Journal entry #3

July 1st 2021

Now here is a little life update that I have not done in a while.

I moved out of my parents house and into a new city. It has been good overall but some ups and downs have come along the way. Now this is not something that is new to me but it is hard for me to adapt to because I cling on to the highs of my life so tightly.

This is something that I have always done as a kid. I am not sure if this is the right way to go about life but it is what I have always done. I am in a good mood more than 90% of my day/life. Now I see this as a good thing but some might say I don't cope with my feelings. I cope with my feelings just in a different way than others do...

Now I talk about things but not everything. Other times I go to work out or paint to get out of my head. I am sure people can relate and some people cannot. Sports have been my life for so long, I do not know any other way.

Here's the thing, some people feel the need to talk about every single interact that comes across their face. It is just not my cup of tea. I need space from all that and sometimes you just acknowledge what has happened at move on.

July 7th 2021

Now I get it, everyone compares relationships... whether its friendships or intimate relationships, almost everyone compares from one to another. But I am thinking in the back of my head, we got to stop doing that. It is not healthy and every relationship is different. No relationship is comparable to another.

Maybe someone is worried about their own relationship so they are trying to find peace in their own relationship. Whether there are issues in the relationship or not... why do we compare?

Someone just recently, came off to be me a little rude because they were worried and comparing their own relationship. Now I try to give as much empathy as possible but at what point do you step back and say wait... I am being taken advantage of and the things that are being said are not okay.

I have been hurt and burned by so many people and so called, "friends" over the years of high school to college that I am over the immaturity at this point. Some people take it too far and do not realize that stuff that comes out of their mouth, let alone that actions that come along with it.

I am 24 going on 25... I do not have time for the childish actions and words that have been coming across my face.

August 16th

It has been a while since I wrote anything on here, I am not sure why it has taken me so long. I need to do this more often but the corporate/societical world is killing me right now.

I know challenges and hard times make us stronger but man... I have been avoiding all my problems lately. I got laid off about a month ago and being able to find a job with what I want to do or just a job that is good pay compared to my old job is really hard. I am trying to leave the industry I was last in but HOLY CRAP... it is so hard to find a job right now.

There are some jobs that are not 9-5 and don't have an benefits but then I have to get two of them which is fine, I have done it before but it is not idealistic.

I keep going back and forth between my apartment and my parents because, my roommate situation is also not the best. I am grateful I got to move out but I want to live alone already.

My mental health and confidence was really good before I moved. This person is going through a lot, trying to tear me down and make me feel like crap.

August 29th

Some stuff that has been going on lately...

I am trying to find a new apartment since my living situation is not going too well.

I am loving where I live right now and am making so many friends...

It is so great I feel like this is where I am meant to be

I keep getting signs that I should just go for my hobby and I think that is what I am going to do.

I went to my first music festival in so long and I forgot how much I missed it.

Everyone is in a good mood and everyone is just vibing.

I love it so much, its like you are on top of the world and you're listening to good music.