The Last Train to Nowhere

The somber sounds of music can be heard as the darkness of my vision begins to clear around me. Shapes can be seen as small balls of light bounce from both sides of the room. The music is familiar, it's eerie tune echoing in the canals of my ears.

Somewhere beyond the sea

Somewhere waiting for me

My lover stands on golden sands

And watches the ships that go sailin'

The music continues to play the same lines over and over, the needle of the gramophone spinning as if it was working normally. My vision starts to clear as the shapes from before begin to reveal themselves to me. I'm on the floor of some sort of train car. Light can be seen flashing past the foggy windows on both sides of me. We are moving fast. Faster then any train I had ever been on before. I begin to stand up, the wobbliness of my own body taking over as I straighten my spine. My muscles and joints seem to ache and scream at me as they stretch for what feels like the first time in years. I am finally able to stretch my arms towards the roof of the train car, the cracking of bones and joints filling the drumming of the train around me. A sense of uneasiness began to take ahold of me.

The passing light of the windows was suddenly extinguished. I stood there for a moment in the darkness, the slow drum of the train moving along the tracks the only thing filling the air around me. But as the seconds passed and my eyes acclimated to the seemingly endless darkness around me, I begin to hear something. Something that wasn't there when I opened my eyes. The sound of breathing. It's barely there, hidden in the darkness around me. Suddenly the sound of electricity coursing its way through aged metal filled the cabin around me. The lightbulbs above me began to flicker, filling the cabin with dim light. I was definitely in a train car of sorts. A few rows of cracked leather seats could be seen on both sides of me.

It was in every sense of the word a normal looking train car. A small bar could be seen a few feet in front of me on the right surrounded by a few wooden barstools. A gray haired man could be seen sitting on one of the stools, his shallow breathing filling the air around me. His beard touched the counter in front of him, a neat mess of gray and black hairs. He turned towards me.

"Well, well. You're a bit young to be here don't you think?" His piercing blue eyes seemed to look right through me. He looked me up and down, turning his frail body towards me.

He was wearing a black two piece suit that looked almost untouched compared to the run down train car around me. He pulled out a golden pocket watch and glanced at the time, his blue eyes analyzing it for a moment before turning back to me.

I began to walk towards him, looking at each row of seats as I passed them in the aisle. They were all empty. "Where am I? How did I get on this train?" My voice cracked as pain shot through my throat muscles. It was as if I hadn't spoken in days.

The old man smiled, leaning his back on the bar counter behind him. "You are where we all end up. Some might call it heaven, some might call it hell. But the truth is this is it. The last hurrah in the story that is our lives." I could feel the muscles in my face beginning to twitch as the words hit my brain. He looked at me and smiled. "Or in simplest terms, you are in the world beyond the living. This train is the last great hurdle before the great beyond."

"But why?" My voice begins to break as the seconds pass, the mans eyes staring into my own. "This is just a bad dream. I-" I began to close my eyes, staring into the darkness behind my eyelids. "I'm gonna wake myself up now I'm sorry." There is nothing. No family or friends. No wives or ex-girlfriends. Nothing. My own name seems to avoid me as I stand there and think. I open my eyes slowly, the dim light of the bulbs flickering above me as the seconds passed.

"No matter how hard you try young one, it all ends the same. Look down at your shirt, your clothes and shoes. You might not remember, but this is your final outfit. The thing you were wearing in your last moments on this green ball of rock we call Earth." I looked down at my shirt and pants. I was wearing a torn shirt and faded blue jeans. One shoe was missing, leaving my pale skin open to the elements. Blood could be seen in the center of my shirt, the red lines falling down towards my waist.

I could feel the tears forming in the pockets of my eyes. "How did I die? Please just tell me." The old man looks at me for a moment, showing no signs of remorse or any care towards my situation. He turns back around in his chair, leaving me to stare at his crooked back.

