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Live action Pinocchio coming to Disney+ in Sept

by Hapsetshut The Pharaoh 2 months ago in movie
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Here we go again, Disney

Where was this hiding for 2 moths then?

How has Disney’s track record been with live-action remakes lately? Little sub-par ya thinking? What was the last one, Cruella, I think? Definitely, not the worst but kinda felt like too much of its own thing to really be considered the same character we knew from Disney if you ask me. But i guess they had to do something different cause they already had those two live-action “101 Dalmatians” movies.

Can someone tell me how that girl in the squeal relates to the first movie? I was decently young when I saw these movies so I might just missed some things but is she like someone who adopted the dogs? Is she the divorced wife of the guy from the first movie? I never did figure that out but i really didn’t care too much there were puppies. Looking back at it now that whole “102 Dalmatian” movie really did not make sense outside the main plot. And by that, I mean the plot of Cruella being hypnotized to like animals than having that process reversed by big ben’s ringing and then trying to get even by teaming up with another fur crazy fashion designer, makes more sense than the stuff the protagonist was doing in-between.

Coming back from that tangent now, Disney+ has a little preview section to show teasers and crap for what they’re working on, just added this live-action Pinocchio trailer. Ok I know we just had this conversation with the ‘She-Hulk’ CG, and I am one who will always maintain that you should not judge a work till you see the finished product, but what the hell is up with those green screen CG backgrounds? Like…it’s a straight-to Disney+ movie, ala the ‘Lady and the Tramp’ remake (full disclosure I was told that movie was so mid I have yet to watch it to this day), I get that I really do, but like even the ‘Lady and the Tramp’ movie had like sets and locations and the stuff! I feel like they were excited about this movie at the beginning, like really excited. They got all these big-name actors, good big-name actors, too. Tom Hanks as Geppetto, Joseph Gordon-Levitt as Jiminy, I’m gonna be honest with ya I don’t see what they say in that one but that boys probably gonna do a fine job with it, so I’m not bothered.

I think Disney might actually have a contract over Keegan-Michael Key soul either that or he just jumps at the chance whenever they even mention a movie to him. He’s the fox, I don’t they have the cat in this version, the fox's sidekick cat not Frigerio. Figeroa’s in it they show him and fishy in the trailer.

They decided to pull a 180* on us with the Blue Fairy and cast Cynthia Erivo in the role. I ain’t gonna get mad about that they can mix things up all they want. Plenty of other people are probably gonna bitch about Disney’s woke agenda though which will be the only real drawback to casting her, that is unless she ya know just sucks. I’ve seen a tidbit of her woke though and I do believe she’s who they cast in the movie adaption of ‘Wicked’. *googles* Yup she is. It doesn’t say that directly on the Wiki only that she’s cast but I as an avid watcher of ‘The Grahm Norton Show’ she did in fact announce she was playing such and that she is a huge fan and has been seeing the musical ever since she was a teenager. As long as we don’t get another ‘Into the woods. So much squandered potential *single tear*.

Luke Evans is the guy who runs Pleasure Island, and they’ve added a few new characters, of course, including one called ‘Sofia the Seagull’, and honestly just the sound of that makes me worried because it sounds very much like some pasea character for a show intended for very young children. The whole trailer has me worried it’s so half-baked it almost reminds me of when kids use aftereffects and make youtube movies, which I love by the way but that is not what I want, or dare would even suspect from Disney. Also, in this teaser, we don’t ever get to see Pinocchio Pinocchio. We see him as the wooden doll Geppetto makes, and interestingly enough they’ve chosen to have a real wooden doll filmed for this part with striking detail to that of the original cartoon version. Makes me think they want to sell something similar.

Going the route of the older movies is the best option if they want to keep making these live-action adaptations. The older films aren’t as heavily ingrained into popular consciousness as the more recent ones are, but they are still recognizable and beloved enough to bring in the crowds, well subs in this case. Also, the oldest movies could stand for a smidge of updating here and there i’ve nothing against updates for a modern audience, they just have tended to focus on the wrong parts or overfocus on parts. I’m looking at you live-action Cinderella!

Perhaps I’m over worried, perhaps given the time they will be able to clean everything up and make it look stunning. Perhaps the story and acting will be truly captivating and the story will be timeless and nostalgic and will be beloved by all and restore our wavering faith in Disney as a company, BUT, I’ve been wrong before.

Oh also legit just found out after I was done writing this that your man GUILLERMO ‘FUCKING’ DEL TORO has made a stop-motion looking Pinocchio that will be airing on Netflix, so depending on the timing of things and the reception, that could kill Disney’s chances right there in the water. Dayum son, we gonna see how this turns out then *pours wine*

I can’t tell if that’s Ewan McGregor or David Tennent narrating

Ok just saw the end, it’s Ewan

Oh, shit they got Ron Perlman and Cate Blanchett too? And she’s the blue fairy! And has a boss-ass Elden ring looking design? Oh dude I am sooo hyped now

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About the author

Hapsetshut The Pharaoh

I write the things, all of them. All the things. You can find more things I write on my Tumblr hapsetshut.tumblr.com

twitter also Hapsetshut

And insta, Happy_skull_productions

Patron and kofi, also Hapsetshut

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