Why Tamlin Will Always Have My Heart!

First of all, SPOILER ALERT! You probably already figured that, but just in case you haven’t read every Sarah J Maas book under the sun yet and want to, you have been warned.

About two years ago, I was introduced to the world of A Court of Thorns and Roses in much the same way so many others are nowadays – TikTok. I heard vague stories about a love interest turned villain in the character Tamlin, High Lord of the Spring Court. Controlling – violent – locks the woman in the dungeons below his castle when she doesn’t love him anymore. At least, that was the impression I got in the conversations and videos I witnessed while trying not to get full spoilers. Fast forward, and I eventually took the plunge and began reading the series myself, excited for the adventure I knew awaited me. I liked Feyre for the most part, at first. She could’ve been more complex, but you know, maybe that would come later.

But as I took in all that was the Spring Court, at the High Lord slowly starting to soften, I struggled with the difference in what I had been lead to believe. Here was a High Lord that was falling in love, showing Feyre pools of starlight and playing the fiddle so she could relax and dance into the night. He was her way into an extraordinary world of the fae, a way to leave her frankly crappy human life behind. It had been for an awful and unconventional reason she found herself taken to Prythian in the first place, but those kinds of situations are common in both real mythos and fantasy stories anyways. We find out later that Amarantha’s curse left him with very little choice, for the sake of his court and people. And even with them threatened, he chose to try to save Feyre by sending her away. It was in that moment, I knew. I knew that this High Lord, in spite of it all, would always try to do the right thing. He would always have love as the reason for his actions. He continually saved other fae not even in his court - had been fighting against an evil nearly alone for fifty years.

Yes, he had Lucien, loyal soldiers and servants, but he shouldered all of it alone. Whether that was necessary or healthy, well no one can be perfect. To look at another situation in the Night Court, there were many soldiers and friends close to Rhys that he could rely on. If, and many times when, Rhys needed help simply running his court or eventually fighting evils, he had an IC right there at his beck and call. I saw the isolation Tamlin suffered, the silent resignation to his lot as he made sure others were taken care of to the most of his ability. Even “lowly” humans with Feyre’s family.

All of that would surely drive someone mad. Yes, there were moments he nearly hurt others, and there is no excuse. Well…except when you are explicitly in an SJM story and the fae are repeatedly described as violent, grumpy, and territorial at the best of times. It makes no sense to set up the entire species as such in one instance and then condemn them in the next. If that’s how they are, then that’s how they are. Human standards need not apply in every instance. In others, Feyre pushes and pushes him with either immaturity or on purpose. But that is my own opinion.

Which brings me to the later conversations about Feyre as High Lady. It is said that Tamlin thinks of Feyre as an object, and one of the most common arguments for this is the expected behavior of the wife of a high lord. They are figureheads, doting, “proper” wives that don’t really make the decisions. Feyre is put in dresses, which she doesn’t accept until its apparently a sheer scrap of fabric for Rhys, not by Tamlin but Ianthe. At the beginning, when Tamlin leaves her dresses to wear and realizes she doesn’t like them, he has Alis switch them for the tunics and pants. After UTM, Ianthe pushes the expected behavior and image of the ideal high lord wife and manipulates her way into Tamlin’s influence. When asked about what Feyre’s title would be after the wedding, Tamlin asks if she would want to be High Lady and she says no. She’s not confident she’d be able to handle or want it. As far as we are told, there has never been a High Lady in any court. Far from being a sign of Tamlin’s treatment of Feyre, it shows the sexist culture of the fae. It is an issue all of that society needs to address, and he does not outright say Feyre cannot have the title. She is very young, especially compared to the fae, and does not know how the courts work. She naively helps water wraiths at a tithe, after which Tamlin gets mad at her actions that put his position in jeopardy – later apologizing profusely. Though she desires to help, she ignores how this favoritism could look to others, how much tithing money is left to run the Spring Court, and the changes that could actually bring lasting benefits to Tamlin’s people.

Now, as far as Tamlin’s inability to help Feyre UTM, I believe that has been fully explained, as well. He was constantly monitored by Amarantha. There was no way he would be able to get Feyre out, and even if he did, there would be nowhere to go that she would not find, and his court would still be at her mercy in the meantime. After the last trial, when Feyre stabbed him, he had a gaping wound and was physically incapable of healing until Feyre broke the curse. Many give the credit to Rhys in the instance, when it was Tamlin who actually unalived Amarantha the second the curse lifted and he could heal enough to attack. It nearly broke him to see Feyre suffer and be unalived herself, and he retained that ptsd throughout the rest of the series. So when Feyre received powers, and the King of Hybern was still a threat, Tamlin was out of his mind with fear that someone would come after her again. And he was proven right when she was attacked nearly right after leaving with Rhys! There was good reason to not train her quite yet, while she was still so new to being fae, even if Ianthe was making him even more paranoid and convincing him not to. Feyre was restless, and reckless, and didn’t care that she might get someone hurt in the process. She blamed Tamlin for trying to protect her.

When Tamlin left to defend the Spring Court from another monster and Feyre insisted on going, she was not going to listen to him explain. He gave her several options, but she stubbornly refused all. In a split-second decision, he put a protective enchantment around the manor and she was unable to leave until he got back. He didn’t see her reaction…her panic. If he had, I believe he would’ve realized sooner the impact it had. And within a minute she was scooped up by Mor and Rhys and taken to the Night Court, literally never having a true and full conversation with Tamlin again. But there it was, Tamlin “locking” her in. For all of about two minutes. Not in a dungeon, not even in a single room, but within the sprawling mansion with all the usual comforts simply until he could return and make sure she was safe. He did it out of fear and love. So entirely different than the situation I had thought people talked about in the first videos and conversations I had seen.

He only received a note in return saying goodbye, previously knowing her to be illiterate. Of course he would think that Rhys, his long-time enemy and previous right-hand of another, had taken her against her will and was controlling her mind. He could turn to no one else, had no other options but to try and get help from Hybern. And after becoming a spy, after saving so many others characters and turning the tide of the war in the end, after giving up a kernel of his power to bring back Rhys and telling Feyre to “be happy, feyre,” he is still villainized. Totally alone, no closure from Feyre, he is further verbally beaten by Rhys. That is why I will always root for this character. He made mistakes - he knows it and feels regret without even the courtesy of being able to apologize. He is complex. His story feeling incomplete. I hope he can get his happy ending too.

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