"It is not my place to tell you that. Go on through that door to the next train car. No matter what you think you may or may not have deserved in your life, it has already happened and there is not a thing you can do to go back. Believe me young one I know. Make the leap into whatever after life there is. I will remain here as I always have." He laughed to himself for a moment, his voice echoing throughout the train car. And with that final word the windows around me lit up again once more. The pale white light of the moon could be seen as the train accelerated faster and faster forward.

On both sides of the train were sharp canyons of twisted rock and steep edges that seemed to go up as far as the eye could see. I stood there for a moment and stared at the door in front of me, its rusted metal drawing me closer and closer. The old man continued to stare at the book in front of him, taking a few sips out of his glass every few seconds. I walked up to the door and grabbed the knob, turning it ever so slowly. The metal groaned and whined as I slowly pulled it open. Inside was a dark hallway that connected my train car to the one in front of me.

"A word of caution as you find your way amongst the train cars that lie ahead. Do not stay for too long in any one place. Your mind will drift and roam and you will be trapped in whatever place you end up in forever. Nothing more than a ghost trapped in the walls." The old man looks at me one last time over his shoulder. "I wish you good luck in the afterlife." he raises his glass one last time and turns back to the bar. I step into the small hallway, the door closing as I look into the cabin one last time. A few feet in front of me is a door, no different than the one behind me.

Sounds can be heard however. Sounds that hadn't been there in the previous train car. Laughing and giggling and other sounds of people interacting with one another. I reached out to grab the handle, my hand firmly grasping the cold metal knob. In one quick motion, I entered the room. I was immediately blinded by a wide away of neon lights that seemed to stretch from every part of the cabin in front of me. I tried to shield my eyes with my hand, the light coming through the cracks in my fingers ever so slightly. A women's voice was suddenly heard amongst the quiet rumble of the train car.

"Well hello handsome." My eyes turn to the right and notice a naked woman sitting on a small cot. Next to her is a naked man, his flaccid penis lying on the side of his pale thigh. She was as beautiful a women as I had ever seen with a body that looked as if it was sculped by the gods themselves. She stood up and looked at me, her green eyes eyeing me up and down as she bit her lip.

"H-Hi." I fumbled over my words for a moment. She walked over to me, her womanly features bouncing ever so slightly as the moments seemed to pass by. I suddenly noticed how many beds and people there were in this train car. Dozens of people could be seen on tiny little cots, fresh clean linen underneath nearly every couple. One by one they began to wake up around me as the women inched closer and closer. She reached me, grabbing my crotch area suddenly.

"Ah, naughty naughty. Come and join us. Endless pleasure awaits those who live within our world." She slowly releases my crotch, slowly walking back to the sleeping man. The people around me begin to kiss and moan as they rub their hands on each others bodies. Some begin to engage in intercourse, their moans of pleasure filling the air around us. It was suddenly as if the predators had heard the dying call of their prey. The men and women around me began to switch off partners as I walked past, each one begging me to join them in their sweet embrace.

The woman who had walked up to me before was now on her knees next to the cot, begging the sleeping man to wake and pleasure her. As the moments passed and he began to wake up, his penis grew larger and larger. She grabbed it at it's base and put it in her mouth, a loud sucking noise being heard over the moans of pleasure around me. I closed my eyes for a moment. Do not stay for too long in any one place, the old mans words echoed in my head. I begin to make my way to the door on the other side of the train car, dodging naked men and women as I went. I reached the door and quickly grabbed the handle, turning it and going into the small hallway once again.

The sounds of moaning could be heard behind me. I shook my head and rubbed my eyes, walking forward a few feet to the next door. I cautiously moved up to the door in front of me, pressing my ear against the cold metal in an attempt to see what might lay ahead of me. The smell of food touched my nose for a moment. Food so delicious and intricate that it made my mouth water at the thought of what might be on the other side. I once again reached out my hand and grabbed the cold doorknob and slowly opened the door.

The smells rushed into my nostrils and my mouth. I could taste everything. From the seasonings to the specific dishes, everything hit me in a seconds notice. The room was completely different from the one before. There was a large heavy set man sitting in the middle of the room. He had what looked to be a turkey leg in his mouth, ripping pierces of meat off in rapid succession as the seconds flew by. He suddenly noticed me, turning his large and grotesque looking head towards me with a smile. Looking at him, I couldn't tell if he was smiling or if it was nothing more then the dozens of creases on his blubbery face.

