The Very Hungry House (or Why You've Never Met My Friend Xavier)

"The cabin in the woods had been abandoned for years, but one night, a candle burned in the window."

[“Dad, is this gonna be another one of your ghost stories?”

“Yeah, but this one's true so toast your marshmallows now cos you’ll be too scared after and you’ll want to go inside!”

“Pfft, better be scarier than the last one.”]

This happened when I was still at school, all the kids knew about the cabin, but no one I’d heard of, not even the real toughies, had ever been there. The story that spread at the drinker troughs and in the dunnies was the cabin had once been the site of a strange incident involving a young family. Apparently, a young banker and his beautiful housewife had moved in with their two pre-school age kids, a girl and a boy. The perfect family! This was like, ten or twenty years before I was at school, so was ancient history by the time I'd heard it.

Not long after moving in the banker started complaining the house was falling apart as it constantly creaked and groaned keeping the family awake all night. He got a builder to go out there and do an inspection, who came and sounded out the whole house. Tapping and prodding the walls and floors, tested all the stumps, checked for termites, that sort of thing. Not a creak or groan to be found, no faults or other damage to be seen. The builder shrugged, told the banker the house was as solid as when it had been first built, and left a rather confused banker $50 short and none the wiser for the unexplained noises.

Not more than a week later the banker failed to turn up to work, the house phone rang out, and three days later the manager at the bank rang the police as it was certainly out of character for the normally conscientious worker. The police rolled out and were met by a neat wooden cabin nestled deep in the forest, the sort you see all the time that people have as weekenders and the such. The family's brand new Zephyr was still parked in the driveway, so they thought the family must still be there.

[“Whats a Zephyr?”

“Its an old car, popular in the 60’s. Don’t interrupt this is an important bit.”]

They knocked on the front door, thinking that maybe the banker had fallen sick or been hurt, and just not called it into work. There was no response. They knocked again. The same deathly stillness. The only life to be heard was the shrill cries of hundreds of cicadas that made the forest home and come out on the hottest days of summer, which is of course the time of year this happened.

The cops went around peering into the windows trying to see any signs of movement, or bodies or anything really. The cabin seemed deserted, and the only odd thing they reported in their initial call back to base was a single extinguished candle in the front room, surrounded by what looked like ash or soot. After making sure there was no sign of habitation, they bashed down the front door and looked around. It was a small single-story building and it didn’t take them long to check that the building was deserted. It looked like the family had just disappeared with no real explanation. The only thing that was out of place was the front sitting room. A single thick black candle sat on a table in the middle of the room. No longer burning, it was surrounded by a large pool of wax suggesting it had been lit for a while before going out. On the table and covering the floor and furniture in the room was a thick layer of soot, and like the candle black as deepest night. The local officers were at a loss and called in the Detectives. This was way before all the fancy forensic work they do now so there was no real way to test the scene for anything. After a thorough check of the surrounding woods with dogs and trackers, the Detectives called it a case of spontaneous combustion and closed the case. The cabin was nailed shut and given the mystery surrounding the disappearances, no one ever bought it, and so has been left abandoned ever since. Whatever had happened to that family they were never seen again, most people didn’t believe in the spontaneous combustion theory and there was someone or something lurking in the woods that had taken that poor family.

[“Spontaneous combustion does exist, we learned in science. It's when a body burns but uses up all the oxygen in a room so the fire goes out.”

“Yep, ok, just so you know we didn’t have science back then ok?”]

So when the schoolyard grapevine started circulating the story of the lit candle it became a centre of argument amongst all the kids.

I was about 12 then and in the last year of primary school, so me and my friends thought we were pretty cool and knew without a doubt how the world worked.

“That story is a load of bull dust.” That’s Xavier, my best friend. “My Dad reckons the banker stole money from the bank and ran away with his family to an island in the Caribbean he bought with all the cash he took.” Sounded like it could be right and Xav was the cool guy so I didn't argue with him.

“Yeah its just a story to stop kids going into the woods, it’s not even very scary,” I said trying to be as cool as Xav.

[“Sure isn’t scary. When are you getting to the scary bit?”

“Soon, this is just setting the scene. Really you kids are too impatient these days, no appreciation of character development. I blame those hand screen things.”

“Pfft!”]

