Chinese marriage status: insecure woman + man running away from family responsibilities

"I have no sense of security", it seems that many women have had such complaints in marriage, how to have a sense of security in marriage, how to establish a sense of security in marriage? Many people feel powerless about it.

So what exactly is security?

Usually, security is a feeling, a psychology; It's how one person's performance makes the other feel; Is a kind of people can be assured, can be comfortable, can rely on, can trust the mannerisms and other aspects of performance.

The sense of security is mainly reflected in two aspects:

1. Spiritual aspect:

When a person cannot get enough sense of security from the other person emotionally, they will pursue material sense of security to resist the lack of mental or emotional sense of security

2. Material level:

When a person pursues material enjoyment, his/her sense of security will decline when his/her material requirements are not fully satisfied. In this case, he/she will pursue a new substitute in spirit to satisfy his/her lack of security in material aspects.

Most of the time, emotional and material security is difficult for a person to get at the same time, and through marriage to enhance the security, is the most willing way for most people.

Both men and women spend their lives searching for something called security. When a couple is not equal in material and status, it is easy to ask such questions: the woman will keep asking the man "do you still love me?" Through his answer, to confirm their own safety factor; Or a sense of security by keeping a tight grip on economic power and the whereabouts of each other; Even, will be vexatious, no quarrel, is also through the compromise of men to find a sense of security.

However, this does not really reduce their inner insecurity.

2

Psychologist Maslow said that security is one of the most basic psychological needs of human beings. Especially for a woman, whether she feels safe or not will directly affect her life.

Insecurity has become a ticking time bomb in intimate relationships, which can be fatal to lovers at any time.

Film was abandon pine nuts life, pine nuts in all my life looking for love, when he was young because my father prefer sick sister, pine nut only made faces when the father can laugh, thus formed the habit of making a face when anxiety, formed the pleasing personality, thus setback in later life.

When Matsuko grew up, she still did not give up the pursuit of love. Even if her boyfriend abused her, or her boyfriend stole her property, she chose to forgive her without bottom line. In such a close relationship, she is on the premise of sacrificing herself to fulfill each other in exchange for love.

She paid a lot, but the harvest is very little, can not stop the selfless dedication, no bottom line spoil and tolerance, humble to love, until finally because of love and lost themselves.

Although it is portrayed in the movie, it is also the epitome of many women in real life. Most women do everything in their marriage to get attention and love from their partner.

3

Both men and women have problems with "security", just to different degrees.

For men, they pay more attention to their physical needs and the need to be respected, and this need to be respected is often expressed through the pursuit of career achievement.

Women tend to focus more on their safety needs and emotional needs, so when it comes to intimate relationships, women are eager for men to listen, but men are less prone to this.

As a result, both men and women are more or less insecure in their intimate relationships.