2020 seemed like decades ago now.....Cause we've all changed alot, our lives, friends, family, work, everything... am I right!? Well before 2020, I ended up in the ER with an open hand surgery on Christmas Eve of 2019, then following I was on bed rest for two weeks. Then let's just say that nasty word happened that is all over the news and still disrupts our daily lives....I'm over the whole situation and just don't want to simply let it drain my energy anymore. I think sometimes the best thing is to take back your own power, do your own thing, live the damn best life possible.
Throughout the past two years I am however grateful. I am grateful for many reasons. I started to walk away from things that didn't serve me, I walked away from situations that didn't see my worth, I started LIVING !! Funny, previously I lived the "successful" and achievement filled life that everyone strived to have. Life in the fast lane, among some of the biggest names in the world. Yet a lot was missing...... Yeah I get it poor me lol. Don't worry, I know what you're already thinking.
Since 2020 I have begun to see everything that was important again. Because when the world doesn't make sense everything becomes more clear. To take the time to enjoy your life and slow down, or you simply might miss it. Now as we are coming to a close of 2021 I am applying for my daughter's graduation. These were the things that I had not slowed down for. Yet I have no regret as I had shown her through my example to live her life to the fullest, to chase her dreams and to go after anything in life. That is a gift and experience I have shown by example, I didn't dare to be a hypocrite.
But like everyone else I have had my shares of stories for the past two years. These include 1 way tickets, heartbreaks, medical emergencies, lessons, deaths....like I WENT through it. I know we all have but I will be the first to say it was bad, but I am strong and resilient. These past years have taught us all that I bet, a strength inside of us that we didn't even know existed. What matters and what shouldn't...
My biggest accomplishment was that I started gratitude journaling, Meditating, connecting spiritually, studying subjects, taking a variety of courses...and practicing self care. Also saying a whole hell of alot of NO to others and a whole lot of YES to ME. After years as a people pleaser I had finally cut off a majority of people that I couldn't even stand anyways. People who deserved to have zero access to my life and to my loved ones.
I also started saying yes to things that I had passion and sparked interest in me a while ago. I started mixing tracks, investing in bitcoin, writing a novel, selling art....if I had ever dreamt about doing it. I had picked up the item or thing and did it. I stopped putting these things away saying "Someday"....well in these times I think we can be reminded "Someday can sometimes never come". So I started doing these things today. I don't want to be old with regret, or to the end of my life not doing something.
I started to go down a lot of my healing journey, sometimes we think we did the work but we didn't at all. Then triggers or issues come up and we can act out in really unhealthy behaviors which leave us stuck in bad relationships, patterns, cycles and they keep us there. Unless we address them, heal, fix the issues and then move on. You can't truly move forward until you do. Moving forward in a way that I won't sabotage my life in the future.
So when I tell you that 2020 and the last two years have been great for me. It's probably not in the way you had thought. I went into it attending some of the biggest sporting events in the world, traveling, and red carpets. to losing most of my "friends and family", no longer being an active pro athlete, and running a smaller but very successful business that are my passions.
I have healed my trauma related to family and different issues that I have been through. I am actively a part of my kids day-to-day lives, I wake up in an amazing apartment that I dreamt of living in, I work jobs that I have been passionate about for awhile. So even though I've been through it the past two years....I'm grateful for the outcome, I'm grateful for the experience and I'm grateful for life.
Thank you for taking the time to read my lessons, tips and experiences over the past two years because I am also very grateful for you, and I hope my healing journey helped you in some form too.