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The Sacrifice of Being a Content Creator

The hardest thing for any self-employed content creator to do is ask for money. The second hardest thing to do is not attach your self-worth to your financial success.

By Yarn Goddess CosplayPublished 5 years ago 3 min read
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The hardest thing for any self-employed content creator to do is ask for money. The second hardest thing to do is not attach your self-worth to your financial success.

The very foundation of any successful business depends on how much revenue it can generate, and a lot of content creators—myself included—have a hard time asking for a “fair” amount for our time and labor. It’s crazy to think that even though we have bills to pay, groceries to buy, and debt to pay off, too many of us struggle with asking people for money for our work.

A couple weekends ago, I went to BlerdCon in DC. Unfortunately, I missed their deadline to apply for their artist alley table, but my panel had gotten approved, and I wanted to check out the convention. I kept thinking to myself, “Could I afford to travel to a convention and basically spend my weekend networking instead of actively selling in their artist alley?” Between the help of friends and some aggressive carpooling, I was able to keep costs super low, and make it to and from the con, but still, I wanted to find a way to make some money.

The week of, I decided to set up a CashApp account (kind of like Paypal, but less aggressive with fees), and offer people the chance to donate any amount—anything from their pocket change to their life savings—to my business. Anyone who donated $5 or more would get a “Thank you” print of one of my cosplays. I cannot stress enough how much anxiety I had over this idea. I had essentially put myself in the position of actively asking people for money to put towards my company, and I was doing all of this online and FACE TO FACE.

Backtrack real quick to June—the worst time of the year for me both financially and mentally.

I don’t know what it is about the month of June, but last year I hit a financial dry spell where I literally made $0 no matter what I tried. This year was no different, but it was paired with my depression, which caused me to doubt my own worth, which eventually led to me isolating myself. I couldn’t create, I couldn’t get out of bed, I could barely post without feeling like I was wasting my time, or worse—wasting other people’s time—on my content. I kept thinking, “What’s the point of crocheting if my bank is still going to be at $0 when I’m done?” I had friends checking in on me because they’ve never heard me say before that I couldn’t crochet. I was spiraling.

Mid-spiraling I had posted some new cosplay pictures I had worked on a month ago, and I was really pleased with how they came out, and that little bit of personal joy helped me climb out of my spiral. I DO remember finally calling a therapist, getting prices, and telling myself that I refuse to spiral anymore when there was a way to get help. I told myself that I need to break the habit of not asking for money for my business, and to create my own financial stability enough so I could afford therapy. I didn’t just need therapy I WANTED therapy.

Fast forward to July—week of BlerdCon. The best time to practice is now, right?

Friday afternoon of BlerdCon is had dressed up as Wooloo—I figured something cute and new would help hide any anxiety I expressed. I already had my social media pages set up and BlerdCon had retweeted my post about my plan to network and ask for donations all weekend. I was ready.

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About the Creator

Yarn Goddess Cosplay

2018 is the year I decided to throw my voice in the mix and talk about cosplay community issues such as race, cosplay politics and overall share my experience and observations as a African-Caribbean Cosplayer.

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  • DeAnna Troupe11 months ago

    This really hit home. I have a hard time sometimes asking for a reasonable amount of money for my work, too. I'm getting better at it.

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