“I bet there’s not even a candle there,” Xav stated, "it’s just another dumb story made up by those 5th graders.”

At this point there probably didn’t need to be much more said, we’d proved that we were above such childish stories, time to move on. But there always has to be one. Someone who takes things too far.

“You’ll prove them wrong, won’t you Xavy?” said a girl's voice.

This is a good time to tell you about the make up of our little gang. There was me, obviously, and Xav. Xav was sort of the leader, we didn’t really have one, but he kinda came up with a lot of the ideas. We used to go with them so I suppose that makes him a leader even though he wasn’t like really bossy or anything. Then there was Gary, he was tall and sporty, but pretty thick so he balanced out my brains and lack of physical ability nicely.

Then there was Cindy, and her friend Kate. They were new recruits, Cindy was the one who’d just spoken and was Xav’s girlfriend. Kate was Cindy’s friend and hung out with us because Cindy thought it was boring to hang out with just guys. Whatever that meant.

To be honest I wasn’t real keen on girls joining the gang, but Xav seemed to really like her. They’d even held hands a few times in front of everyone, and snogged being the shelter shed once, which meant it was pretty serious. Besides he was my best friend so I went with it.

[“Dad there’s nothing wrong with girls hanging out with boys. We do it all the time!”

“Yeah, yeah, this was back in the day when girls were weird alright?”]

Xav looked at her, a slightly puzzled look on his face.

“Well, you should go out there and prove the story one way or the other. Then you’ll be the coolest kid at school!” You could see Xav was a bit hurt at that, I think he already thought he was the coolest kid at school.

She grabbed his arm and gushed enthusiastically “You’re really brave, what are you going to do?”

Of course, this put Xav in a bit of a bind: did he go with Cindy and somehow prove that the story was just made up; or did he dismiss her idea and risk the chance of displeasing his girlfriend.

There was really only one way he could play this.

He scratched his head, thinking quickly. “Well I suppose I can go up there after school and check it out. Won’t take long, it's only an hour ride on the bike. I could be up there and back by sunset!” I’d known him long enough to sense the false confidence, but Cindy bought it straight.

“Brilliant!” she exclaimed, as Kate rolled her eyes behind her back. Kate was with me on the whole joining the gang bit and made every opportunity to look bored or act bemused at our antics.

That was when Gary chimed in. Like I said he was a bit slow, but sometimes a couple of neurons fired together coming up with something insightful.

[“Hey is that Gary your friend from the fishing store?”

“Um, yeah that’s the one, we’ve been friends for ages.”

“What about Xavier though, we don’t know him do we?”

“I’m getting to that! Look the character development is pretty much done so just listen!”]

“So Xavier,” Gaz said thoughtfully “How are you going to prove it’s not true?”

Xav sat silent for a sec, a second too long, because then Kate piped up. “Why doesn’t Cindy go with him, it was her idea, she can back him up.” It was a bit spiteful really but sounded like a good idea. Gary and I nodded in agreeance.

“Oh, OK,” Cindy said a bit uncertain, “I can tell my parents I’ll be home late.” Then her face brightened. “Hey, why don’t we all go, the whole gang!” Great, that was the last thing I wanted to do, go up to the haunted cabin. The place scared the crap out of me.

“Uh, sorry Cindy, I’ve got footy training after school I’m out…” Gary actually had the grace to look a bit disappointed. He probably was actually.

“Na, sorry too Cinds, I’ve got Brownies on tonight I can’t miss that.” I gotta say Kate looked pretty smug, I was kinda impressed with how she’d manipulated this so far.

Then without warning, I was the centre of everyone’s gaze. Damn.

“Well…”, actually I had nothing. I didn’t play sport or did anything else really. My parents always worked late and they all knew it. Xav was looking at me with that look that I know meant there’d be serious consequences if I didn’t come with them. “Yeah sure, I’ve got nothing on.” I said as cool as I could. So that’s how I got to be involved in what happened next.

After school we agreed to meet at the servo on the edge of town and ride our bikes out to the cabin. Everyone thought we knew where the cabin was, but none of us had ever actually been there. We thought it would take about 30 minutes to ride out there, and 30 back. We’d be back way before sundown which was pretty late given it was the middle of summer.

[“Boy, you don’t even let me go down the street on my own. I hope you got in trouble!”

"You'll be in more trouble if you don't let me finish this story."]

