6 Reasons to Leave a Tip at a Restaurant

Visit any sit-down restaurant and the conversation will turn to the tip before the meal is over. How much is enough or too much? If service was less than expected, should we leave a tip? What do we do if the tip is part of the tab and we aren’t happy?

Tipping is no longer associated with restaurants. It’s creeping into other parts of life. Parking valets, bartenders, taxi drivers, Uber drivers, delivery drivers are people we tip. And tip jars sit on fast-food restaurants, coffee shops, and hair salon counters. It seems people are expecting a tip anytime they give personal service.

Some people leave tips because it’s a custom. Others leave one because they feel they have to or they're embarrassed if they don’t. But everyone feels pressure to tip.

Here are six good reasons to tip and one reason not to

Does tipping really compliment the server and staff?

People know restaurant owners pay a low wage to their service staff. So customers tip to show they appreciate their server’s excellent service. The waiter’s pay becomes a joint venture. The employer pays a base wage, and the customer gives their waiter a bonus. If the server performs well, there is a corresponding tip. And if service is bad, the punishment is little or no tip.

Does tipping guarantee better future service?

In a small community, a server might remember you. So being a heavy tipper might affect your treatment when you come back. But most servers are busy and can’t afford to take a lot of time with each customer.

A servers' job is to take orders then deliver what’s ordered as fast as possible. Help customers during the meal and then move them out the door so the table is available for the next customer.

Leaving a big tip will help the server’s income, but it won’t guarantee you’ll get better service the next time you visit. The way servers make more money is to serve more customers. And they will make more money serving people than they will by giving extra time and effort to one customer.

If you want to help your server make more money, leave when you finish your meal and don’t linger. When you leave your table, someone takes your place. It’s called in the restaurant industry “flipping tables”. The more tables flipped, the more tips paid.

Do people tip to avoid embarrassment?

No one enjoys embarrassment. And coming across as being cheap is embarrassing. One way of appearing stingy is by not leaving a tip or leaving a small one.

The other side is that businesses can look greedy by asking for tips. I don’t mind leaving a tip for service. But it makes me uncomfortable when I’m picking up a pizza and there is a tip jar next to the register. I feel there is no extra level of service when I’m picking something up. I don’t tip the grocery store clerk or the gas station attendant. It’s because I feel I gathered the groceries and pumped the gas.

To add pressure to drop some change in the tip jar, there is a handwritten note on it that says, “Tips are appreciated. It’s for our employees' college expenses.” That’s a nice little twist of the guilt knife. Who doesn’t want to help young people with their education?

When it’s time to pay, the jar gets all the focus. The teller hands back change over the top of the tip jar, as if implying “just drop the change in the jar”. And I don’t want to look the cashier in the eye for fear I’ll get a critical look back.

But is it even true? Is my change going to pay college bills, or is it a way to pick up change that’s one step above begging? And there is always some change and a couple of dollar bills in the jar. It makes me wonder if customers left tips, or did the business seed the jar to encourage people to tip via guilt. Either way, it works. I’ve left tips because I wanted to avoid feeling embarrassed and not because I wanted to or felt they deserved it.

People tip because it’s customary and not because it’s required.

Everyone leaves a tip. As children, when we ate out with our parents, they left a tip for the server. And now that we are adults, we do the same and our children watch us. And one day they will do the same with their kids. It’s an economic cycle of life.

Do you tip because you want to or because it’s expected?

Tipping is so common that it feels like it’s required. Eat at a restaurant and on the bill is a place for a tip. Check out electronically, and there’s a screen to leave a tip. You can leave the line on the ticket blank or skip to the next screen, but you won’t. You know you‘re not required to give a tip, but it’s expected.

Don’t tip because you feel forced. Tip because it feels good.

Of all the reasons to leave a tip, the best is because it makes you feel good. Anytime we can help another person, we should.

Servers work hard. I worked in restaurants. It’s a lot of rushing and never feeling caught up. Then there are the customers. Most are great, but some test the finest servers. But a good server will do the best job possible to make guests feel happy.

After eating and enjoying time together, and with the server, it feels good to leave a tip.

Don’t tip if the server abuses you or your family

Some people will say you should always leave a tip. But people need to be accountable. And just because they do a job doesn’t mean they deserve a bonus.

If a server is running behind because of too many customers, that isn’t the server's fault. Of if you have to wait in line for 30 minutes or an hour, that is your choice. If there are reasonable delays, the server should keep you informed. And you shouldn’t punish the server by not leaving a tip.

But servers who are rude, meanspirited, or take their frustration out on you or your family, don’t deserve a tip. They are employees, and for a brief amount of time, they work for you and the restaurant. And they need to act like professionals — even when they feel stressed.

There are two things that should happen when a server is unprofessional. The first is they should not receive a tip. The second is their employer should know how the person acted and why there would be no tip.

Final Thoughts

I worked in restaurants for several years. It is a challenging line of work, and the pay is low. I want tips to go away. Servers should earn a decent and competitive salary. That will not happen soon.

Whether I tip to compliment the staff, or because I’m embarrassed not to, I tip because it is the right thing to do.

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6 Reasons to Leave a Tip at a Restaurant originally published on Medium