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Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Scary Stories To Tell In The Dark' (2019)

Not a bad take on a classic

By Reed AlexanderPublished about a year ago 3 min read
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What do I say about this movie? It wasn't bad. Actually, it was quite clever but some how it was also really bland. I don't know, maybe it's because it was yet another PG-13 horror movie, which always manages to hamper the movie by castrating the good stuff. Maybe it's because it was based on a children's book and it was bound to be kinda soft. I think maybe they wanted to introduce this to a younger audience but in a way that still appealed to the adults that remember it. I don't know, like I said, it was clever but it just didn't impress me.

So what was wrong with this movie? The acting was pretty good. Better than you'd expect for horror. It can be a little hammy at times, but that's just the tone of the movie. They clearly wanted to catch the 80's vibe of the books.

The atmosphere is pretty spot on. They really made an effort to make every scene involving the stories spooky. There was unnecessary CGI when they could have settled for better practical FX. It seemed like the face of the fat lady was CGI which was wholly unnecessary. It also wasn't particularly good CGI. That's inexcusable for a big production like this. But outside of that, everything was spot on. The settings were solid, the use of lighting and filter good, most of the costumes were on point. And of course there was a touch of 80's horror aesthetic.

The story was even good. Anyone who read the Scary Stories books would have assumed this would be an anthology. The fact that Guillermo del Toro and the other writers saw a feature-length film was quite a feat of imagination. They tied several stories together using an interesting McGuffin. I can't really talk about it too much without spoilers and it's not problematic enough to bring up in the spoilers. I guess you'll just have to watch the movie.

So, what was wrong with this movie? It's like what I said about the tone. The stories were just kinda boring. I think what was fascinating about them when I was a kid was just didn't translate well to the screen. I don't know, I just didn't feel this the way I felt the book.

Listen, I'm not saying don't watch this. It's worth it. It deserves at least one viewing. Just don't go in with super high expectations.

~

SPOILERS!!!

Did we really just base this whole damn movie on 'Bad Ghost.' That's when the plot is based on a vengeful spirit that doesn't seem to be good at hitting the right target. Bad Ghost is one of the dumbest tropes to base a movie on. What the fuck is the point of a haunting for revenge if the ghost takes revenge out on everybody but the fucking people that wronged them? Like, they tried to explain it that the ghost just became bitter and evil from being wronged, but like... what the fuck is its motivation? Like, at least go after the children of the people that wronged you or something? Why fuck with some random kids? Like, at first the damn ghost even seemed to sympathize with the kids. Which makes sense based on the ghost's origins.

And the ending was just fucking weak. Spitting some moralist bullshit at the ghost to get her to stop. Why couldn't they come up with an ending that involved some fucking necromancy or some shit? Like, set it up as a puzzle to figure out. Ending the movie by yelling at a ghost is just lame. It smacks of bad writing. Actually, 'Bad Ghost' IS bad writing so I can't say if the ending is much worse.

And for fuck sake, the "we're gonna get our friends back" exit was super dumb.

I know the spoilers are pretty harsh, but I promise this movie is worth at least one go. Give it a shot.

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About the Creator

Reed Alexander

I'm a horror author and foulmouthed critic of all things horror. New reviews posted every Monday.

@ReedsHorror on TikTok, Threads, Instagram, YouTube, and Mastodon.

Check out my books on Godless: https://godless.com/products/reed-alexander

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