I showed up as planned and was the first one there. Great, the others had chickened out. Actually, I was quite relieved I didn’t have to go through with it, and gave myself five minutes before I left, just to say I’d waited but no one had come. I was about to go when Cindy rode up on her sky blue Malvern Star. “Oh, hi Cindy,” I said disappointed. “Where’s Xav?”

[“I know what a Malvern Star is, it’s a bike”

“Yes, great, now please!”]

“Xavier? He isn’t here? What a scaredy-cat, really, it doesn’t surprise me” she said, sitting down on the curb under the shade of a big old elm tree. “I guess we should wait for him.” Well, this was awkward, I hardly ever spoke to Cindy when the others were around.

“Sure.” So we sat under the tree waiting for Xav, it felt like hours but was probably like 30 minutes.

She let out a big sigh, “I think we’d better go home, I don’t think he’ll turn up.”

“Oh, well I suppose that’s a good idea.” I agreed. “We can always go another day.” She nodded wisely at my idea.

Then we hear the crackle of bike tires rolling over gravel as Xav came rushing down the street on his BMX, his face red with exertion.

“Gees guys. Sorry I took so long, my Dad told me to mow the lawn! During the week, I couldn’t believe it.”

[“Ha, just like you dad!”]

Now our leader was here we were committed, so we took the bitumen road out of town with the late afternoon sun at our backs. The turn off to the cabin wasn’t far out of town which we found no worries, then headed up the old forest track. Having never been there we didn’t really know how long it was going to take, but it really seemed to be taking forever.

“Xav, how long do you think this is going to take?” Cindy was starting to look a bit exhausted, even though the sun was getting low it was still pretty warm from the day, and there was no wind which made it stifling under the trees.

“Dunno Cin, don’t reckon it’ll be too long,” was his vague answer. Not only was it hot but the cicadas were out in force as well, so there was this constant background of shrill buzzing as we peddled up the undulating forest track.

It was a good hour after leaving town that we finally came to the cabin. Just like in the stories, it was a wood cabin, nestled tightly in amongst a crowded pine forest. Why would anyone live here, rather than in a real house in the town?

[“Maybe they weren’t very rich?”

“No they were rich, he was a banker remember? Anyway it's part of the mystery, why they were living out there.”

“Oh, ok.”]

We’d taken way longer than we thought to get out here, the sun was already way below the trees and the forest was becoming gloomy. The cicadas were still at it though, buzzing and ticking away like crazy.

The driveway came in at the side of the cabin. A narrow brick path, half-hidden by dead grass, twisted away to what we thought was the front yard. We picked our way nervously around the side of the cabin. There was a bizarre feeling in the air, it was dead calm, and the cicada's incessant cacophony drilled into my head. As we got to the front corner the path veered off under the house, totally weird it was like someone had built an extension and just put it over the footpath. Looking closer at the building that’s exactly what it looked like, the beams and sawn planks on this side definitely looked newer and different thickness than the back where we’d come in from. We kept creeping around to the front porch. Cindy reached out to Xavier who was in front.

“Wow, this is weird isn’t it.” She said, her voice kinda hollow and subdued, fighting against the noise of the insects.

“Sure is, we’ll have a quick look around, see the place is empty, then hit the frog and toad real quick,” he said.

[“Oh, is this the scary bit!?”

“Really! No more interruptions ok, this is serious, this really happened ok?”

“Sure, locking up lips, throwing away key!”]

I thought we should have hit the road right then, but was too scared to say anything. The odd twisty path picked up again around the corner and went straight to a couple of short steps that led onto the weathered porch and front door. Next to the front door was a wide window that was mostly boarded up except for a few rotten boards that had fallen down. The door wasn’t boarded at all, and in fact stood slightly ajar, a black strip of dark emptiness framing one side. It was getting really dark now, twilight hitting fast in the woods, and Xav strode up those stairs with Cindy in arm. I was dragging my feet big time and stood at the bottom of the steps unwilling to commit. He went up to the window and peered through the gap left by the fallen boards.

He recoiled like stung, a sharp gasp accompanied by wide eyes. “What the!?” he exclaimed. “Holy cow, look at that!” I lurched up the stairs as if pulled by a rope. Now Cindy was at the window, her body frozen solid like she’d been turned to stone. I edged in next to her as Xav whispered, “Wow, I can’t believe it’s true.”

