Can life improve if we drop expectations?

You keep building expectations but to only to get disappointed time and time agai. So, is it really worth it? What do you even gain? Nothing.

Who needs expectations? And why?

Ever wondered who decided that it is important to expect something or anything from anyone? Of course, for children or teenagers, it's only natural for them to keep expecting things from their parents or elder siblings. However, as we grow older and become adults, should we really keep expecting anything anymore?

So why do youngsters keep expecting whilst adults shouldn't? It's simply related to age - you're older so you're expected to be mature and self-sufficient. Nobody really expects anything from youngsters because subconsciously we believe that they are unable to fulfill what we want or need. This normal because the younger you are, the less experience and knowledge you have in life compared to someone who is much much older. Although this is not true for every single human it's what we, again, expect in society.

You keep building expectations but guess what? You will be the only one to suffer once nothing meets your expectations, simply because life is not a fairytale. We don't always get what we want, well at least not by expecting things from others only.

How do we stop building expectations?

It's nice to have someone you trust and rely on so much that you can expect things from them but, you will need to build a plan just in case they suddenly change. Yes, people do change drastically over time, it is what human beings are like so instead of being shocked and overwhelmed by it, you have to always keep it in mind. Avoid being disappointed in someone or people simply by always putting two possibilities, what you always expect and what you least expect. For example, you expect your sibling to love you and always wish the best for you however you realise one day that he/she cruelly betrays you in the most unexpected way. Now, if you are someone who would not have expected this to come from the closest people to you, it will make you appear ignorant or pathetic. It hurts, but life is becoming so brutal that it no longer matters if you share blood or not, you will get betrayed and your expectations will only keep getting shattered time and time again. None of us want this negativity in our lives but because we cannot stop people from being evil and heartless, we have to take measures beforehand. I would suggest either not having any expectation at all or as mentioned earlier, have the two possibilities - the good and the bad.

Advise for the future

The type of expectations you will have to withhold or completely get rid of are the ones where you expect a birthday present, a specific reaction/behaviour and the most common is 'if I am kind to them, they will surely be kind to me in return' which is the most naive and petty out of all expectations. As harsh as it may sound, you are an adult and in this world, there is no such thing as mutual kindness because not everyone thinks the way you do or hold the same morals/values as yourself. If you put yourself in other people's shoes and always remember that everyone is not the way you are because we are all humans, different in many many ways. You will have a better and professional future if you set aside the expectations that are drawing you back from becoming who you are achieving great things in life. People will not look back at you or even remember you, they will continue breaking expectations, betraying and being cruel. You don't have to be like them, you show them life is not all about negativity and evil will not last as long as there is at least just...one kind soul in this world.