It Never Rains In Tokyo, Apparently.

Oh what joy! Last night a delivery man came to our humble abode with a brand new Mac mini M2 and new screen. This morning is my first serious use of it. It has immediately transformed my writer's life.

The old Apple Mac I was using was so bloody slow, at best, and crashed so many times a day, it really did push me to my outer limits. It was a lottery if it would come back on later or not. I lost so much time waiting for the recalcitrant thing to cooperate with me. Often I tried to reboot it. Sometimes that worked, and sometimes not.

Now I click and get an immediate response, superfast, instantaneous almost. My wife didn't get around to transferring all of my stuff across from the old Mac to this new baby, so I am having to spend time resetting new passwords. Apart from that I am good to go.

Now, I can write, instead of getting stressed out to the max and cursing the blessed computer with all manner of obscene expletives, even to the point of threatening the thing with a blood curdling death.

It's funny how we get frustrated with inanimate objects and get all personal about it. Lord knows what the neighbours think is going on in here. I am amazed nobody has called the police after one of my shouty meltdowns. For sure, they thought I was about to murder my lovely wife.

So, blood pressure now normalised, heart attack or stroke averted, assassination dispensed with as a possible solution to the problem. A new Mac was all it took. It's like getting rid of that old banger of a car that has been driving you nuts for years. All of a sudden, I got a brand new combine harvester, I got a brand new day.

Looking back, I am truly amazed at how much writing I did manage to get done over this past month. Up to about eighty five articles and stories so far. Imagine how much more I could have done with this baby. It just goes to show, you are only as good as your equipment will allow you to be.

Another highly frustrating thing that old computer did was act like an underpaid temp with an attitude problem. I would ask her for Skype and she would bring me Twitter. Tried again, she brought me Vocal Media.....if I had had a housebrick handy I would have surely smashed it right into her arsey screen, teach the bleedin temp a lesson. Still, she now sits sulking on a small table near the window, disconnected. Bitch.

Oh, and speaking of bitches, another one is Siri. I use Siri quite a lot for things like the local weather conditions, in case I want to go for a walk and it might rain on my parade. Siri has been so wrong, so many times, she needs shooting.

One day, when a typhoon was ripping its way through Tokyo, I asked Siri if the typhoon was heading our way. Siri told me that there wasn't any typhoon in Tokyo at the moment. The tv news feed was at that precise moment showing pictures of the devastation going on, just an hour or so north west of where we live!

Another time I asked Siri about the rain that was pouring down outside my window. I wanted to know when it was likely to stop. Siri told me that there wasn't any rain and the outlook for the rest of the day was bright, dry and sunny. The rain not only did not stop, it increased to the point of flooding the streets all around us!

Computers, you can't live with them, you can't bury the buggers under the patio. There's a law against that sort of thing, huh?