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Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Wind' (2018)

Gone with the timeline...

By Reed AlexanderPublished 2 months ago 3 min read
2

Ho-lee-crap this movie was fucking forgettable. I seriously mean that. I just watched it two days ago and I can barely remember fuck-all about it. All I can really remember is how much it irritated me. There was very little to like about this movie. I mean, the premise and the plot were fine, it was just a poor execution with a particularly weak ending. And the ending is pretty much my all-time most hated trope next to 'Black Guy Dies First.' If you know my reviews well enough, that's actually a bit of a spoiler but I'll talk about this later in the actual spoilers.

I mean, the cinematography was beautiful. Like The VVitch (2015) everything about the setting and the cinematography was picturesque. Indeed, this movie captured the same gritty realism of the frontier that The VVitch did for colonial America. Unfortunately, just fucking like The VVitch, this movie was FUCKING BORING. It's like they went out of their way to make every single scene dramatic to the point it just felt like silly melodrama. Jesus fucking Christ, there isn't even any dialog for like the first ten minutes. Just the characters posing dramatically in complete fucking silence.

That wasn't even the worst part of this fucking movie. The worst part is that it jumps around between three timelines with ZERO fucking warning and you basically just have to GUESS which one you're in. It's so bad I didn't even realize it was jumping around at first, which made me EXTREMELY fucking confused. And as far as I can tell, there's abso-fucking-lutely no goddamn good reason for it. At least The VVitch was fucking linear. Listen, I don't have a problem with time jumps, but this was fucking hamfisted. It was clumsy to the point of being insulting.

Now, the acting was good... but who the fuck care. This movie was nigh unwatchable. I genuinely feel bad for the actors taking part in this shit show. I mean, I want them to go on to better things, because they were good enough they deserve better things. I genuinely hope this movie doesn't ruin their careers.

If you can't tell, I don't recommend this movie, but I've been saving the biggest reason why for the spoilers...

SPOILERS!!!

The FUCKING Scooby-Do effect strikes again. Nothing paranormal is happening in this movie, the main character is just hallucinating a demonic monster in the winds. First, she has the trauma of losing her pregnancy (timeline 1), then she discovers her husband cheated on her with the neighbor's wife (timeline 2), then she murders the neighbor's wife in a fit of jealousy, not only killing her but killing her baby (timeline three). So she goes crazy and starts hallucinating a sinister presence in the winds at night.

And hell, why not just have a sinister presence in the winds at night? The female lead murdered a woman and her unborn baby. That's like the perfect place for a demon to take root. If they'd gone with that, this movie could have been written linearly. It could be about a woman slowly losing her mind and getting attacked by some demonic phantom. At least The VVitch got that right. There didn't need to be but there were actual fucking witches and even the devil himself.

Which is what really pisses me off about the timeline jumps. They're just there to throw you off the trail that this is all made up in the female lead's head. Really, they couldn't successfully hide their twist ending, so they try to scramble it into a jumbled timeline.

Yeah, fuck this movie.

movie reviewpsychologicalsupernatural
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About the Creator

Reed Alexander

I'm the foulmouthed horror movie critic. I post new reviews every Sunday, so stay tuned =D

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