"Ah, a newcomer to my grand feast! How are you young lad? Join me. There is so much food and so little time to enjoy it. You need to put some meat on your bones boy!" He turned back to the large table and grabbed a loaf of bread shoving it into his mouth. "Join me before all this food goes bad. This damn hunger won't go away, but be sure it will be solved in good time." A loud grumble is heard coming from the mans stomach, the movements inside him rippling on his fatty skin. The man looked at me for a moment, his eyes picking me apart. There hidden in the grooves of his face, is a undeniable sense of hunger. That kind of hunger that never goes away.

He is more monster then man as I stand there and look at him back, my eyes noticing the rotting food and bile that seem to be all around him. The table however looks nearly untouched. Its line and details are intricate and beautiful, its fine china and silverware as clean as the day they were made. The space between the mans table and the window is so small, I am not even sure if I can make it if I tried to. The mountains of filth behind his chair almost seemed to be pushing him and the table closer and closer to the wall, until there was nothing left but his disgusting appetite and the coffin he found himself in. Bones and rotting carcasses alike, it didn't matter. It would all be his tomb.

"I'm afraid I have to be going. I was told not to linger long in one place" The man began to let out a hearty laugh before quickly turning his gaze back to me.

"If you didn't get entranced by the likes of Aphrodite and her filth, then you have already made it farther then most. She would have given you the world, wrapped in a shell of thin silk and euphoria. But here you are. A man who refuses to accept what has come to pass. Go if you must. There are worst things to fear then me ahead. Go. Get out of my sight before I consume you as well." The man turned his large head back towards the table and began to eat again, ripping into everything in front of him without any rhyme or reason.

He paused for a moment and looked at me. "I won't allow you to leave much longer. My food is running thin, and the hunger never leaves my side." He smiled a crooked smile, his black and rotting teeth to bare to the world. In one quick motion I walked past his table, staying as close to the window as I could. Before I knew it, I was at the other side of the train car standing in front of the door.

I turned my head back to the man for a moment. "Thank you." The words made the man tilt his head.

"Don't thank me yet lad. Somethings are worse then an insatiable hunger. You will know that soon enough. Now get your skinny ass out of my dining room!" His words boomed through my eardrums, causing me to turn and grab the knob. In one quick motion I was safe. The only thing to keep me company was the steady drum of the train moving along its tracks. I began to walk towards the next door, hesitating for a moment as I turned the cold metal. No sounds could be heard through the dirty glass.

I opened the door. The sudden clash of metal hitting metal was heard as two men in front of me battled to the death. Where you would expect to see silver, shiny armor that was polished and intricate was replaced with a look of decay. They were both wearing cracked and rusted knights armor that seemed to moan every time they moved. The two men seemed to be perfectly matched, each ones blow being caught by the other. But suddenly the tide seemed to switch. One of the men was becoming tired and weak, his swings barely hitting on the others sword. In one quick motion the other knight knocked the man swords out of his hand, sending it flying towards me.

The man fell to his knees, his labored breath filling to air around us as the seconds passed. The other knight stood over his for a second and stared down at him, his long rusted sword to his neck. In one motion he screamed and swung his sword across the man neck, decapitating him in one swift motion. The man suddenly fell to his knees. leaning on his sword as it plunged through the bottom of the train car. The man slowly looked up at me, his bloodshot blue eyes staring into mine.

"Well well, another challenger to my title." He slowly began to stand up, his armor creaking as he did. The body of the dead man continued to writhe and twitch as the blood poured out of his neck. With each second that passed, more and more blood would spurt out onto the cold metal floor until his heart finally stopped beating.

"You dare stand against one such as me! Even my own son could not defeat me. What are you but another pawn in the game?" His voice had a anger to it that seemed to rattle his entire body. He raised his sword up to me, his arm shaking as the weight of it pressed against his strained muscles. His face was old and wrinkly, as if he had seen a thousand battles in his lifetime. But here he was. Ready for one last fight.

