Atomic Horrors and Crimes of War

"Someone is collecting nuclear weapons," begins a sudden new transmission that wakes you up after you fell asleep listening to a political livestream. When you check your phone, you notice that you're the only live viewer or listener. The screen is black. All you can hear is the voice: "You may wonder how do I know this is true, or what is the identity of this potential terrorist actor? The truth is I don't know anything 100%. It could be more than one person. It could even be a collective, for all I know, or it could be one individual lone wolf..."

You look out your window. You don't see any ominous mushroom cloud in the distance. You haven't even heard any loud, scary noises. You pause this peculiar (new) livestream and take off your headphones. Everything is absolute silence. You search for news on your computer. There's nothing unusual. Some talk and rumors of separatism. Murders and people getting arrested -- some of them going to jail for a long time, some of them ending up in prisons or psychiatric wards for much shorter periods. Yet what's the point of dwelling on any of this? Just be a good citizen and stop falling asleep to stupid political podcasts.

Should I continue listening to this dark, faceless livestream? you ask yourself. You put your headphones back on and press play. There are 32 new live viewers or listeners (making you the first and 33rd).

The voice continues: "Feelings of hatred and resentment, grudges, the humiliation and demonization of others, exaggerated fears, cycles of abuse and violence -- that is what will lead to acts of nuclear war or nuclear terrorism. Even you who are listening to this -- you, yourself, might be part of the problem!"

I don't need to hear this, you say to yourself and press Pause. You decide to listen to some music instead because you feel like you wouldn't be able to fall asleep, even if you tried. But you still have a few hours left before you have to wake up, so you decide to take a Relora capsule, a pink Benadryl tablet, and a CBD (cannabidiol) gem. What if the world really is ending? you ask yourself as you press Play on "Prelude" by Taylor Brook.

The experimental, avant-garde piano playing doesn't stop you from thinking, at least not completely. Isn't it paradoxical or ironic that some people who are anti-war or anti-imperialist think that every country should have nuclear weapons? Maybe it's not. Especially since the countries that already have nuclear weapons will never want to give up most or any of them, at least definitely not anytime soon, if ever... You fall asleep to images of burgundy maroon mushrooms.

When you wake up, the music of Julian Carrillo's "Preludio a Colon" is playing.

You are startled awake even more by what sounds like a loud explosion in the distance, yet so loud that it stridently cuts through the music so clearly that you feel compelled to press Pause right away. You also hear what sounds like loud voices outside the window, as well as permeating the entire apartment building. You open the balcony window and step onto the balcony. Two mushroom clouds are visible in the distance.

You suddenly start praying to every god you can think of: "Kali, please forgive me. Apollo, please forgive me. Hanuman, please forgive me. Jehovah or Yehowah, please forgive me. Jesus or Yeshua, please forgive me." You hear another explosion, and the sounds of other people screaming and praying. Everything is engulfed by a sudden blinding light, not to mention excruciating, searing pain...