The Family Or The Friends From Work?

Can you only have formal relationships at work or do some colleagues automatically turn into friends you see after work? Moreover, is it possible for a coworker to become your boyfriend or husband?

We spend about a third of our lives at work, during which time our colleagues are always around us. Whether we like it or not, we get in touch with them every day. No wonder they become a second family and we are tempted to treat them as such. How far can we go in such a relationship without compromising the efficiency and quality of our work at work? Here are some possible scenarios.

1 You don't make friends at work at all

Benefits

You can separate public and private life. This is especially beneficial when you have a very demanding job, which takes place in a stressful environment. This is especially the case for services where there is no fixed salary, but you earn depending on how much you produce. In this way, a competitive environment is encouraged, in which your colleagues are your potential competitors. Meeting them outside of working hours would only prolong the stress of the competition.

Disadvantages

There is a risk of creating a rupture (harmful, obviously!) Between the two aspects of life. It's as if you behaved in a certain way at home, and at work, you were a completely different person. This pendulum involves a high energy consumption and a continuous state of tension, in order to meet the requirements imposed by the working environment.

If every morning you wake up depressed and stressed by the prospect of a new day at work if you don't have any friends among your colleagues and you can't wait for the time to go home, one thing is for sure: look for something else. It is possible that everything is fine with regard to your colleagues, the only reason being that you look at them through the prism of the service you hate.

There is also the situation in which you like work, but you do not have any friends among colleagues. There are two explanations for this: either you are unlucky (you have some hard-to-bear colleagues), or you are of the principle that you should not make friends at work.

In both cases, it is important to remember that man is a social being, and that isolation can have negative effects. If you think you have nothing in common with your colleagues, think that at least the job will connect you. Try to listen to them more, because you may discover many things in common between you.

You will have a tense atmosphere at work. You may be seen as an intruder and no one wants to help you when needed. Therefore, your results will suffer as well.

2 You make friends at work

Benefits

You will have a pleasant atmosphere, as in any other place where you are surrounded by friends. You will gain both help in matters of work and security from an emotional point of view.

You can make new friends. Many say that you make real friends much earlier, in high school or college. However, due to the fact that you spend more time at work than at school, there is a chance that you will also bond emotionally with your colleagues.

You work as a family. Relationships at work restore in a way the structure and hierarchy of a family, in which the bosses represent the parents, and the rest of the colleagues - the siblings.

Therefore, it is very important to get along well with everyone, in order to receive support from everyone. An environment conducive to work can help you to develop not only professionally, but also morally and to learn new behaviors that will be necessary for your life.

Knowing that you have friends by your side who support you when needed helps you work better. If you work with people in whose presence you feel good, you feel connected to the company you work for.

You want to do more for her, which motivates you to fulfill your duties as best you can. This is a psychological mechanism that works every time, but which, unfortunately, is too little exploited by the management of our companies - in some places, the opposite policy is applied. People who get along better should not be allowed to work together, not those who are in conflict (they will try to undermine each other).

Disadvantages

New friends at work want to replace your old group of friends. This is the following case: you want to get along well with your colleagues, but only at work. However, they are organizing more and more outings in the city, taking up your free time.

It is absolutely normal to want to have as varied meetings as possible, with friends who work in different fields, with whom you rarely see each other and you want to share the latest news. This does not mean that you value your friends less at work, but that you need diversity - if you always go out with the same people, at some point you get bored and monotonous.

You may have difficulty evaluating your friend's work. When you are attached to someone, it is much harder to objectively appreciate their results. Thus, by ignoring certain mistakes, you can fall into the trap of subjectivity. Not to mention the more serious cases, when it comes to covering up your friend's mistakes or doing the work for him. At an objective analysis, the consequences will affect you as well.

The quarrel with a friend at work will not only affect you emotionally but also professionally because you will not work as well as before.

3 You start a relationship

Benefits

You are always with your loved one - at first glance, a privilege that few have.

There will be no conflicts related to the job, because, working in the same field, he will understand your work.

Think about how useful it would be to be able to talk about the same things and not worry about spending too little time with each other.

Moreover, you know that at work you will always have a person you can count on.

Disadvantages

Unfortunately, such a relationship can be threatened by monotony and saturation. Basically, working together every day, you do not have the opportunity to miss the other and thus realize how much it means to you.

If you start a relationship with a co-worker, and things don't work out and the relationship falls apart, you'll still need to see him every day, which isn't easy.

Usually, such a relationship is "under the magnifying glass", subject to gossip and ironic comments from colleagues.

What to Do When You Have "Too Many Friends"

Are your new friends on the job going to take the place of your old group of friends?

Specifically, you wake up bombarded every day or on weekends by guests in the city from colleagues and you can't refuse them, because in this way you will offend them. The best excuse is the invitation received "from old friends". It is very important to specify that they have made the invitation and that you are not going out in the city, but that you are going to their home; if you went to town, your co-workers wouldn't understand why they couldn't come too.

If you break up with a co-worker who was also your romantic partner, it is better to do it as diplomatically as possible.

The most civilized thing is to have a conversation, in which you explain the reasons why you want to break up. And don't forget to mention how much you want to be friends. In the immediate aftermath of the breakup, don't completely break up with him, but keep talking.

By doing so, you gradually accustom your colleagues to the new situation, you do not give them a chance to gossip and you will spare your nerves.