'Fantasy Island' (2020) Movie Review

Blumhouse’s new take on the beloved TV show from the 70’s and 80’s takes it into much darker territory. In this film, five strangers (Maggie Q, Lucy Hale, Ryan Hansen, Jimmy O. Yang, Austin Stowell) are given the chance to visit a magical, remote island in which, supposedly, they are able to live out their greatest fantasy. After being greeted by their host, Mr. Roarke (Michael Peña), he shows them around the resort and informs them that they will be granted their wishes the next day. However, their fantasies aren't exactly what they had hoped for, and the island itself seems to be harboring a dark secret.

I haven't seen a ton of the original series, but I've seen enough clips to know the general gist. The idea of turning that premise into a horror movie actually seemed like a pretty cool idea. Given the show's semi-anthology nature, one could easily just use a similar wraparound, but for darker, more "Twilight Zone"-esque stories. That seemed like where the Blumhouse film was going, but unfortunately, it decided to take a different route. Just when it starts to head in that direction, the film suddenly has to have all of the now-warped fantasies converge. And that's about the time it all falls apart. Up until that point, the film was simply mediocre, but it all goes down hill from there. This movie is bad, but more than that, it’s dumb. It's really dumb.

A film called Truth Or Dare came out in 2018, and Fantasy Island was made by the same team. While I still think Truth or Dare is worse, many of that movie’s major failings are also present in Fantasy Island. The characters are either completely empty or obnoxiously unlikable. Lucy Hale is a main character in both films, and she is just not very good. She comes across as alternately flat and far too broad; not quite on a Disney Channel level, but not far off. Poor Maggie Q is just given nothing. Her role is supposed to be one of the more emotionally-charged characters in the story, but she can’t manage to create anything worthwhile from the script and/or direction. Ryan Hansen and Jimmy O. Yang play J.D. and Brax, two hard-partying step-brothers, and they’re just the f**king worst. I guess their over-the-top douchiness is supposed to be funny, but it’s absolutely agonizing. They tried to add a little bit of depth to them by having Brax be gay, which resulted in him being disowned by his parents, therefore making J.D. his only true friend. While this was well-intentioned, it fell flat due to the film’s overall lack of heart or wit. Austin Stowell, who has done plenty, but has yet to really make a name for himself, is kind of boring here. His backstory and arc (which I won’t spoil, despite my not recommending the film) is so tired and bland that I’ve actually seen it in direct-to-video kids movies. I’m not joking. The actor who really gets the rawest deal here is Michael Peña. Peña is a great actor, and he’s proven his ability to excel in both comedy and drama, but what the hell happened here? He’s uncharacteristically dull. In the original series, the role of Mr. Rourke was played by the late, great Ricardo Montalbán. Montalbán was warm, charming, and jovial. I’ve seen Michael Peña portray those traits before, but for some reason, this version of Rourke is wooden and lifeless. I can only assume this was a result of the direction, given that the film doesn’t want you to trust anyone, so he needs to appear more mysterious. But if anything, I would think that would be all the more reason to have Mr. Rourke be his familiar, charismatic self. Either way, I found that really disappointing. Out of nowhere, Michael Rooker shows up in the movie. His character serves no purpose, other than to dispense exposition and/or be a red herring. Yet another outstanding character actor wasted.

As I said previously, the initial concept could possibly work as a horror anthology operating on Monkey’s Paw logic. But unfortunately, this is one case in which attempting to use a traditional three-act structure essentially shot the film in the foot. Like, with a bazooka. After the (already lackluster) first two acts come to a close, with our characters having discovered that their "fantasies" aren't all they're cracked up to be, the film throws in a big reveal about a sinister plot that connects all of them. This is also about the same time that the film begins to stop following the previously-established rules they had set for the Island. The twists just keep coming, and the logic keeps decaying, and I was just getting more and more annoyed. Again, despite this movie's gross incompetence, I'm gonna remain spoiler-free, but needless to say, the film's wrap-up is incredibly stupid, and it just further ruins the concept of having a darker alternate version of Fantasy Island.

Even though I'm sure there could be a cool way to put a horror twist on the classic TV series "Fantasy Island", this attempt by Blumhouse is a great example of how not to do so. It's a hodgepodge of tired and overused tropes and just pure annoyance, and the film's third act turns up the stupid to eleven, ruining any chances of it at least being saved by its novel premise.

SCORE: 1.5/5