"Now you will die like the rest of them. Usurpers all of them. The throne is mine I tell ye. Mine!" And as the words left his mouth he lunged forward, his sword coming towards my midsection. There was nowhere for me to go but forward. I closed my eyes and prepared for the worst. But before he even reached me he collapsed on the floor, the sounds of his plate metal hitting the floor ringing through the train car around me. As the man lay there twitching and dying, he turn over and faced me.

"My own son. How could he betray my trust. How could he try to seize something that was already his to begin with! My life. The love of ever day gone. Where I had felt anger before, is now nothing but sadness. I bid you good fortune in the wars to come." He began to cough, blood rolling down the sides of his mouth. With one last breath, he died. His chest stopped moving and I was left with the sounds of drops of blood hitting metal. Drip, drop, drip, drop it echoed in my ears.

The train car around me was covered in slashes and scratches that covered every inch of metal I could see. Some of them cut so deep in the metal that the world outside could be seen, be it a blur of endless darkness. With the amount of blood on the floors around me, it was surprising to know that either of them had any left. I weaned my way through the carnage and stepped into the next hallway, taking a deep breath as I closed the door behind me. In front of me was yet again another metal door, the same foggy glass as every other one. I cursed under my breath. Maybe I would take my chances with the old man. No, I had to keep moving.

I opened the door in front of me slowly, not knowing what monster what wait behind it. Inside was a normal looking man, ragged clothes covering him from head to toe. He looked as if he was praying. He turned to look at me for a moment. His bloodshot eyes stared into mine for a moment.

"God isn't real. No matter how much you pray to him, it is all nothing but a ruse. He didn't save my daughter from cancer. He watched her die just like I did. Now I pray to the only thing that matters in my life. The sweet embrace of death." he looked back towards his hands, not even noticing me as I walked past him to the door at the other end of the train car. Even as I turned one last time before entering the small hallways for what felt like the tenth time. When would this end?

I opened the next door and was immediately hit with the irony smell of blood and gore. As I walked into the room, the sounds of animals growling could be heard ever so slightly. In the dark corner to my left was a humans body being torn apart by something in the shadows. Only its eyes could be seen, reflecting the light from the ceiling. It glanced at me for a moment before going back to the corpse, the sounds of meat being torn from bone filling the train car. I looked to the right and noticed a man sitting against the wall. His hands were died red with blood, and his face was bruised and swollen.

"I had to do it. He was fucking my wife! That fucking whore. I should have known after all this time that she would be the one that would make me do this. Now look at them!" He pointed to the corner where the body was being picked at by something unseen. I noticed that there was a separate set of bones to the right of the body. The bones had scratches and cracks all over them, as if they had been chewed on by a dog. Or at least I could hope it was just a dog. The man began to stand up, his joints cracking as he straightened his back.

"She always knew what I was capable of if she fucked me over." He started to walk towards me, one of his feet dragging ever so slightly. "Now she is nothing more then a dead whore. As for him, well. He got what he deserved when I slashed his neck from ears to ear. The look in his eyes as the life drained from him will stick with me always. My neighbor for decades and more. He was a friend. But, I must leave you now." The man suddenly pulled a small razor blade from his pocket and ran it across his throat. Blood sprayed across the room, landing inches from my shoes. He slowly crumbled to the floor, the air trying as hard as it could to reach through his severed wind pipe. A raspy noise filled the air as I covered my mouth, trying as hard as I could to not gag as the nauseating smell of iron filled the air. Something in the corner behind me suddenly moved.

It was a winged creature of sorts with a human like head. As soon as it showed itself I moved my way to the other side of the cabin, quickly reaching my hand out towards the doorknob and twisting it. I turned and looked at it as I fought the door to get it open. It simply ignored me, trotting its way over to the still twitching body and grabbing it with its mouth. Long, dagger like teeth could be seen grabbing into the mans neck. He let out one last groan before it twisted his head, snapping it in an instant. It looked at me and cawed before pulling the body back into the dark corner that it came from. I finally pulled the door open and slid into the dark hallway. I closed my eyes for a moment, the slow drum of my heart the only noise I could hear.

