You Don't Get What You Deserve, You Get What You Negotiate

When people think about negotiations, they think of business deals. However, negotiations are made in life. Many times we get certain things because we have negotiated for them without knowing we have done so.

Let's discuss negotiation in business first before proving that we have negotiated for everything we have ever gotten whether we realized it or not.

Negotiation: Definition

Negotiation is the act of trying to work out an agreement between parties when each wants something out of the deal. To negotiate means to bargain with someone to get what you want while trying to give that person what he also wants. Negotiation involves a give and a take as well as a compromise.

Negotiation in Business

Some people in businesses claim to be excellent when it comes to negotiating. In fact, Dr. Chester L. Karrass has a book on Amazon called The Bible of Negotiation. Karrass is known as the leading expert in demonstrating how to successfully negotiate in any business.

The author has developed programs and exercises to help people negotiate no matter what business they are in. The book aims to please by showing how both parties can get what they want when they negotiate effectively.

Karrass explains that it might be challenging for some people to negotiate, but it can make a big difference between succeeding and failing in business and in life.

Negotiation in Life

It is unfortunate that we do not get what we deserve. Instead, we get only what we negotiate. All of life is a negotiation. Married couples negotiate all the time. Teenagers negotiate with their parents to use the family car, to get spending money, for longer curfews, and a number of other pleasures.

Just as the success of a business depends on negotiations, so does having a comfortable lifestyle. We might not have to deal with annual budgets and business plans, but we do have to deal with establishing mission statements, setting goals and objectives in life just as executives have to do in business.

Some people are better at negotiating than others, but everyone can benefit from learning the principles of good negotiation.

Tips For Effective Negotiating in Business and in Life

Aim High But Not Too High. The more you ask for, the more you’ll get. However, be realistic and reasonable. Don't go overboard by being too greedy. You might lose everything that way.

Be Prepared. Know what you want and what the deal-breakers are. Calculate the benefits of getting what you want compared to what you are not willing to accept.

Don't Rush the Process. Avoid making hasty decisions. You might be taken advantage of if the other person knows you are under time constraints. You might be rushed into agreeing to something you don't want.

Don't Make the First Offer. In most negotiations, the one who makes the first offer usually ends up with less. When possible, let the other person make the offer first. However, that is not always possible.

Be Prepared to Give Up. Sometimes your desired outcome is just not attainable and you have to give up. If both of you end up in a stalemate, don't feel bad about walking away. Some deals might not be worth wasting your time.

Negotiating Without Trying

We don't always get what we deserve. Instead, we negotiate by following the above guidelines. Then there are times we negotiate when we are not trying or even being aware that we are doing it. How can that be?

You might be qualified for a high-paying job, but you might not get it even though you deserve it. That's because you have negotiated in certain ways that did not appeal to the interviewer. For instance, you might have negotiated negatively by your appearance, by your body language, or by the way you talked. Interviewers are trained to look out for those things and negotiate with you even though you don't realize it.

The same things might happen when you go on a first date. You are negotiating even though you or the other person never mentions the word. Your attitude, personality, warmth, and general disposition negotiate on your behalf.

Those are some of the reasons you don't get what you deserve. Instead, you get what you negotiate!