An Ode to R2D2

You remember the sequence from The Empire Strikes Back where the gang leaves the snow world? Most of the gang ends up trying to flee from the Empire, but Luke goes off on his own to meet up with a Jedi Master. Except, he doesn't really go alone, does he?

When Luke Skywalker runs off to learn Jedi tricks from a puppet, he brings R2D2 with him.

My dog is my R2 unit.

Since getting her, my dog and I have changed which country we live in. Together, my dog and I have driven about 20,000 kilometres. Some of those kilometres have included other passengers in our vehicle. Most of them have not.

One morning, she and I were headed out on a trip, and I could have sworn that we were living in a scene set on that snowy world. Beyond the windows of our car, it was dark. Heavy fog prevented us from seeing more than ten meters ahead of us, and snow melted in beads on the windshield.

"Very scary," I said to my dog.

You know how R2D2 only communicates through beeps and whistles? Yeah, my dog is like that too. So when I said, "Very scary," she whimpered a little and then lay down. But we had somewhere we needed to be. We needed it enough that even though it was December, we were on the road. It was the end of 2019, and I had no idea how metaphorically resonant that fog would be when I looked back on that trip later.

Truly, we had no idea what we were driving into.

But we drove slowly. I knew that I could pull over if things got to rough, and if I did I could walk my dog and think and wait for the weather to improve. After several hours of gruelling driving, we took our first break at a coffee shop, and I walked my dog along the side of the road, relieved and happy to have made it so far.

It wasn't the first trip like that we went on. It hasn't been the last. Together, we've gone to different countries, we've crossed continents, and we've gone through countless drive-through windows.

Why is she so good at going through customs between Canada and the USA? Because she's a border collie, har har har.

Now, as I type this up, she is sitting next to me, and for the better part of the past year, it's just been me and her.

None of us would have chosen for the past two years to go the way they have. Many people have gone for months or even years without seeing their loved ones. We've lost people. We've lost people to the disease, and we've lost people because the disease has shown some differences to be irreconcilable. I think back to the holiday season of 2019, looking into the future and building plans. None of those plans panned out. The people I was with at the time aren't with me any longer.

As we rang in 2020 with hope for that future, we danced. We couldn't know what was coming. Outside a few disease specialists, none of us could know what was coming.

So we danced.

I danced with the people I loved, and my dog was with me.

She had been with me months before, when we went hiking in the mountains of Colorado. She would be with me still in the future, when our world shrank down to the size of one basement. And on New Years Eve, at the end of 2019, she was with me too.

That holiday season, I drove over 3,000 miles to be with the people I loved. I didn't trust the vehicle I owned, so I rented a car, and I neglected to mention that there would be a dog riding in the back seat. I fully expected to be charged an extra cleaning cost, but I did vacuum out the car before I returned it, and they never mentioned it. Sorry, by the way, to every car rental company I've ever used. I never told you about the dog, but to be fair, you never explicitly asked, and you did charge me an arm and a leg, so let's call it even?

We drove because I hate flying. And we drove because flights were wildly expensive since the plan came together at the last minute. And we drove because, even though it would only be about two weeks, I didn't want to be separated from my dog.

So much changed after that New Years Eve.

I hope that this is the Dark Moment. If we are in Joseph Campbell's monomyth, this better be the bottom of that circle, and things better turn towards the better soon. When I danced at the end of 2019 and the start of 2020, Wuhan and Coronavirus had yet to enter my vocabulary. Masks had yet to enter my wardrobe. You know the sort of scene. Luke Skywalker is watching the sunset and thinking about the future. There are problems out there--and they're big problems, too--but they haven't come home yet.

I hope that there is a conclusion to this story that is satisfying. I hope we all see growth, and I hope we use this disaster as an opportunity to grow in empathy and compassion across our communities. The new normal should be marked with justice and a more equitable society. I hope some of us emerge from this story better for all the things we've learned across the way.

But we're not there yet. At least, I'm not.

I'm on my own. Kinda. My human companionship has diminished, but I still have my R2 unit.

So I take some comfort from the fact that when Luke Skywalker was in the uneasy middle of his story, he was often alone too. When he went off to grow and change and learn, he took with him a companion who couldn't speak but could communicate through whistles and beeps.

I have one companion too.

I'm a loner by nature. It took time to realize that I wasn't as much of a loner as I thought. I still am a loner--I really am. I'm perfectly happy driving for 12 hours, only stopping for gas, bathroom breaks, and snacks. But if I'm going to make that drive, I'd like my dog to be with me. I like going for my adventure with my R2 unit in the back seat for when I need her.

At the end of 2019, my R2 unit and I drove thousands of miles so we could spend New Years Eve dancing badly with the people who we love.

At the end of 2021, we played the same song to ring in a different year. I looked at my dog, and she looked back at me with her bright brown eyes. I said, "Up!" And she stood on her hind legs, propping herself against me with her front legs, her mouth open in a doggy grin.

I said, "Dance!"

Grabbing her paws, grinning like idiots, we danced.

As much as I hate how everything has changed in the past few years, I know that I'm not entirely alone as long as I have her. And that's the great thing about dogs, isn't it? We don't love them because they can learn tricks (although she can dance!) and we don't love them because they're soft (although she is so fluffy!).

We love them because they love us.

When this ends and the world is safer, we will be out on the roads again. Who knows? Maybe we'll be able to afford a reliable car next time, so we won't need a rental car. I do not know where we will go, and I do not know what people (if any people at all) will be waiting for us at that destination. But I do know that we will go, my dog and I, and we'll face whatever adventures wait for us together.

If you enjoyed this post, please consider checking out some of my other writing. If you like what you see, I'd appreciate it if you left a like and subscribed.