To the Man Who Took My Picture

It was December 23rd, the day before Christmas Eve, and the store was hectic. I was on my way to go home when my manager asked if I could give the closing self-checkout attendant a break since he was stuck in a check stand.

Of course, I said yes and took over for her. Standing at the podium, I took out my phone to look through my notes, and that’s when you appeared.

You took a picture of me then proceeded to yell at me because I was on my phone “texting” when there’s a long line of customers waiting to check out, and we had only one cashier. I tried to defend myself the best way I knew how, but it didn’t help.

You should have asked yourself, “what kind of day did she have?” before you attacked me.

You have no idea what kind of day I had before you came shopping, even though I doubt you would have cared.

You seem like you’re the type of man who thinks only of himself, and everything must revolve around you.

Of course, that is just my perception of your childish personality. I’ll give you a recap of how my day went before you came along.

I work on self-checkout; I deal with six robots alerting me for help all at the same time. Customers on each robot demand I stop what I’m doing to run and help them.

If I don’t and I continue assisting the customer I was helping before them, they grow impatient and become snotty, because heaven forbid, they wait about two minutes.

There were long lines to check out for a few reasons. Reason 1: We were swamped because it was the DAY BEFORE Christmas Eve, which is essentially a holiday.

You can’t expect the DAY BEFORE Christmas Eve not to be busy. Reason 2: We were shorthanded, which is why the lines to check out were long.

We had three cashiers, and two-baggers call out, and one of those cashiers happened to be our closing cashier, so that left the closing manager as the closing cashier.

I didn’t get a break at all during my shift. I worked for seven hours, and I didn’t get one break. During my seven-hour shift, I dealt with one rude customer after another nonstop.

Do you know how it feels to be snapped at by people over things that are out of your control for seven hours? It sucks. You know what else sucks and is also painful? Standing on the hard grocery store floor for seven hours with no break when you have neuropathy in your legs and feet.

When I was verbally attacked while giving a break on self-checkout.

While standing at the self-checkout podium, giving the closing attendant a break, I took out my phone to look through my notes. You came up, took a picture of me on your phone then yelled at me.

“There is a long line of people waiting to check out, and there’s only one cashier open, and you’re here texting. And why on earth would you guys close the other self-checkout when there’s a line of people waiting to check out?”

I did my best to stay professional while defending myself since I wasn’t going to let someone like you take my picture and yell at me over something you were clueless about.

For a reminder, this is how our exchange went.

“I’m not even supposed to be here; I’m just giving a break. And I closed the other self-checkout since it closes at 9 pm because the Westside doors close at 9 pm.”

“Well, I hope that’s policy because I’ll be happy to show it to you.”

“Okay…”

“I’ll be sure to spread your picture around social media.”

“That’s mature of you, sir, Merry Christmas to you.”

I never understood why everyone becomes so vicious during the holidays.

Here is the real reason I was on my phone. And no, I wasn’t texting.

Sir, do you even know the reason I was on my phone? You claim I was texting on my phone, but I wasn’t, I was looking at my notes that were on my phone.

I am chronically ill and a chronic pain sufferer, I was looking at my notes to see when I was able to take my medication and pain pill.

I try to manage my pain by taking my pain meds and other medication at work, but it’s kind of hard to do that when you work your whole shift without any breaks.

So, I was looking at my notes on my phone to see when I took my medication last, to be able to know if I could take a pain pill at that time.

Because you thought I was texting since that’s all you can do on a cell phone, apparently, you chose to yell at me and take my picture.

You know, you could have just asked why I was on my phone when there was a long line of customers waiting to check out. I would have been happy to tell you why, so you knew I had a legitimate reason to be on my phone.

Management has their phone out all the time, and they walk around the store texting on their phones. Do you go up to them to take their picture and yell at them for being on their phone?

No, you don’t because they’re in management and they’re all men.

Since I’m a woman and I’m not in management, you felt being a man you had the upper hand and was justified in taking my picture and verbally assaulting me in front of a lot of people.

Why does the holiday season bring out everyone’s inner demon?

I never understood why everyone becomes so vicious during the holidays. The holiday season is supposed to be about love, caring, and thankfulness.

It’s considered the most wonderful time of the year after all Andy Williams has a song titled after it. Unfortunately, not everyone looks at the holiday season as being the most wonderful time of the year.

Reasons being, money could be tight throughout the year, and when the holidays roll around, finances become tighter, and we’re not sure how we’re going to be able to afford Christmas for our families. Our job has us working crazy hours, over the weekends, working overtime.

Or, like me, you work in retail, and you must deal with customers who are cranky assholes that feel they are entitled to whatever they want, including yelling at the retail employees.

Just like you, sir, you chose to take a picture of me at my place of employment without my consent, then yell at me over something you knew nothing about.

We must remember to put ourselves in other people’s shoes.

We have no idea what’s going on in other people’s lives, and we don’t know what kind of day other people have had.

So that’s why we need to remember to put ourselves in other people’s shoes. It’s a way of having compassion for other people and to show kindness.

I felt awful after that man yelled at me and took my picture. Not only was I embarrassed to be verbally attacked like that in front of a lot of people, and in my place of employment, I felt like I was nothing.

Nothing to the point where he thought it was perfectly acceptable to treat me that way.

I would never want to make someone feel like that, so I always remember to treat retail workers or anyone who is helping me with respect.

We all want to be shown respect and to be treated kindly, but if you treat other people disrespectfully who have done nothing to you, then you have no right to expect other people to show you kindness and respect. That is something you must earn.