The light sounds of chatter could be heard through the doorway in front of me. Men and women alike chatting back and forth with each other. My body was beginning to give out on itself. Each step forward was a chore that never seemed to end. With a shaky hand I reached my hand out and turned the knob for what I hoped was the last time.

The smell of spices and food immediately filled my nostrils as I slowly opened the doorway. In front of me was two rows of people arguing back and forth as they shook their hands at each other.

"This is the best oil that the world has ever seen! The finest seeds the world has world has ever seen pressed with such care and devotion that only a fool would resist it. For a small price of ten shillings, a steal if I say so myself." A man was shaking a bottle at an elderly women who was selling some kind of rock out of here hands.

"Who needs bloody oil when I can sell you gems from the heavens themselves! They sparkle and glimmer more then the moon on a summer night. All you need to do is buy one of these and your life will be-" Another man suddenly buts in from their side, shaking what looks to be some form of jewelry.

"You fools would be considered royalty in my jewelry. My jewels and precious metals will turn even a dog into a icon of prosperity and wellness! I sell them cheap! Cheaper then any other man in this square! I bet my life on it." The pair begins to argue as others behind them join in. They suddenly notice me, their bulging eyes analyzing my every move. They all turn towards me as a roar of yelling and arguing fills the air. As I walk past them towards the doorway in front of me, they shove and place items in front of me. From jewelry to food and other things, they have it all. It is pointless however. I limp my way past them and slip through the doorway, leaving them to their mess behind me.

My heartbeat is slowing to a crawl as I reach out to the metal doorknob in front of me. I have lingered for too long. All the life in my body feels as if it is all but gone. With one last bust of energy I open the doorway, falling through it as the metal hinges creak open. I land in something wet feeling and cold. My eyes strain for a moment and notice a white substance falling around me. Snow?

"What the fuck?", I say to the ground underneath me. I strain to push myself off the ground, my muscles tightening as I rise. I woman voice fills the air. One that causes me to lift my eyes up.

"Derrick." My eyes make contact with my deceased wife's, whose are bloodshot and wet with tears. "After all this time, you should have known. You should have known what would have happened when you did what you did. How could you?" I slowly stand to my feet, the warm feeling of blood rolling down the side of my face. She walks up to me, setting a cold hand on my cheek.

"You betrayed me. You caused this." She pulls my face down to her wrists, which have long vertical slashes running through them. "You could have done it with anyone else. Anyone." Her voice is breaking, the words cracking as the come out of her mouth. "But you had to have her. My best friend. But now I am free of both of you and your lies. To betray the one you love is the worst thing a person can do." She pauses for a moment, her eyes staring right through mine.

She leans in closer to me. I can feel her cold, icy breath on my tip of my ear. " And now I am afraid, nothing can save you from the path you have gone down. Not even me. You have come so far, and I am so proud of you. But now, it is time for me to let you go." She pauses again, the air whipping outside the train car. "The final player in this game my love, is you." And with those words the area around me turn to black. As I stare through the endless abyss around me, a cold wind creeps its way into my skin. Into the very core of my body. I look down and see that I am standing on a frozen lake, its ice going as far as the eye can see in every direction.

The ice below me begins to crack as I stand there and panic looking for any way out. The ice suddenly breaks, sending me into the icy water below. The air is sucked from my lungs as shock sets in. I sink further and further away from the black hole above me. I am nothing more than a shell of a man. I can't remember my moms face or my dads eyes. The names of any of my siblings. They are ghosts like me, trapped in the endless cold of my mind. Only my wife's cold words can be heard as I sink to the bottom. As the water fills my lungs for the last time, the familiar tune from before can be heard in the darkness.

No more sailing

So long, sailing

Bye-bye, sailing

Goodbye, Captain

Silence.