Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Device' (2014)

I'm just gonna start by pointing out that nothing as cool as that movie poster ever happens in this movie. I mean, that's some Ghost In the Shell (1995) graphics but it never happens. ANYWHO, my fucking god, this movie was a slog. Yes, it passes my 30 Minute Rule, yes something is always technically happening but fuck sake is it so damn slow. I was bored to tears by the first 30 minutes and I really just didn't want to keep watching. But some-fucking-how I made it through all the way to the end to see the seriously anticlimactic ending.

I'm not even sure it was pacing. As I said, something was always happening it just really wasn't that interesting. It all starts when these two sisters find this little black orb. And, I mean, that seems kinda neat at first, but then it's just like any craven object movie. The husband of the first sister becomes obsessed with it but it goes a long fucking way into suspending disbelief with plot developments that make no sense. It's really not all that interesting, to be honest.

I guess the plot is okay. The second sister has this secret trauma that she doesn't want to talk about. It's a deep connection between her and the first sister. The first sister was a bit estranged from their mother and the second sister is a bit resentful of that. The most important part is that the second sister doesn't seem to be clearly honest about what happened to her after she was 'attacked' by her abusive ex-boyfriend leading to an eventual abortion. That writing isn't terrible, in fact, it's got some pretty good meat on it and leads to some actually pretty smart dialog between the two sisters.

Which brings me to the acting. The two sisters were actually pretty good. The first sister's husband wasn't terrible. The actors just get worse from there. Some of them being quite hammy. But you know what? It's still good enough for horror. Our bar has always been pretty low and they are still above it. Frankly, I can absolutely see the two sisters getting more work from here.

You know, the atmosphere and the cinematography weren't that bad either. They did everything right with their meager budget. The lighting and filters were good and even their rubber monster wasn't that bad looking for what it was.

Frankly, this movie did just about everything right. Maybe if it was true to the movie poster it would have been more interesting. I quite frankly was hoping for something a little more than three people fighting over a black orb. I can't really recommend it but it's a good study for movies that go wrong when the director and writer do everything right.

SPOILERS!!!

So, the big secret the second sister doesn't want to tell the first is that her boyfriend didn't beat and rape her, leading to an unwanted pregnancy and inevitable abortion. -By the way, this movie walks a pretty thin line, almost crossing into anti-choice politics.- She was actually abducted by aliens and raped by them. She was then forced to get an abortion by her mother because... I mean, who could fucking blame her.

As it turns out, this is actually alien abduction horror. The black orb everyone is fighting over is an alien device that goes and impregnates the first sister. Now the aliens are hanging around waiting to harvest.

That's another thing. Why the fuck did the aliens start fucking with the husband. They didn't have anything to gain from it. He would have eventually figured out the baby wasn't his and that would have taken care of itself. Also, once the orb delivered the 'seed' and the tracking device, it didn't serve a purpose and the aliens could have retrieved it at any time.

Yeah, not the best work I've seen. Give it a pass.