I couldn’t believe it either. The window looked into a front sitting room, and there, sitting on a long table in the middle of the room was a candle, black as deepest night, burning steadily and casting a sickly yellow glow across the deserted room.

It was hard, but I tore my eyes away from the bizarre scene. “Xav, lets go, we’ve seen it now. This is strange, someone must have lit it, we should go.”

There was a peculiar look in his eyes though, and he glanced quickly at Cindy, who’d also pulled herself away from the window and was looking pensive and chewing her bottom lip.

“No, no. Let’s take the candle. Imagine what the kids will say at school if we bring it back. We’ll be heroes and the coolest."

I wanted to stop him, believe me, but he was possessed with the idea of getting the candle, and in front of Cindy he was not going to back down. “Come on, don't be lame, it will take two seconds, look the door is open!” His confidence dragged me along as he pushed open the front door and entered the house. It was then that I noticed the silence. The cicadas had stopped their ghastly singing.

As soon as we entered the house the silence was replaced by another sound. The whole house started creaking and moaning, like it was in a gale force wind. The floorboards, the walls, the ceiling all emitted a constant groaning and squeaking. Despite the noise everything was still, there was no wind and the house seemed solid. The noise continued as we made our way to the sitting room door in the failing light filtering in from the front door. It was easy to know where to go, a faintly flickering glow showed under the door and Xav slowly pushed it open. I was beside myself with fear, looking around and expecting someone, or something, to jump out of the shadows at any moment to murder us in horrible ways.

Xav entered the room. Cindy was a step behind him, with me following. I stopped again at the threshold as Xav snuck forward toward the table, the tall thick candle guttering slightly with the change in air currents. I was transfixed, as he reached forward. It was then that I noticed the black stain blanketing the floor and old furniture. It looked like soot, and I could see Xav’s footprints baring the wooden floorboards underneath.

[“Don’t touch it Xav!”

“SHHH!”]

“Xav!...” I tried to yell but it all happened too quick. He was reaching forward to grab the candle when suddenly the flame flared, and a thick oily ribbon of smoke burst out from the flame. The plume twisted and jerked as it rose, like a living thing, and quick as a snake struck at Xav’s outstretched hand. Trying to snatch it out of the way his reactions were too slow, the tendril of smoke wrapped itself up his arm, growing thicker and pulsating until it snapped around his neck.

Xav opened his mouth as if to scream and then, in an instant, vanished into a cloud of ash. One second Xav stood, arm outstretched, body strained, and then a human size cloud of ash and soot was floating in the middle of the room. The whole house shook then, the groaning and creaking reached a crescendo.

At that point a few things happened all at once. Cindy started screaming, a cry of horror and fear, her arms rigid by her side, hands and fingers stretched out. Then I saw, through the hazy soot slowly falling to the floor, the twisted column of smoke. Like a snake tracking its prey it turned slowly towards us, continuing to pulsate in time with the grumbling clamours emitting from the cabin.

“Cindy!” I managed to get it out this time, “RUN!” I must admit at this point of not being very aware of what was happening. I grasped one of her taunt hands and turned, pulling her at the same time. She was stiff at first, but then I put all my strength into my legs and got her moving as I ran wildly to the front door. My hand clasping firmly her wrist I flew out the door onto the porch. Cindy was keeping up thankfully because I wasn’t going to stop. I was grateful she didn’t stumble as I jumped over the lintel, lept across the porch, and bounded one-two down the steps, skidding to a stop on the dry grass and hard dirt at the front of the house. “C’MON Cindy, we have to get to the bikes!”

It was then when I was clear of the cabin, and the mad sounds were no longer in my ears, only the heavy pounding of my heart, did I turn to see if the evil black smoke was following us.

Wind a sick feeling I realised that a cloud of soot followed me out the door, gently blowing away in the soft summer night air. A handspan from where I held her wrist with fearful strength Cindy’s arm ended in a scorched and blackened stump.

[“OK Dad, that was a bit scary, except that fake hand you pulled out there was a bit dumb, and I worked out the end earlier at the bit when you were pulling Cindy out of the room.”

“Well, still, you know it really happened, that's why you've never met Xavier!”

“Sure, now take the marshmallows, I’ve got a really scary one to tell.”]