was horrified. At first, I thought I was imagining things, maybe I lost it, maybe Timmy put it somewhere he shouldn't have, both unlikely since they've never happened before but also not impossible. When I asked my parents about it they said they hadn't seen my homework anywhere and when I told the teachers I lost it they gave me a stern nod but let me make up the work...the first time. Then when it kept happening my mom started asking me if anything was wrong, my dad expressed how he was disappointed in me and all my teachers threatened to give me detention. It was so messed up, I have never done anything like this before and no one believed me when I said it wasn't my fault. That's when I discovered the truth. One day I decided to search the whole house to see if I could find where all my homework had mysteriously disappeared to and there he was. Duck the dog sitting in the corner of the laundry room with paper sticking out of his mouth. The second he saw me he just sat there staring at me because he knew that I knew what was going on. It was the longest staring contest I have ever had, and with a dog at that. Talk about the weirdest moment of my life. "Mom!" I ran to go tell my mom and the dog is running right behind me. "Mom the dog's been eating my homework, that's why it keeps disappearing, he's been eating it. Bad dog, bad dog!"

"Hey! Come on you really expect me to believe that. I was a teenager once too you know and that is the oldest excuse in the book. What is going on with you lately?"

"Mom I'm telling the truth. I saw him do it, Duck had paper in his mouth. It was my homework!"

"You know what that's enough you are officially grounded. And I don't want to hear another word about this do you understand me."

"But mom-"

"No, but's Mr. go to your room right now!"

I could have cried. My mom really didn't believe me. I've never done anything like this ever in my life and she doesn't believe me. Granted if I were her I probably wouldn't believe me either. The cute little dog could never do something that bad. But how am I going to prove that he did do it? I ran back to the laundry room where I had seen Duck sitting with the paper in his mouth. Maybe there is some paper that got left behind. Once I get in there I search the floor and the piles of laundry to see if I can find any evidence. There are little bits of paper here and there but not enough to prove anything. How else am I going to get any evidence? I know mom and dad have this camera that they haven't used in a while that I can put in the laundry room, and catch the crime as it happens. The only thing is I don't remember where the camera is. I started looking around when I bumped into my dad.

"Oh hey dad, um do you know where the camera is?"

"The camera...oh I think we sold it a while ago, why do you need it?"

"Ugh really, no reason nevermind."

I sadly drag myself my room trying to figure out just how I would prove my innoccence. Let's think. Well, I can't record him doing it, there is not enough paper to prove it's my homework in the laundry room...So I either have to catch him in the act and one of my parents witness it or I have to find the paper, as it comes out. Of my dog. Ew.

For weeks I kept trying to catch Duck in the act while my parents were around but I was never successful. Dangit that dog is good. Welp, I never thought I would have to reduce myself to this but here we go. It's time to get...dirty. Oh I'm dreading this. So one day I volunteered to take the dog out and paid close attention to every time he took a squat. EVERY TIME. It was so beneath me and disgusting I'll spare you of most of the details. Long story short we were at this for, a while. At first, it was almost like Duck new what I was up to and didn't go but finally when he did I was all over it. I just stood there and miticulously inspected every inch of it when I heard my little brother call out:

"Austin playing with poop!"

To my horror, my whole family was standing on the porch looking at me in complete shock. Even though they obviously wanted to know what was going on I was not allowed to give an explanation. I was grounded for about a week and was not allowed to take the dog out for even longer. So my solution, I now get two copies of all my homework. Sometimes I outsmart the dog with it, sometimes he still outsmarts me. It's an ongoing battle that I am determined one day to win. Hopefully, before I go to college. Only time will tell.