Penetration

There was only one rule: don’t open the door… But some doors will crack open if you’re clumsy enough to bump the latch.

…. And they’ll swing wide while you’re fumbling with the lock.

So it was and so it is with spiritual doors. The heart, mind, and soul are not the fortresses we need them to be.

They never were.

The heart is weak— plagued by yearning— and the mind is webbed by its own neuroses: anxiety, depression, obsession, grief, even self doubt.

These cognitive feedback loops are doors of their own, and when they begin to yawn you must lock them tight! For when they are allowed to creak open they bloom like molding fruits. They spiral out of balance and into the infinite sunken hallways of confusion and despair.

When a subconscious is off kilter it is disarmed. It can offer no protection to a bare and unmoored soul.

And there you’ll be: quivering in the naked darkness, but not alone. Vulnerable to infiltration.

And the Intruders know this well. They linger along the oozing fringes of minds in trouble, waiting for an opening.

I don’t know where they come from but I’ve spent enough time cowering beneath them to know why they’re here: they’re vagrants looking for a home. Not just any soul will do. They can only penetrate a wounded, naked soul.

I’ve let myself ruminate, instead of sealing those hallways off. I’ve meditated on regrets, wandered those spirals to their depths and allowed them to permeate my subconscious.

I’ve soaked my whole being in that inky darkness and that’s where I felt the gnawing presence of the Intruders, worming their way inside me like squatters in a derelict building.

If you feel them scratching at your soul, keep the door closed tight.